Yogan's Journey to Life

 A grand pattern I have uncovered is this connection between guilt and anger. Where it is an desire to make another feel guilty, as the purpose reason for getting angry at them. And in so doing, giving permission for oneself to continue to feel guilt when others are angry at oneself. So by accepting one you continue allowing the other.  So to reiterate the above: imagine someone is angry at you, and then see if you feel guilt at all. Or see if you do change according to them. Maybe you don't feel guilt, maybe you feel anger instead, but within that anger in response to their anger, you goal is to make them feel guilty. I suggest then that perhaps you are suppressing your guilt, because look you have in fact reacted to their anger. You are not moving as pure expression as self. So firstly try to release the anger. So what I did that lead to this realization is similar to the above. I felt angry at anothers anger, I couldn't release it, but I wanted to. So I allowed myself to fe...

 Hello blog, how are you doing? So one of the epic observations I have had of myself, and thus extrapolating to all selves, is how the system of the solar plexus location of emotions functions, and how the systems of the physical heart, and lungs function as components of the mind consciousness system.  Firstly consider how the inbreath is specific for when a person is angry. The breath I have observe with myself as well as people around me. This in conjunction with how the heart also beats specifically= the level of pressure pushes and rhythm is moves within is specific to match the anger.  Similarly with fear/nervousness.  So in principle one can create a device to measure what can already be observed individually, and thus it can assist those who are unaware or lack the awareness to observe their heart/lungs. While not a replacement for self-practice, it is revolutionary.  Plus given the information we know of the mind consciousness system. It makes sense tha...

 The process is this: 1)taking the emotions/feelings and feeling them: 'in other words, facing them.' And letting it go. If you can't let it go, then that is where you apply self-forgiveness. The gift of forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the ability of a man or woman to gossip and twist the opinions and minds of others, so as to attack me. It is my birthright to be god-like, a creator, who stands absolute without wavering: untouchable by the actions of others. Great power invites challenge. Just like the birth of a superhero, leads to the invitation of super villains. Because that is the nature of the mind. It wants to take on the challenge, and the fight, with its adrenaline rush joy of winning. So when it sees someone in the process of standing free and succeeding, it wants to tear them down. Fulfilling the role of the villain so as to witness to story/drama of a hero failing.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fea...

 So the one practice that we must do is to stop the mind. This means firstly recognizing your mind as it manifests a thought for you to hear or an emotion for you to feel. Voices in your head speaking to you is indeed crazy. As well as following these voices. And the sad fact is that everyone on Earth has these voices. Sadder still is that most consider this voice to be their own voice: the great deception of our reality. That is why people are so crazy, why we kill, why we are apathetic, cold, lost, confused, because we are not in our seat of power, we are in fact not in control of our lives. This is made worse by the fact that lives were predetermined to have certain outcomes based on the trajectory of your mind. That is to say your mind is not looking out for what is best for you. Its only goal is to generate as much energy as possible so that it survive, no matter the consequences for its host. So some of us lead "successful" or affluent lives, and others in poverty. For ...

 One of the indications of self application is the ability to stop. To in any moment, stop the mind, and simply be here in this moment. In this void the mind struggles to fight back, thus it plans instead for its next moment to strike. People are either on the side of the mind, or on the side of Life without the mind.  It was considered crazy for people to live without the mind, without thinking. Because the mind uses scare tactics to keep you in check. How it twists words and twists your gut. Yet for those of us really strong ones, we can bend the mind like a twig.  All real strength derives from life, and thus from self. The connection to all things everywhere. The mind likes to own things, own feelings, own the way and path to surviving day to day. And that is power. But you can take all that power for yourself. That raw power can be in your hands, to decide who you are and what you express in every moment. For will you live the fate of life in the hands of the mind? o...

  The day a friend's dog bit me, I didn't know any better. Based on my experience this dog, this dog was calm, was not barking or being aggressive. If anything, it looked shy. And the way my friend told me that careful the dog my bite, it sounded like so chill and not a big deal. And it was in a context of me entering her car and not putting my hand to the back to pet the dog. So far I never experienced or heard of a dog biting in this way with that demeanor. One second so calm, and immediately just biting, without warning. The dogs I have seen would bark heavily, growl, or make some other indication that they will strike. If they weren't like that they would at least be energetic, or happy. Another demeanor is a shy dog that was how one of my dogs( that passed away) would be around strangers.  In a way it was a gap in my knowledge and experience as well as my friend being so chill about the dog potentially biting. The dog and the situation were exceptional. And it all came...

 So I have been using Authority incorrectly. And it has to do with my relationship to Authority. My design is one where I completely submitted to and feared not meeting the expectations of Authority. So I was motivated to do what I did, getting good grades, learning, behaving in class, which included denying myself socializing in class, not being loud, not drawing too much attention to myself, and trusting in authority. So if I were ever in a position of Authority, I would expect the same behavior from others to my Authority. So I naturally would be angry and frustrated (edit: I felt angry and frustrated because I was expecting others to conform to my Authority, when I am in a position of Authority, just like I conformed to others in positions of Authority) I have been letting go of my fear of Authority. And it is changing me radically. It is allowing me to see how I can relate to others without placing expectations on them. I am equally not placing expectations on myself that had ...

 The One Test: Decide that I will not be thinking for the next few minutes. You are the one who makes that decision. "I decide I will not think for now" See then what happens as you live your decision. What I see is that there are voices, which are thoughts speaking, that are not my decision. I did not decide to think those things. I never decided to think them. I know they didn't come from my decisions.  This One Test, that all of humanity can perform, reveals how we have a stream of thoughts throughout our day that is not our choice. When we choose something, that is us. When we say I will stop doing this and you immediately stop it. That decision is you. What makes living our decisions difficult is the fact that we aren't paying attention to what we are doing and living in this moment. What we are thinking is not our decisions. Our thoughts is not us. And I will call this collection of stuff that is not us, the mind (as many others have done so in the past and pres...

 The Design of Love is to serve the Mind. That is to serve the enslavement of ourselves, and the non-realization of what and who we are. The greatest strength that serves love's deception is everyone belief that it is good, that it should be protected. This primarily comes from moments of feeling good and labeling that as love. Its a simple design yet effective. With this protection, love then can be utilized to do harm, because it is said to be done in the name of Love.  I personally am committed to making money and using that money to help people. Yet it is seen as bad, because of the design that says you should do something you Love to do. As if doing something you Love to do is the right choice. And one of the fears I have is what if what I do to make money becomes obsolete. Well, the commonsense answer is that I can simply do something else that makes money. I see living for doing something you love to do, is essentially a ruse where I want to avoid doing things that make...

 I am feeling a lot of things. I do want to run away and hide from what I am feeling, and from the people that are bringing them up in me. I know that what I feel is from me, and not from them. I feel afraid of dissappointing people, like my parents, but also my friends. I am afraid of dissappointing people because they may leave me. And I want to keep people with me.  I rather hide and not deal with anyone. I know that I also get dissapointed in other people and so get angry at them. And I think to myself that I am only helping them, by keeping them on the right path. And I hate myself for this because I know it drives people away, which is the opposite of what I want. I feel like I have to be dissappointed in myself and angry at myself in order to keep myself on the right path.  I rather run away and not deal with people, so i don't have to be disappointed in them or try to keep them on the right path. Then i avoid being angry. I dont want to be angry.  Maybe I don...

 What are the points that other people's relationship with me represent? Love, acceptance, approval, respect, praise, esteem, happiness, joy, admiration, attention, fun,   I need to live these points for me, with me, alone.  Every time I share something to other people, online or in person, or I do a work, a test, or quiz, and receive feedback from the professor or my parents, or anyone really, its like I am looking for those above words, because I AM NOT GIVING MYSELF THOSE WORDS ALREADY TO MYSELF. If I give myself those words, if I live those expressions, then I will be fulfilled thus I don't need to look to others. And for those who think or say, well you don't need those words, or why bother with the words at all, it is because we are everything, we are expressions, we are not meant to be blank slates or zombies. It is through living, flowing, moving, creating.  An expression, a huge smile, a great laugh, and jump up and down, is who we are. When who we are,...

 So I recently updated my facebook from a cat to that of a lion. This is a symbol for me, that represents how I am utilizing strength in the form as a roar. Strength is very important. Without strength we cannot stand in the difficult moments nor do what must be done. So for me there are past moments where I wasn't able to bring forth the strength needed. And so I would allow for abuse time and again. And by allowing abuse, my integrity was degrading as well. And so I wasn't able to live with myself, live happily and trust me.  So finding that strength now, where I will not allow the mind, will not allow abuse till the end of times. That no matter what comes at me, I will not bend, I will not stop, and I will succeed. This attitude is not one I had previously in my life. I had an attitude of believing in trying, in mistakes, and time to understand and learn. These are not bad attributes, they are positive ones, but alone they are not enough to stand in certain moments. There a...

 One of the things needed is strength. And the greatest source of strength is breath. People of the mind and of the current world system will tell you that strength comes from emotions like anger, or fear or love. And they will act that way. But that is not real strength, since emotions are just mined versions of the body's matter. The substance of the physical is the source that allows for the mind to even exist, and play out its illusions. The physical owns it all. Thus by standing with the physical, you own it all.  That is how we will change the world, through simple physical actions as physical beings. Where the physical takes over. No more allowing the realm of the mind to exist in these bodies. If you want to know real power, just breath. And end your mind. That is the one thing that normal people of the system cannot and dare not do, would be to end their thoughts or challenge their thoughts. Thus that alone is proof of the lie and of the enslavement.  So free you...

 The real life. the Life that is eternal, that is everything one and equal. You are either Life or you are the abuser of Life. Life does fight back. If there is a coup, life fights back. If there is gossip made, life fights back. The fight is interesting because Life stands proud, in honesty and with integrity. Whereas the Mind would work in the shadows, plotting, looking for revenge.  The most important thing you can have in this Life is Self, the real self. Nothing else holds any value in comparison to that. If you don't have this self, you have nothing. This self is having the power, the responsibility, and the ability to create. And part of that responsiblity is fighting back, and no allowing any abuse. When someone abuses, you stop it. And you know the abuse is within the mind, within the thought. That is where the real abuse occurs, through acceptance and allowance of the mind. So that is what you say to them. You show and teach what the separation is and you show the pa...

 Self-motivation. I want it.  I don't want to be motivated by praise or outward feedback. I want to be motivated by myself. I feel that lack of motivation. I have wanted to be motivated by relationships, by friends, by a partner. I wanted to do things for other people, and in so doing, feel good about myself. But that is not self-motivation. And that can be taken away.  I want to be motivated by myself, and not be affect by the outward forces. I want to have this for me. I want this for me. I want this self-motivation for myself. I want this creative power. I want to say that I am going to do something, and myself holding myself accountable, and not flinching to what others would say to me. Too often I tell others the things I want to do, and then they speak to me as if they are holding me accountable, when I never asked them to, when its really none of their business. And I feel that pressure of wanting to please them, of wanting to have them like me, of not disappointin...

Something that I am observing for myself, which aligns with what someone else has told me, is that anger is made in relation to the past ( or memories). So if I feel angry right now its because I am angry at a memory. To me this makes sense.  When I observe myself I see that anger is directed at memories within me. And I suspect that when I get angry at someone while in person with them, that I am also getting angry at a memory. To me this also makes sense. Because memory defines the knowledge and it assigns value to actions. It defines it within the framework of good/bad and thus also what makes me angry. If I let go of the anger at memories, and let go of the memories, then I am just here. And I can create and move here something new. I do recognize that this point of memories can be applied to many things about the mind. But I do think it has something to do in particular with anger. Where memories are the subject of direction for anger. I am angry at the memories. In that case,...

 Fear. There is no reason to be afraid of anything. Not of death, disease, harm or violence. Fear itself is irrational. It has no reason. The reason we assign to it is that it protects us. But fear doesn't protect us at all. What does protect us is actions. Physical actions are things we do, which can include protection. Fear itself is a possession, is like an entity. It is not an action. It takes over what your actions are. And those actions are maybe sometimes to your benefit, and other times not. But all together it is not always best for all, and thus it isn't best for all since its something that you either accept and allow or not. Thus if you accept and allow fear you know you are accepting those actions that aren't best for all.  Fear is ancient. Its a foundational point of our minds and ego. And it is how and why we can even act within violence. Look here, would violence exist if fear didn't exist? And here I am talking about violence done not out of necessity, ...

 So there's something that I have realized about when people go through trauma. The common response by people who go through trauma says that it changes them. And what I see is that one of the reasons why it changes them is because they are feeling certain things that they don't know how to stop. And this includes anger and blame. And the mere suggestion that people who go through traumatic events forgive their abuser, is already scoffed at, let alone the suggestion that they forgive themselves for the anger and hate/blame that they feel. I suppose it makes perfect sense in this humanity that we are today that we don't know how to go through an event like trauma, and be able to process it and revert back to how we were. Because if we did so then we would remain like children. We would be naive, we would be pure, and open hearted, and we would still believe crazy things like no one should be harm, and all life is precious, and all people are equal regardless of any differenc...

 In the video called the Imagine no Rings of Power, Bernard Poolman says how if you want to simplify things, you can say that there is only two choices, that which is best for all and that which is not best for all.  I can see how it is that simple. That if you make it your intent to live what is best for all, then that is what you do. And the words themselves have meaning because in the vocabulary of man, if we don't even speak of doing what is best for all, then that isn't part of our intent.  And I can see how Bernard lived what is best for all, and how he says in the video that even by the very resonance of him speaking people will attack him because what is best for all is a threat to the way people are living, which isn't best for all, but is of a form of what is best for their "self."  When I wake up in the morning I know what is best for all, and we all can see the same thing as well. The best way to wake up is with expression, just like a child jumping on...

 There is this book called Peaceful warrior, and a movie was made based on it. I had watched this movie many years ago. And the idea of the Peaceful warrior is one that makes sense for me. It makes sense that for one to be a warrior who fights to have that mental clarity, where you have no thoughts, you are unmoved by experiences, and that you are the director of yourself and the moment, and thus what you do and what you produce is much more and greater than others can.  So the act of fighting, the act of war, and even the act of violence, is an act that can be done within what is best for all. Force itself is not inherently bad/evil. Obviously there is war, fighting, violence and force that is abusive and is separating us and hurting others. However the same actions must be taken at times, usually when there is someone abusing that is not listening to words saying for them to stop. I see that as the epitome of being a Peaceful Warrior, and the exemplary person we can be. Bein...

 We have had kittens that were born outside our house over a year a go. They are grown and healthy. And we care for them. And observing them, its very evident that they are much different in demeanor than dogs. And something cats do very clearly is that if something is bothering them or they feel uncomfortable by the presence of something or someone, they do leave/move locations. And I suppose if threatened in a corner they would lash out to protect themselves.  I see this as an important lesson for me. Where I can leave a space if I feel uncomfortable, and it has nothing to do with hatred or anger. A person can have something about them that is chaotic, or disturbing or even violent. Whatever it is, I mean you don't know the details of who they are, but simply the outflow of that you can see is disturbing or uncomfortable for you. I see this is important for me to learn to do. It is a point of self-care. And I see how I do tend to go into anger or hate in response, when I don...

 I enjoy violence. I enjoy seeing the wicked being punished. I enjoy seeing power wielded  I enjoy seeing strong action I enjoy the display of strength   This is an energetic experience. I see it relates to a coworker who was being righteous about the wrong thing an employer was doing. I see it makes me feel good and in control. I see I desire power, I see I desire money as power, so that I can have control. I see that I feel powerless and not in control right now, since I don't have much money. I see how the idea is reinforced in me that I just need to make more money.  real power and control comes not from money, comes not from violence, comes not from dictating others how they should be, not from screaming, not from yelling, not from ownership.    Real power and control is aligning here with the breath and the physical. Because at any moment the body could eject you. At any moment you breath could be stop. You don't have control over anything really. Eve...

 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto an identity  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto a story of who I am  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto a memory of what happened to me  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto an experience I went through  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto a relationship I had with another  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto a desire for an experience for myself Basically if I were to write it all down there would be endless pages of things, of experiences that piled together have defined who I am today. And they are intrinsically tied to the relationships I have with people. But none of that matters. The relationships I have or had with people don't matter. They are ideas. They are opinions. And they are energies. And none of that matters.  What matters is the phys...

Something that defines much of humanity is Sex. For women it manifests mostly as being noticed/seen. The more often a women is looked at and noticed by men, the more they feel better about themselves. And the primary reason why men are looking is because of the sexual energy they feel. So then women play on that point into the extreme of earning money through offering men something to look at. You see that everywhere, including the internet and social media.  Now, the lesson that must be taught and learned is how to express yourself sexually in a way that is empowering and supportive of humanity. It is supportive of your partner, and it is supportive of yourself. Because if you have that within you then you are not attracted by the image of women. And thus women can also stop playing the game of making themselves feel better or making money through this way.  This is something everyone needs to do. This is balance and correction for the whole of humanity. This is breaking the ...

 Vaccines are safe Its basic science/statistics. You see how people respond from having vaccines. You collect the data and you see the results. Simple.  A world that is best for all is possible.  You can see how people behave when they don't have access to money and when they don't have access to support. Its also something to observe. If someone has the money they need and is supported, then they naturally want to support others and help how they can. Then helping/working becomes a natural thing to do. It has meaning and people's lives have meaning. Change happens through groups. The power is in the people. We are all the points that power everything. And so we have the responsibility. Animals, nature, earth, the sun doesn't have choice. We as a group are deciding what happens everywhere.  Passion is an extension of Life. How deeply you are connected to life reveals yourself. Those who don't know themselves tend to chase money, because you need it anyway right? So ...