Yogan's Journey to Life

Self-forgiveness I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be sad and depressed over losing a friend I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be hopeful that they will return one day I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be angry that they blamed me I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for them leaving I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be tired I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about them I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to be free of my reactions about them no matter the cost I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define and expect all relationships with people will end in the same way as them I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel hopeless and depressed that I couldn't do or say anything to keep someone from leaving I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be inadequate and blame m...

Creating a Relationship of LOVE.....  in order to get the SEX. Making a relationship with another human being on the premise of LOVE.... so that I can get to have Sex with them regularly. Convincing them that I love them and want a long term relationship with them...... so that I can have sex with them as the Reason why. The reason why I create a relationship with a person and tell its for Love, and that I love them.... is to make them agree to sex. I speak loving words to a person, and make them feel like I love them, because I want to have that physical sex, because sex feels meaningful, and it gives my life meaning. The truth of Sex is that it is meaningless entertainment. Sex has no meaning. Sex is meaningless. There is no meaning in sex. Sex is only temporary entertainment. Sex does not deepen a bond between person. Sex does not make one reach higher planes of consciousness. Sex does not make a relationship stronger or work. Sex does not bring two people together....

Friend To be a Friend The Tv Show Friends Its quite something, quite a word. This word came up in my life, and some really dark reaction was here. Its resonance its still here. Its still haunting. Its what my last blog was about. H auntings of Love . The phrase that got me triggered was "Thanks Friend" And I had said a really warm message. Basically how I heard it was an emphasis on the word FRIEND as in, back off!!!  You are too warm, you are smothering me, I am uncomfortable right now!!! So the flood gates opened up and all of it came rushing out. All the past, all the zombified memories still within me roaming around. So while I did work on some dimensions and in correcting/aligning the point more within me, I see that it would be a very juicy and fruitful method to focus on the word Friend. So to opened it up. Redefine it. Play with it, and use it, speak it. So that's my intro and here goes. How I have used the word so far is in very casual use of th...

Something I had done which was a mistake was to write out what my perfect/ideal partner would be. I didn't realize it at the time that I was making a mistake, and supporting separation between me and other people I meet. To understand why, let me explain. When we meet people it is like a seed is there, we don't know where it will grow, move or bend. It is unknown. We just met the person. So why would we put all of our ideas, thoughts, projections on what it COULD BE, or SHOULD BE, or what you WANT IT TO BE. Why not just be here and See what is here, be here in the moment, make sure you stick to your process, your principles, integrity, and being your best self. And from that, by doing this, something may eventually, through time and participation in moments of being here like this with a person..... something may emerge. And it is there that it is real. It is there and its real because its a process that was walk with being here with the person, sticking to who ...

Sometimes we ask what our purpose and meaning is in life. Our purpose and meaning is each other and life itself. Our purpose and meaning is to live for ourselves, each other, and everyone. To live this life, live in this body. To find a way where your actions will accumulate to improve the quality of life of everyone. Our purpose and meaning in life is each person. Our purpose, our mission, is to live with each person, stand with them, walk beside them. It is to hold each person within you. It is to hold yourself within the palm of your hands. Do good. Live good. Foster life, nurture life. Provide. Give. We can recreate this world so that all may have. We can recreate a town so that all may have. We can recreate the land beneath our feet so that it can provide for all. Our purpose is to enjoy every moment and to spend every moment living the responsibility of being able to do good, and live well with everyone. Money can be used for good. We can create, build and farm the thin...

So I have been reviewing my life and what I am realizing now, within my recent years the point of how I placed my desire of wanting to connect with people, to have social skills, first before what is best for all. So I did just that during the last 3 years after graduating college. I went after what I wanted. So this influenced my decisions where I tried to work within a sales position, to develop social skills. Then I worked at a school, also as part of my desire to connect with people. The result of placing my desire first before what is best for all meant that I choose things based on what I wanted, not what is best for all. I could have instead first placed what is best for all first, and then within that life path I could along the way get what I want. But then when I want would not come first or before what is best for all. So this is my lesson. Also really, in sales, I wasn't getting what I wanted, which was to really connect with people, intimacy, on a equal and one level...