Yogan's Journey to Life

New Audio Recording describing an Experience I had today, and why I stop emotions Divided into two parts.  Part 1 Part 2

I have an audio recording for today! WWW. Desteni.Org

Hey everyone, so I have been opening up some really interesting points in the last 24 hours. There is much to share, but lets takes things one by one. So we'll see if we will get to everything today, and if not then tomorrow. So the topics we will be covering is fear and anger. In my recent blogs I have been covering points where I have been feeling activated, perhaps I should say react-ivated, where I realized I have been in the past years on certain levels of myself in a constant reaction to most and much of my daily life. I can see fear is a subtle and potent point, where once you start out in it, it is hard to stop it. So my investigations in the past 24 hours have covered these points, and now I am ready to share some of what I have found. I figure that we could start with something small, yet an important realization/observation about daily life. So we'll be looking at anger, and being right. Now, what is interesting that I am observing is this particular percepti...

I am fairly good at cooking. I am extremely good at following recipes. I can make just about anything with the right equipment, ingredients and a recipe. I know for others, following a recipe is difficult. For me, I stay focused, and I plan a head, what the best thing to do first, and what are the absolute most critical points in the cooking process, and I DON"T TAKE shortcuts. I do it exactly what it needs to be. And I make it good, yummy! In that sense I am patient/diligent/focused. I rather spend the extra time making something really good. I don't have any doubt or fear that I can't bake or cook something with the right recipe and ingredients. Though I notice how others judge me as a good cook, because they can't do what I do, which is to be diligent, focused and committed. That is all I do, nothing more. I'm thinking that they just want to compliment me to get food from me. Because that is what I see them do to my grandmother. I think that is distasteful th...

So I just listened to Why Your Weakest points are your Greatest Strength life review. I was searching on Eqafe for interviews on Decision. And the title of this interview caught my attention. What I heard shocked me. I am shocked by seeing how the mind has been secretly subverting and compromising me as a being. And all of this without me being directly aware of it. But now, thanks to this being in this interview, I see directly now how the mind has operated, what it did, and what it has kept from me. So now with this understanding there is nothing that can stop me from taking these parts of myself back. I highly recommend everyone to listen to this video because it will help you to become strong again, and improve your overall life. We often wonder why we were more confident, assertive, and sure of ourselves when we were younger. This interview helps you see why that was lost. I was obviously ready to hear this because I was searching for support in making ...

Previous Parts  My story: why I support Living Income Part 1 So continuing where we left off. It was during that time that I started searching on the web/internet for topics/words/phrases that I had feeling might lead me to some answers or new realizations. So there I was searching, and so willing to see/read something new, because what had been applying thus far, meditation, and stopping thoughts, wasn't working. And I was really determined you know? Like that is ALL that mattered, which was to change my experience of myself, permanently, not just for some hours, days, or some moments through some methods. I mean because that is what most of us do right? I mean, let's be honest here, that much of what we do in our free time is to make ourselves feel better for a while. Whatever it may be, be it drinking, drugs, gaming, partying, pornography, or whatever. I mean it can even be something that isn't so controversial, but it is still something we do to make ourselves fe...

https://eqafe.com/p/overcoming-self-judgements-reptilians-part-398 For this moment, I am looking at self-judgment within me. I had a listen to the above interview on self-judgments and how to overcome it. I suggest listening to this interview for those who are interested in overcoming self-judgments, because in my blog, I will be only walking my own self-judgments, I won't be providing guidance in how to walk through it, and if you are looking for guidance in walking self-judgments, I suggest listening to this interview.  So I have been looking at this point, and it is a notable theme throughout my past week and the points I worked with. So it does seem subtle, and now I have a self-judgment.  When looking inside now, this is what I see Layer 1: Nervousness. So first, I feel nervous, in response to looking at me, and at this point.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel nervous, in reaction to looking at my self-judgment. I ...

So what does this mean? For me it means to see my patterns that I don't see as patterns. Here is an example for demonstrative purposes. One pattern is that I suppress a lot of what I feel. So why is it useful for me to see my pattern? Because, when I see that I just felt something, and then I am immediately feeling something else, then I might be acting within this pattern. And so my question to myself is, what was I feeling just before, and why was I feeling that ? So when I ask that question, I look for the answer, and I learn what I was feeling before, why I felt that, and that I was reacting to what I felt. So I forgive reacting to what I felt, because I don't want to be separate from parts of myself. From doing that, I understand who I am in this moment, and so I can direct myself.

Today I was working with the Nervous Energy. The design of Nervous Energy I found to include the Inferiority experience. I saw that Nervous Energy would shift into Inferiority when I would receive a question that I didn't know how to answer. The overall design of the trigger I found to be reacting to what I perceived to be other people's expectations of me. This would trigger feeling Inferiority when I saw myself as not meeting other people's expectations of me, and I would shift into the Nervous energy, when I was trying to meet the perceived expectations. So in real time it would occur something like this:  -Trigger: Someone in my environment (or in my thinking) I perceive that they hold an expectation of me -Reaction: I would feel Inferiority, because I am not meeting the expectation, and I would shift into Nervous Energy as I try to live into the expectation I believe they are having of me. In my memories, I do have instances where some people delib...

Desteni group. - insane, immature, possessed, untrustworthy, child-like, children, crybabies, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think the desteni group is insane, immature, possessed, untrustworthy, child-like, childish, a crybaby. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use reality as an excuse to think a thought over and over, and not stop the thought, because the thought is an "accurate judgement of reality." I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a thought can be an accurate judgement, because accurate judgement would require that the judgement be made without bias, and thoughts have energy charges, which create a bias that is not based in reality but is a learned association of something in reality to the emotions and feelings within us. I commit myself to remove all charges that are a reactive consequence to associating energy to a thought, which itself is made in relation to reality, using words, pi...