Yogan's Journey to Life

 Would you agree that being a person that is like has integrity and is motivated by that integrity and constantly does and says things based on that integrity and that is what drives that person's life, their decisions, is constantly pushing the limits of what they can do so as to live that integrity more? Would you agree that is awesome? I see having that clear picture of "that is how I should be" and living that way I am "accomplished." The integrity that makes sense for me is to live oneness and equality, to Stop the Mind, to Amalgamate with the Physical, to Practically Live a lifestyle and a career that contributes to this Process of Changing Man. Something I knew about since I was a kid is that We have to change as people, that everyone needs to work on that self-change and become something different that is better. And I could see that lack of drive as well as understanding of self-change. The lack of drive being even acknowledging that I should be changin

 Love as self-expression. The way that love has become tainted is that its not lived as self-expression. Its lived as an experience you feel based on what others give you. Self-expression is a decision and it is with your will. And Love would be self-less, meaning you are helping others. So as a self-expression love would be a sacrifice, or performing a duty. It would be doing something that is not really giving you anything directly, but you know is helping many others. And what would be ultimate love would be complete love by including everyone. So including all that exists within your actions, decisions and commitment would mean making sure it is to the benefit of all, and so is what is best for all.  One way to look at is is how one could say they love puppies, in such a way to say how much they enjoy it, but also say they want to support puppies, by say working in a shelter for example. So the doing and the action is what is important, not simply reaping the benefits without actua

 I was in a new home/place and I went downstairs and made breakfast. I decided to express joy/happiness, and so I started singing. Then my roommate showed up and said "why are you singing?" It was not out of irritation. It was like saying: "why are you happy, you shouldn't be happy, you are not allowed to be happy." So I stopped singing, and haven't sung with happiness for a year and a half. I was in a new place/home and I was with a new friend. They were kind, nice, and thoughtful. They were sad so I asked them what was wrong. They snapped at me: told me to drop it. Saying as if ""what is the matter with you," "stop being so considerate," "you are not my friend." and so from that moment I never saw them as my friend, and actually my enemy, which is a bully. I felt betrayed. I miss my friend. And I am afraid of them. Who they are is not who I thought they were. Who they are is pretending. My friend was never real. I am conf

 Fear is a powerful motivator. Us humans have known a life only of energy. We have lived through energy, by energy, for energy. We are consumed by it. We don't know any other way to live. So to live another way would require stopping the energy. Imagine being without energy. Being such a way that you cannot be moved by the actions or words of others. You do not respond or react. Instead you can choose what to do. That is real power. To imagine it and to live it are two separate things. Indeed even imagining it as a person who is of energy, you are imagining in an energetic way. Where the person is somehow energetically charged up to not be moved, to be strong or to be more than others.  Without energy is truly different than what we know. The only future possible for us is one without energy. For with energy, we are doomed. Energy is derived from your body, and its extraction requires your possessed awareness. As long as who real power is hidden, as long as your real strength is su

 I am back from my job again. Yesterday I wrote about my reflections from my reactions to my job/work. Today I was also focusing on stress again, and I was more successful in stopping the stress. At the end of the blog yesterday I finished with saying how I was breathing to stop positive energy. So I had trouble ending positive energy. I tried searching Bernards blog on topic keywords of positivity, and I found some useful points. One point is how the more negative you are then the more susceptible you are to positive energy. So I concluded that the high amount of positive high I felt was due to the collective stress I felt as negative energy during yesterday. So it was concluded that it was already done, so it was a outflow consequence. Another point in one of his blogs was about stimulation and how everything works on stimulation. Both the Physical world and the Mind operates on principle of stimulation. You can stimulate animals, plants, the body, and also the mind. So I applied thi

 On my phone with the shipt app open: an offered order pops up. I am reading it's details. I have thoughts: of my mom saying Yogan you have to take what you can get. Also thought of: the only thing that matters is making money. Which I feel stress while thinking this. Stress is like anxiety. My belly gets constricted, I feel this unpleasant experience in my belly. It's like I have to move quickly.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that the only thing that matters is making money. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to through thinking that "the only thing that matters is making money", thus accept the experience of stress and anxiety, for as long as I am making money, my experience of myself doesn't matter. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think: "I have to accept what I can get"  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilt within not accepting an offered order because I

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlX1ZCpVdZg So I was searching youtube videos of Bernard Poolman and here was one that Cameron uploaded. I presume it was one he had personally recorded while at the farm since he appears in the audio. Anyway, its a group discussion on Agreements, and various people there had agreements. Agreements is like a relationship except one where you agree to assist and support each other to live your best, at least this was my definition. So as I listened to it, something interesting happening. I started to realize somethings about me. And about what agreement actually is. An agreement is truly an agreement, where both agree that all will need to live as self-willed equals, and the two agree to live as self-willed equals as all as one. And Bernard said that is what he did with his partner, and he placed his AGREEMENT first. So I found it enlightening to hear how it is wrong to stand as Unconditional Support of your partner, because what needs to stand uncondit

 When you Forgive another, you are actually forgiving yourself. Have a look: if you are truly forgiving another, then you are actually forgiving yourself for being angry at them, for blaming them, or judging them or something else you are doing. Once you do the self-forgiveness and take self-responsibility then you are clear regarding the other person. So pay attention to self-forgiveness and make sure you have walked it effectively. Before you make any decision, make sure you have properly and thoroughly walked self-forgiveness in the moment for everything within you. If you have some self-interest or some mind possession left within you, then it will influence and determine your decision.  We are responsible for the world. We created it. So we are responsible for other people and the points that are in them. So we do have the responsibility to forgive ourselves for any blame or judgement towards others for anything they may do. Because if you don't, you are creating the consequen

 One of the greatest pitfalls in life is not being who you really are with other people. Imagine a person who lives on their face what they are experiencing. So whatever they are going through internally, they express it in some way. This doesn't have to be some extreme version of it, but it is clear that the person is living who they are on their sleeves for all to see. It is not hidden. It is not suppressed. So they are actually aware of what they are going through internally and so what they feel.  Living in the above way is much better than living in a way where you are suppressing what you are feeling and going through. I suppose as some misguided way of controlling how others see you, so that they don't see you as sad, or mad, or upset. But then you never really know what you are feeling then. You never allow yourself to know or to see what you are feeling. You don't acknowledge it. So therefore you can never work on it, or change it for real.  I suppose there could b

 What's the point of life? Why do people escape life? ...think of suicide? ...lose themselves in addictions? ...stop caring about others? ...how can some people be so lost and brainwashed? I think the answer is that as long as you are not in the whole truth, that you are lost. So people who look like they are so lost, are just the extreme end of a point that is the same for many others that don't look so extreme, but are also equally lost.  One of the greatest illusions is the fight between good and evil. And part of what keeps people in their lostness is having a lost cause: which always places them as good and as others as evil. That is not the Truth. Does good exist? Are you Good? Is your cause good? Are they bad/evil? Is that True? No it isn't, and that is why you are lost. You are not in the Whole Truth. Truth is one of the most important things. In a world without truths, where everyone lies, it would be chaotic. It's commonsense that having the clear picture of t

 Being still and quiet is quite an interesting expression, because if you do so, then whatever is moving in the mind becomes apparent, and chances are you won't be able to be still or quiet. And not being able to accept someone else being still or quiet is a sign of your own mind possession. Imagine a person actually feeling angry at someone for being quiet, calm, collected. That is quite crazy. Yet it happens often enough among people.   Partially there is a bias that men shouldn't be quiet or calm as if that would make them feminine which is judged as wrong for me to be. So as a guy I have definitely been in that situation where someone is simply angry at me for being calm, quiet and non-reactive. It is a very interesting moment when someone is deliberately trying to get a rise out of you. It really becomes problematic once another person tries to get you injured, or hurt physically like accidentally. And I know its their intent on a intuitive level, which I can even see thei

 I was looking at Astrological signs, which was sparked by a conversation between my and my dad. I ended up looking mine up. Something interesting about reading it was that it reminded me about how I feel about relationships/marriage for me. How I am as a person is someone who looks for a true partnership, a true friendship with a partner, and how I have also reached a much deeper maturity and understanding of what that requires now then when I was younger. I also recognize that other people are different in how they approach relationships. And that is fine. But I do know what I want and how I am and how I work. And even how I work isn't the truth or what is right. But it is how I am. And other people can be different than me and that is fine. Something interesting about Astrological signs (based on the minute you were born) is that its like the initial blueprint of who you are. It's like what you start out with. But it doesn't define you or limit you with what you do with

 So by taking responsibility for this world, for my actions, for other people, for all people actually, for everything... what I am saying is that my actions, and who I am can have an affect on everything, all people, every moment. It's true. I can be the way that would really affect/change any moment. Like speaking in such a way that it wakes people up, it shakes them, it brings attention. This world and how it works, and how we work, how I work= it works perfectly in the sense that we can become exactly what is needed. We have the power of creating.  Being a guardian of the universe means taking responsibility for everybody, all people. It is your job to help every person get closer to their self, and the truth. And that is how we can bring about change. But that means you can't get angry anymore, it means you can't complain, you can't get irritated, you can't lose your patience, and your personality, and your limits are also moot. It really means letting go of yo

 One of the most pivotal things that we know we must do is to stop the mind. We know the mind isn't us. We know that thinking and feeling is not our choice. We know that the primary components of any moment is what we think and what we feel. And if we simply stop those two things, then we are free to create the moment. Without emotions, feelings and thoughts we are nothing. And in that nothingness can we truly create and decide who we are. So this is the path: to in every moment in your day: stop your thoughts and stop your emotions and feelings. You will have to insist and keep on pushing. It's the only way since the mind will resist. It will do what it can to keep you in emotion and thought. But it can only do so much. So it really is in your hands. Remember the mind needs you, you do not need the mind. The goal is to be able to stand as nothingness in every situation. Even when you see abuse, even when you are abused. In all and every situations you must remain unmoved. Then

 When someone betrays me or abuses me, the options had been to either fight or run. Especially when it involves a person who is part of a circle of friends it is when I would run. Because I loved the person still. I love my friends. So I don't want to fight them, and so I run.  But there is a way where I don't have to fight or run, and I can honor my love for the person. And this involves basically openly holding onto the fact that I love the person and each one, and I want what is best for each one, and I do not want anyone to hate that person, I don't want to see them suffer, or punished. I want what is best for each one. To see everyone succeed in their goals. To help each one. And so continue remaining in this purity of my heart. Where we can all be friends, and I can love everyone I have known, and support them as best I can.  It is my duty to discover and live the truth, as well as to teach and to show others. Because that is what each one would want: to be their best

 The physical reality, which includes your body, is the only thing that could be God. If you become acutely aware of yourself and how you operate: your greatest achievements, the greatest insights, the greatest actions you have done, is all thanks to your body, and at the very least didn't come from you.  I notice how I wanted to think or say that it was from me, that I did it. But I knew already the truth that it didn't happen because of me purely. In more ways than not, it was simply my commitment to the physical, to serving, to doing what was needed, that allowed for these things to happen.  It seemed easier to entice others and say that it is YOU that does it, that YOU have the power, and while from a certain point of view that appears true, when it is misleading. The truth is that in this physical reality, the physical is God, it has all the power, and it is what is allowing for all of this to happen, so that we may realize our potential of being just like God, like the Ph

 Abuse One of the things that we cannot control in our lives is being abused. In such a moment, you aren't the one that started it, it is something that happens to you. That is why it is out of your control. I suppose its possible for someone to go through life without ever being abused. But then again, you don't have any control over whether it happens or not.  Being abused is like getting punched from behind without expecting it. You couldn't predict it. You could not have known. You didn't have any power or control about whether it would it happen. And once it happens you can either respond to it in a healthy or an unhealthy way. And you don't have control over what is required of you to do it healthily. You have to tell somebody and some people, especially those closest to you and those who know the person. If you don't say anything, if you keep it quiet, it already is the unhealthy path of suppression. It does wreck you. So again you don't have any choi

 I will stand for us all. The one thing that our mind does, and can ever do is to stand instead of you. So because you aren't standing within yourself, that is how and why the mind occupies you. It tells you what to do and what to say, and how come you follow it? You follow it because that is all you have ever done. We do not know what it means to really live. So today I do self-forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the mind to tell me what to do. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to follow my mind's instructions, suggestions, beliefs and views. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to believe in the beliefs of my mind I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to believe that what I hear in my head is me, and reflects who I am I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to believe that what I feel is my own feelings. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to believe that I do not have a choice about what I feel. I forgive myself

 So I stumbled upon something recently. It is about Fear. That fear can be experienced as a positive or negative experience. So the idea that Fear is only something negative is wrong. And because of what I learned about Anger some 2 years ago, that it can also be lived in a positive way, then it makes sense to conclude that perhaps all emotions/feelings can actually be experienced as positive or negative.  This is a revolutionary perspective. As it brings the focus more on energy and how we are perhaps choosing or living experiences based on positivity/negativity, so polarity. Because the end goal of the mind is simply to garner more energy for itself through experience, and it doesn't really care whether it is positive or negative.  A brain scientist might say that emotions/feelings are just chemical experiences in our bodies. To which I would say that if you look at how we actually relate to it on a meta-physical level, then it is interacting on the level of personality, thought,

 What Motivates me to Do what I do is the Truth. What am I? Who am I? What is reality? What is really going on? So take a look for yourself right now. Look at yourself. What are you? Check out your hand, your body. Check out your senses and your experiences. What are you? The answer is the same for all of Humans. What are humans? What are we? We were born in slavery. We were born with the Mind. The Mind and Body. What are you capable of? You can be aware of what you are experiencing. You can feel what is going on in this moment through your body.  What you are feeling and thinking doesn't have to at all determine who you are and what you decide to do. You are what you accept and allow. The Mind moves automatically as it does. Your emotions and thoughts move automatically as they do. Yet you don't have to identify as them. You don't have to listen to them and follow what it says. You can decide who you are and what you do. So the Mind isn't you. What I am is this combina

 I am quite motivated by imagining myself as a child and how I would have wished I was guided. And so one of those things I wish I was shown was how there are people who are evil. And to be able to explain that its a mind programming to feel shame about calling someone evil or using the word evil. And at the same time it is correct how both evil and good are programming and the act of that battle between evil and good is a programming. Yet at the same time, there are people who can't be helped and will simply be removed. Just like how I know there are people that can be helped. Like a baby for example, and how we were all once babies/children. So it happens that a child can be raised with care, or a child can be abused and essentially made into a monster adult. It is what it is.   I do feel shame about calling someone evil or that they will simply be removed, only because I imagine someone else telling me that I am wrong. But that is also part of the whole game that evil plays, jus

 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to only live for myself and my pleasure. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live only for what I want and desire for myself to experience. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want others to like me, because it makes me feel good. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel good when others like me, when they compliment me, when they want to be with me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to listen to others if it makes me feel good. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel good because of others.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to avoid feeling bad due to others taking away that which makes me feel good: their compliments, words, attention.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist feeling bad, and wanting to avoid feeling bad. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go towards what feels g

  One of the most powerful and important moments in life is when you stop for a moment. Like when you use your power to stop yourself.  To stop what it is you are feeling.  To stop what it is you are thinking. To simply stop. This is the moment where you have proof that if you can stop yourself in a moment, then that means that you do have power, and that it means that if you do commit yourself in all your moments then you can change yourself as who you are, you can change completely into a different person, that you can change your personality, your habits, your way of being.  Knowing that this is what is on the line, will you try it yourself? Will you make sure you try your best, your utmost, your ultimate.  Like lets take any moment in any person's life. Like in your life, its full of moments. All of them different. But stopping, it takes the same of you. You just stop. Like stop what you are doing, and just be here, sit here, and breathe. It is said that your mind cannot exist

 Series on Friendship and Family Part 1 So I am identifying the one desire/motivation I have had my entire life, the thing that got me through so many moments, was wanting to have this group of people, be it family or friends, but its of nature where there is fun, adventure, where I can relax and be myself, where I have fun, where I am happy, and where I belong. And in media, in the tv shows, movies, and books, it is something that is shown. Like in the Tv Show Friends, or in other shows like Teen Titans, or Firefly, or Agents of Shield, Avatar the last airbender, Full House... And so I believe it was attainable and I wanted that for myself, and I believed everyone else would enjoy that as well, and so helping others to get that also seemed logical.   So everything I did in my Life had that desire in the background, which is a selfish desire for me to experience. I would have this dream/vision/wish as a kid/child where I would be old and invite all of my friends from across my lifetime

What is the absolute power in existence? I propose that the truth is this: that everything you see around you and also everything you can't perceive is bound by the very substance of this existence: that which makes up everything. And if we don't respect that substance, if we cannot see, perceive and live according to the equality of all of existence, then we will be wiped out. I am also talking at the level of spirits and heavens, or the afterlife. There is no other power than the substance that makes up this existence. So I am talking about the atoms, the matter, the antimatter, or empty space= so basically all of it. That which makes up who we are and allows us to have form. The fundamentals.  The reason why we currently even exist is to have this opportunity to become equals through and through. Can you forgive another for something they did? Can you see another as yourself?  All the stories and all the drama. All the fears and imagination. All the boisterous displays, and

 What does it mean to love everything equally as Life? To see every person I have ever known, or will know, to be equal, and worthy of equal love, and worthy of recognition as equally part of Life, and being equals. To see all as an equal. And to love all as equals would mean seeing the highest potential in all, and helping each reach their potential. It means fighting for everyone. So ending the idea that there is good or bad people, ending the idea that some much be hurt or punished, or some must be my enemy, or I need to take revenge against them. To love all as equals. To see all as life including myself. That we are all Life.  Tree is equal to a man. Any man is equal to any woman. Any person is equal to any child. Any thing is equal to any thing else. And all must be rejoiced, supported, cared for, and helped.  I am you and you are me, and we must help each other. I must help all in every way I can. I must smile and see all as me, as Life, the one Life, that we are all equally Lif

   There is this Challenge with Being in this World. Who we are, the entirety of who you really are, is here accessible for you to see. It requires accessing your entire self in a moment, what sums you up as a person. You can access that point in a moment. The thing is that most of us, like all of us really, are existing in a level of ignorance, where we don't want to be aware of who we are.  The Challenge is simple, to know who you are, change who you are as those parts of yourself that are not best for all, into what is best for all. And by each of us doing this, we each become what is best for all, and together we stand as what is best for all. Simple.  For the eons and the ages there have been people who have been pointing to this Know Thyself point. So basically this is the Challenge and it is quite challenging, and we have not succeeded yet. We are reaching a point where consequences that have been accumulating will finally come to fruition. So that means a great level and de

  Death is quite the topic to look at. I think its because of the mystery of it. We don't really know for sure what will happen when we die. I mean you can have beliefs about it. You can even listen to what others say about it. But all of those are still words or belief. To actually go through it... Its like the first time being in love in a relationship, or having sex, or your first breakup. You don't know until you really go through it.  I see death as being something very important. It serves a very good purpose. Because in order for new life to arrive, other life must leave. That way it maintains a balance and prevents overpopulation. It is also important because it does put an end to things. And having that expiration also makes us care more and gives more value to our actions. It also gives others the chance after we fail for example. 100 years from now there will be new people here. Completely new. And I like that. I like that is how the Earth is.  It also means a new ch