Friday, April 3, 2020

Day 817 The Physical is Quantifiable


"Emotions - together with thoughts, feelings, pictures, ideas – the mind in general was placed within each being so that we are able to be controlled and directed and never stand clear as free individuals – free from consciousness.

Imagine yourself not experiencing any emotions within your participation in this world amongst others? Imagine what would happen when you state I desire, need or want nothing? Would anybody or anything be able to control or direct you?

When the White Light was placed within each being's basic neurological system as mind consciousness systems (your neurology that directs you), at the same time as a generator (to move you) was placed all emotions. That way you are always feeding consciousness which then in turn feeds the constructs linked to our enslavement (systems, the White Light and global consciousness).

What I am stating here specifically is that if you allow yourself to delve into the mind and participate within emotions – you are constantly feeding the mind consciousness system within you, giving this all your power to remain enslaved and controlled by consciousness systems as what you become.

When our enslavement occurred the mind consciousness was placed within each being, the construct of emotion as power generator of the mind consciousness was placed to ensure that we are always able to be controlled." https://desteni.org/desteni-material/blog/questions-and-perspectives-what-are-emotions
 
For the rest of the article you can click on the link above.
 
So I quoted this beginning part because this is what I wanted to discuss: Emotions. So emotions are indeed stuff that we want to stop and be free from. Because they are Energy. Specifically they are derived off of the Flesh of the Physical body, like a Vampire or a Parasite. It causes the destruction of cells in the body each time you engage in lets say Anger, or Fear, or Happiness, or Joy, or any other point of Energy movement that the mind uses. Because the mind is damn specific, and it does uses all sorts of variations of energies and emotions. Irritation is different than annoyance. Anger is different than rage. Happiness is different than Joy. 

One of the sure fired ways that you can consistently support yourself to STOP the emotions and so the ENERGY is by Breathing. Becoming effective at breathing means being able to STOP your MIND and ENERGY and THOUGHTS. Because the Mind CANNOT exist while you are standing within and as Breath and as your body. Try it yourself. Try it at any time, and you will see. Try it when you are super pissed, breath and keep on breathing and don't let up. Because the secret here is that the Mind is completely dependent on the physical, it is so pathetically dependent. With all its Hoo-Ha and drama that it stirs up, its like a fancy light show, its all an illusion that is designed to keep you distracted from one thing: your body. Your physical body is where the Life is, God's Grace is, it is the one point that is the Power source of you. 

You breathe Air, You Eat Food, You shit poop, your body is what power is. It is physical here and real. Its not an illusion, and its not a thought. Why else is the Mind's sole objective is to gain control/possession of your body? Your very tool, the very way you interact with this physical world. That's why it wants you to get depressed an lay in bed all day, that's why it wants you addicted to physical substances like food or drugs, that's why it wants you hooked on Lovers, Romance, Porn, Sex, Bullying, Power, Emotions etc.... To keep you limited from actually expressing one and equal with and as your body. DUH!!!!!! its so obvious. 
 
Express with and as your body and you are free. 

Now this sounds simple, and it is simple for those who are the most simple and pure at heart, this will be easy. But for most of us it will take time, a lot of time, years and years. But it is achievable, and its mathematically proveable. There are only so many thoughts you have to transcend, and only so many emotions that you have to face. There is a number, maybe its 10,000, but it still a fixed number. The MIND cannot conjure up infinite number of content, the mind has only ever been repeating the recycling the same shit and same patterns in different ways, but its all the same potatoe honey! its just been dressed up. So you will reach an end, there will come a time where the jig is up. This process is quantifiable, and who you are is quantifiable. Anything REAL is quantifiable, and look the physical is quantifiable!!! Matter is countable. There are only so many atoms! It is fixed, there are limits!

If you stick to breath when a certain reaction comes up within you, you will see it has a limit. It is a battle of wills!!!!

Who will win? You or Energy? Unity or separation? Direction or Abuse? Success or Failure?
You choose.

Sunday, March 29, 2020

Day 816 My Perspective Coronavirus

So, to explain my background, I stick with science, and physical evidence. Anything that you can see directly and observe is trustworthy especially if you test it rigorously and repeatedly. That is how Bernard did things too. And its the only natural way to determine what is true. Rigorous testing.

So. This video is the best one I saw so far explaining the coronavirus from a medial perspective.
https://www.facebook.com/yogan.barrientos/posts/10222228677092854?__cft__[0]=AZUa26G0nI3l6pWC-sYtz2v2QwiGQWrMzLcyR4AoKoVHrYpBzrGhyXxq_aq6wLBaHKJ9PUYy0HwX_zJjC-KcNQFCY8dSV3_Vjj1TpzAsM3K-eF9qy3es1usGcuaVRPTujS8&__tn__=%2CO%2CP-R

So the key points is that the virus moves quickly, way too fast. That is what the doctors in the front line are saying. The progression is quick from when a person should be put on a ventilator. And the current numbers/guess is that even on ventilators 50% of people are dying. It is true though that most people will be fine, but you have to consider the elderly, your parents, your grand parents, and people with underlying conditions. My personal perspective that I would add onto this is that if you know anyone who has had trouble with Pneumonia in the past, that that is a sign they are at risk.

Trust the physical evidence and work with the practical information.

Saturday, March 28, 2020

Day 815 Escalator of Agreement/Disagreement


I saw this vision/metaphor of an escalator at a local mall, where it represents a polarity of being stuck on this point of going up and then going down continuously forever. Where what it represents for me is people Joining me and me feeling good about that, and then people being against me, and me feeling fearful of that. And its very much related to being agreed with, and then being disagreed with.

So to explain it better, its like in life when you are looking for that point that someone else agrees with you, or with what you are doing, and it gives you that good feeling or sense of someone has joined you and is on your side. Because of that nature of the mind, it works in polarity. So if you accept that above point within you of feeling good in such moments, then you automatically create the opposite, that you feel bad, fearful in this case. So its like then the moments through life where when people disagree with you, and are against what you are doing, your decisions, your commitments, then you feel that point, you feel discourage, you feel weak, you feel that it’s a fight/struggle and what they said has an impact against you. It affected you, and you are powerless to it.

That powerless is being stuck on the escalator going up and down, and not being able to get off. The reason why is because you have to simultaneously stop both polarities. If you just stop the negative one, then when you get off the ride you will be ready to take the positive one, which you haven’t stopped. So you will get on it, and end up back to where you started. So the only way to stop really is to stop both. That is what I am seeing and facing here.

I see how it also becomes an extreme of trying to classify everyone, and every interaction into one of these two choices/polarities. Either with me, or against me. It becomes an extreme.

So with stopping this whole point, this means that when I talk with someone and share with them, who I am, and simply open up to them, that however they respond it has nothing to do with this system of classification.

Because now that I am allowing myself to see beyond this classification, its clear that no conversation is ever about someone being with you or against you. A conversation is simply what is shared. A person may share a little, or a lot, its still a conversation. And that conversation as a product of people is not determined by you only. What you do determine is how you feel, and respond/react. Looking for someone to join your side, or agree with you, and getting that feeling is a misrepresentation of how people are. What is shared in a moment between two people is a conversation.

So whether no one is with you, or everyone is against you- feel nothing, have it not affect you. Simply be yourself, live your words and application. The level and extent of agreement and disagreement doesn’t have to create any level of reaction within you. A normal conversation between two people may very well continue different levels of agreement and disagreement.

You both have to be able to stand in front of a person who may completely disagree with what you are doing, what you stand for, etc… and to be able to stand with someone who completely agrees with you, and not be moved by either situation. That is the challenge and the potential and that is the best choice/outcome.

It should never be about how you feel about the person, the exchange, the opinions. It should be about everything else, the information, the facts, the practical perspectives etc… It is about freedom from emotion/feeling, and its about everything else in Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel good when people agree with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel bad when a person disagrees with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel peaceful, and supported when someone agrees with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel resistance and fighting when someone disagrees with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel struggle and burden when someone disagrees with what I am doing, how I am doing it, how I see it, and what my decisions are.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel empowered, supported, encouraged, to feel divinely backed up, and where I am supposed to be, when people agree with me with what I am doing, how I am doing it, how I see it, and what my decisions are.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I need others support, I need others encouragement, I need others standing beside me and telling me what is right, what is the right choice, and what I should do.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I need to fight others who disagree with me, and that I need to doubt myself when people disagree with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel resistance, and to feel burden when someone disagrees with me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that the mind exists in the polarity where with feeling good from having some people agree with me, and what I perceive as them being on my side, that this must mean I am creating the opposite point in my life of when people disagree with me, that I let it affect me, I am fighting it, and I am in a struggle/resistance inside of me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I need to find the right people, the right team, the right allies, the right group who will agree with me, join me, support me, and that I need to get rid of and leave and banish those who disagree with me, and only then can I act, do and live and be free from this inner fight, turmoil, disagreement and feel like I am where I am supposed to be, that I belong, that I am centered.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that all I need is me, in order to create this center and balance, that I need to let go of the polarity, I need to stop feeling good when others agree with me, and feeling bad when they don’t, I need to stop letting it affect me or move me at all, and simply stand as that center, that independence, that fountain and that structure that is simply here, simply moving, simply creating and working with the information and perspectives from everyone/everywhere.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to need agreement with people before I can start living.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to when someone disagrees with me, that its something I hold onto, and let it affect me and be a burden to my decision and path that I am walking/creating, instead of simply just considering what practical value it has, and what the perspective is, and to not make it emotional or personal to that person since we all have minds and none of us are perfect.

I should live in such a way that the person who disagreed with me, when they die and I talk to them in the afterlife that they don’t see me having let their disagreement affect me emotionally and be a burden for me, because whether they were emotional, or in a programming or not, that that doesn’t have to affect me, and so I need to honor my highest potential and theirs, together. Because that is what they would want.

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

Day 814 Let it be Me

So yesterdays blog was the intro for these series of blog covering this mind personality. https://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2020/03/day-813-dastardly-secret.html
Today I'm going to start with the walking through the detail of the programming. So less fun description and more breaking down the exact programming.

The overarching theme here is enjoyment that is bad. Like laughing at someone else's pain. Bullying others. Being happy when others lose.

So the following memories are such moments:

Stealing a bottle of bubbles from a fellow student in the 1st grade who won it for some achievement. I saw he was quite happy receiving it. I grabbed it and placed it in my bag. I could see he was sad/upset about it missing. The teacher tasked some students to search the desks/room for it. When they approached my desk, I said go ahead and search everything I have nothing to hide, and kind of did this motion of raising my arms and then crossing it over my chest. I felt a sense of joy/pride in saying that, even a sense of excitement to be lying and being so bold and over the top with my statement. I had no idea that they wouldn't search my bag, I don't know how or why I thought I would have gotten away with it, I just acted in that instant.

Later at home I showed my brother the bottle and told him that I stole it. I feel fear now in telling this story, which is the point of suppression. I hid the memory away and especially the point that I felt happy, excitement in doing something I am not supposed to. I similarly stole something else in a summer camp. I only stole a few times, but that doesn't excuse what I did. Though because it was so infrequent, it wasn't a point I considered a pattern or a big deal. Because I wasn't stealing now or in my adult life. It felt like something took over that moment and it was very specific to those moments. I can't explain it.

There is a story my parent told me that my brother and cousin were annoying me and I had taken their heads and hit them together. And they told me that story with pride of me. Though now I can see the remants of that memory from my perspective, and I see I did it just because. I walked up behind them, grabbed their heads and hit them together. They were not provoking me in that moment. I did it out of the blue. They started to cry. We were quite young, maybe 4-5. I didn't feel bad at all, I felt good, right, and fun to get away with it. I feel like I did it because I knew I would get away with it. This is a similar themes in a lot of things I did like this: bad things that I could get away with.

When I was in the elementary school, our music teacher had us sing happy birthday as an audition to the choir. I sang it, and he said it was very good, and he asked me if I would like to join the choir and I said no. And I remember how I was smiling or happy in saying no. Like the act of turning him down, and the thought that he wanted me to join. Logically and rationally I was telling myself that I couldn't join because I had to study and get good grades, but emotionally I could see that I felt good. So that was my secret reason and motivation. And it is a point of self-sabotage, because I am turning down opportunities while feeling good doing so because I like turning people down.

There was a crush I had for like 2-3 years in middle school and she called me telling that she knew that I liked her and I basically rejected her. She said she knew I liked her and I cut her off in mid-sentence and said that I thought that in a few years she would mature and that we could go out. Rationally in my head I told myself and kept telling myself over the last years of my life that I did it because I was too scared of her rejection, which may be partly a factor, but here I can see I did enjoy rejecting her. I enjoyed being the one to tell her no.

I remember when I long time friend had called me, I was 14 or 15 and we hadn't talked in a few years, and I was very rude, he said something and I just responded out of the blue in this nasty way. I liked it. It sounded like a character, it sounded like it wasn't me.

I could keep going for a while with these memories. So I am going to work with these first.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to steal something from someone else cause I could see how happy it makes them, and I knew if I took it they will be upset.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to enjoy stealing something and getting away with it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to enjoy abusing other's belief that i am a good boy and so they wouldn't suspect me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to enjoy having the power over others emotions/feelings by knowing what will trigger them, and then doing it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear speaking the truth of what I felt and what I did, and seeing and living the truth here with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress the past and the memories of what I did and what I felt.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel excitement and fun from triggering someone else's emotions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel pride in being regarded as an angel and a good boy by my parent.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hurt my brother and cousin because I knew I would get away with it, and my caregivers would see me as defending myself out of retaliation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel good, right, and fun as energy when I hit the heads of my brother and cousin together, and get away with it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to smile when I told my music teacher that no, when he asked me if I would join the choir.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel happy and important when I am offered something and to feel even happier when I reject it/turn it down.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel happy/exhilarated to think they want me to join and that they will sad if I don't, and that I turn them down anyway.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use rationality and reasons to hide that what i am feeling and what my motivations are in rejecting others and opportunities, and so creating a pattern of self-abuse.

Why do I feel good doing these things?
Why do I feel good telling my music teacher no?
Why do I feel good in stealing the bubbles?
Why do I feel good hitting the heads of my brother and cousin?
I remember liking showing my brother the bubbles I stole. I felt pride in acquiring it, getting it and using it. I liked bubbles. I didn't want to change my schedule of my life by joining the choir, I wanted everything to stay the same. I like hurting my brother and cousin and getting revenge on them from the past. I acted on my desires. I followed my heart's desire. I didn't compromise. I wasn't doing something I didn't want to. I did exactly what I wanted to.

There is something pure and real there, because my smile and happiness is in a sense, real. 

So what I have to sort out is what I want. And honor that point.

So what I am thinkign here is I do have like this desire system or want sysem where its all the stuff I want, right? So I then go after it and do it. SO that doing it is a system. ANd so I have been suppressing that entire point, so I have suppressing as well going after what I want.

And instead I should have just been editing and focusing on what I want and editing that and changing that, not just suppressing the entire thing out of guilt. And so I basically been caring around the desires of a 7 year old or whatever, of a child.

That is my theory.

I took a break from writing for an hour, and I attempted to access and live my desires that I had from 7 years old. To play around, to enjoy life, to prank, to laugh, to enjoy the moment, and I was able to do it. I haven't been happy for the last year. And so being able to do that means something to me. So I think this is it. And when I looked into my eyes they look normal. So I need to access and live my happiness, and sort out this point. Remove the point where happiness is basically corrupted, and feeling happy about the wrong things or abusive things. I need to reclaim myself.

So I think my theory was right, sort of. It is important to have happiness in your life, that is part of living, having fun is part of the balance of Life. And it showed in my eyes.

This system I have been living with has corrupted happiness. Its my job to fix it. Its my job to own it. Its my job to create balance again. No more secrets, no more suppression. Just let it only be me.

I want a world where every child is completely supported and empowered. I want a world where we can step outside and every person you meet is living their full expression and you can join with them in expression. I want a world where everyone is taking responsibility for themselves and we can join together in both work/responsibility and in play/fun expression. I want to have those who are willing and ready to work towards this goal, towards creating this world by being the example themselves of people willing to give/work and willing to play/express. To be that responsible adult as well as be a playful/expressive child, because that is what is needed= balance, because how else are you going to lead others into balance.

Monday, March 23, 2020

Day 813 A Dastardly Secret

There is a very interesting mind system that seems best described as a personality within me. The reason why personality is because its basically like a person or has a personhood to it. It has a flavor and it has a presence to it. And its a personality within me because its like Dr Jekyll and Mr.Hyde, its something hidden, and when it is here it is like I am a different person.

The reason why I am making it seem so dramatic or so extreme is because it is. Because when I started to open this up really, I was suprised/shocked yet at the same time not, that I was laughing and smiling about things which I would never do. So what I am saying is that its not something I was conscious of, to extent of being fully aware enough to even say it exists, or even say it is how I am describing today/now/above, like with the words of it being a personality within me, it being like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I didn't see it like that at all. Until now.

What is interesting is now I have that awareness where I can describe it and it does make sense. A thousands different puzzle pieces, a thousands different memories/moments all pointing to the exact same conclusion. It finally makes sense.

Would other people believe you? I don't know, I guess it depends on the person. When I say that I have a part of me that enjoys seeing others hurt. Like a smile that moves across my face. How many times have I done that smile, with how many different moments and people. So many. The pleasure of being right, but more so, the pleasure that others are wrong, and keeping it a secret. Pretending to be good. Would anyone understand this? I know already that its just a design that feeds off of energy, much like the demons in the dimensions, they simply followed the program of consuming energy. Their acts weren't good or bad, morality doesn't exist in that sense. They simply followed the program. So when I laugh or smile at someone else losing a game, when I hide that pleasure and it creeps up into a smile, that's me hiding what I feel, yet feeling it. That's baking my cake and eating it too, the dastardly devil, something to admire.

I could describe a thousands different such moments, or so the stream of examples appear so easily to arise without much effort/time.

But more so than that, I know that with something this juicy, correcting the point is going to have a juicy outcome, because I can see the change in my face, eyes and smile, this is how I should be: Happy. And so my happiness is also trapped within this point. And not only that, my ability to be vicious, cruel, is also trapped, instead of playing boyish games it could be used to aid others and myself. How far will this bring me?

Its like having all the keys dropped on your lap, all the treasures laid in your home. What changes will this bring in my life? What changes will occur this next year? Time will tell, yet it many ways the outcome is already here.

Friday, March 13, 2020

Day 812 Time to Recreate myself

Time to Recreate myself again.

I see now that I have been developing and participating a desire to have someone else like me around. Someone that I can talk to in depth and detail about the mind, about all the details. all the dimensions, all the aspects and observations as if it was a fascinating scientific pursuit or study. To be able to share and make cross-referencing with that person regarding any and all dimensions of the mind/body and our experience. To discuss the techniques and methods used, as well as describe the mind system, treating them as universal things to study/catalogue and so share and discuss as something mutual and applicable to all of us.

SO I was developing that desire. And desire means energy. Desire are system. All desires are system as long as they operate within energy. Its possible to make a decision about what you want or go after it, all without energy within it or behind it. That is not what I was doing in this case. I had a life long desire, that spanned many years. A desire to have that level of communication with someone else where I could discuss the mind and these techniques on such an equal level.

I can see how within creating this desire as energy that I also was creating simultaneously the opposite energy, which in this case was feeling lonely and sadness. And so while I was chasing my desire it felt good and positive, but when my bubble burst and the things happened around me that led to me reacting in the loneliness and sadness.

What is best for all, is that I stand without energy and without reacting to anything that is happening around me. No matter the people, the place, the situation, I am responsible for my reactions. I am not however responsible for other people and their process/actions/reactions, as I cannot directly intervene in their choices. But how I am, how I live, what I do, and what I say is my responsibility, every cubic inch/centimeter of this body is my responsibility.

So what this means is that when I reacted to desiring someone because I desired to have that level of communication, that was me creating consequence and separation from myself. When I reacted within loneliness, I am responsible for that. I am responsible for my diminishment, for my actions, how I lived, and how I reacted. 

It doesn't matter the state of the world or people, or the state of my life. I am responsible for me. And that is why all energy must end, and we must take back our choice and so our responsibility and the ability to act/do/create what is best for all in all ways, and all places.

It is time for me to be painstakingly and annoying so damn open and so damn honest and so damn specific again. To describe in detail and open up my mind and process for everyone, so that it can serve as a cross-reference and so information that can be used in a practically beneficial way to support us all.

Because we are not desire. We are not loneliness. We are not that. We are each other. We stand as one and equal. And there is no reason to be lonely or desire ever, because all is you.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel desire to have someone that I can talk to about anything/everything

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to not be alone

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel lonely

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel sad

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to not feel alone

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to have a open/detailed conversation with people

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from communication with people

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from my body

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from others

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from what is here

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for another who I believe can fulfill my desire of being able to talk about things in detail and openness and be understood without confusion

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up on ever finding a person to talk with

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not make talking to people a point of desire/search for the one I can talk with, but to simply accept what is here without desire, without pulling it in or pushing it out.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not simply have accepted 'what is here', 'who is here', 'how they are', and so work/be/live from that starting point of what is here.

Nothing and no one can ever replace me and what I can offer to others, and give of myself to all as equals as another me.

Wednesday, March 11, 2020

Day 811 Economics/World

This is an economic/world system post.
So I read this article that interviews Chomsky.
https://jacobinmag.com/2020/03/noam-chomsky-bernie-sanders-reform-labor?fbclid=IwAR1lqwspL2ZVDyh8NX_xhlLLr9KGx4HTUhX6bRqoApbiX48UW9BhY2BW3W8

So Chomsky is pretty old now, and he along with several others figures I can name: Bernie Sanders, Chris Hedges, are all old together. And they all throughout time fought for the truth: not for money or fame, and not for conspiracy theories.

So basically I am saying I trust them because of their life long commitment to the truth and you can see it in their actions. There are not many people that I can say I trust to deliver on their word/promises and with what they say being true.

So in the article he touches on and briefly introduces the point of what has been happening in the world. There is a class warfare as he called it. Or a corporation warfare or business warfare, where corporations and businesses have actively fought to suppress workers and to remove the already existent social supports.

This is all like a giant chessgame and it is about being ruthless and greedy. The problem extends fairly far into every home and person. Apparently the last major reform: 'the new deal' where social security was introduced, happened because people were super aggressive, 'militant' as Chomsky put it. People were organized and they demanded policy changes. In addition some of the corporations, the technological ones, supported the movements. And all of this rose out of the Great Depression. People lost confidence in capitalism and corporations, which makes sense given the market crashed and people were desperate. They realized they couldn't depend on businesses/corporations, for even basic survival.

Now if we look at this globally. America is filthy rich and so workers are definitely placated currently.

But it goes deeper than that. Specific groups of people are placated, and specific groups of people have been brainwashed to fight on behalf on corporations. So really, what will be needed to ignite this fire of change will be a crash of the economy, like how coronavirus is doing.

There are other solutions besides that however.

Currently the human being is easily brainwashed, but what happens if they aren't so easily brainwashed? What if its on a spectrum? What if they could be helped a little bit? What if they can be slowly pushed to develop the skills/techniques so that they do reason more, they do hear more, they do pay attention more?

Because in the end the Brainwashing occurs through Words/Images/Content, and but finally it starts with the moment energy is formed in relation to the Words/Images/Content. If you teach someone to even have a mild amount of control over Energy, it can have an effect to an extent. If anyone were to apply it absolutely, they would be free, 100%, but that is another journey that will be specific to the few people that can actually do it.

Money makes the world go round. Its time to make money equal the value of Life.

Monday, March 9, 2020

Day 810 The Greatest Purpose to Live for

The greatest purpose that you can live for is life. And the greatest kind of person you will ever meet is someone who lives for Life, and understands that intrinsic value/nature of all Life.

Too often has humanity fallen. Individual people and groups fall. Societies fall, nations fall. Ways of living fall.

There is always consequence for that. There is always a price to pay for everything you do and choose, no matter how small or how big you may name it.

The greatest value and worth that you can own in this life is who you are, and it is the only thing that exists after death. All your memories, all your money, all of your good times, bad times, all of the suffering/pain/abuse, al of that will end at death. You don't take any of that with you. What you do take, the only thing is Who you Are.

And nothing and no one can affect that, determine that or decide that but you. And you will live for eternity with that point of who you are.

Everything you do, everything you say, everything you write= matters. All of it.

This a scary realization for many, because they know what it would mean. That they believed that they could get away with it, that they could abuse/lie/cheat, that they could harm, including harming themselves, including giving up on themselves and giving into addictions.

There are so few of us who will initially be the ones who can actually lead others, educate others, and show others the way. Very few. But for the first time there is a real chance for everyone. We have always been responsible for who we are, that can never be changed. But to really create the world as a socialistic utopia, that is pure equality, purely democratic, purely Good and Pro-Life, that is finally possible.

Life was always going to have the last say. There are many ways it can happen. Who we are, and what is going on now, is simply us. We are the ones that will leave a legacy, leave the seeds, pave the way for many more. Its not how we could have imagined it, its not stupendous or glorious. It is simple, mundane, ordinary and humble.


Saturday, March 7, 2020

Day 809 To Do List- Grand Scheme

So here's a bit of a to do list. These are major projects. I will outline what they are, what they would do, their intended effects, and obviously its all tied here to Desteni, What is best for all, oneness and equality in some way.

If anyone wants to steal these ideas, go for it. Make it happen

A fictional Book Series
Its a series where it describes that utopia where there is some other kind of system, could be basic income, living income, or Equal money system (maybe a different book for each one?) Basically its a novel, and so you are following a character, I imagined her as female and fairly young. Maybe 13. That age is always such an interesting time period of life. Anyway, the structure I have is that there is a point where the utopia world she lives in is described by her living her ordinary life, and so the details are there, they are hinted at and alluded to so that you can get a sense of how the world/country/place works. It may not necessarily be the whole world, at least in one version of the story: it could be a country.

But in the in original version of the story I had was that the whole world is sorted out, and it is that utopia. Notice how much this contrasts with the common themes of today of 2020s where you have apocalyptic stories and dystopias etc... How can anyone have a vision of anything different if this doom and gloom is all there is? That is how and why this book would be handy.

Anyway the plot of the book would be she somehow finds a time machine or gets sent back in time to our present day world, and the first encounter I imagined was imagining this young girl get transported like in the alley of some city, like New york, and she sees people walking by a homeless person, and she makes this terrible cry/shout, the most dreadful sound of sorrow of like expressing: how could this be? All of these people walking by ignoring this person who is decrepit, physically suffering, Expressing what kind of world/people is this? ALl in one shout, like ""OH NO!!" I have the vision clear in my head, but the sound should make your gut wrench, and you feel the guilt and the purity of a child seeing one homeless man through her eyes, and we realize how cold, numb, we have all become in present day, here in real life. We all should be expressing like this girl at the horrors of the world, and at ourselves for becoming this way.

A video Game with Basic Income/Living income or an Entirely new/different money system
So video games are powerful, and if it reaches a lot of people, just like a fiction book, it can make a difference in giving that different vision. So I imagine some kind of game that involves some economy or flow of money, and so it could be something like the sims, where you are living a life/job and could have a family etc... So its just like what it sounds, you see a different way how many could operate. And you introduce some of the challenges and questions like how do you deal with crime or other challenges/troubles.

A 2nd related idea is having something like simcity where how do you work as a public official, in such a system, what would politics be like in that? Obviously I envision them as servants more, and they aren't rich, just smart people following the orders of the people within what is best for all.

Other themes to explore above would be Wars Military, how a country could exist as Living Income while others aren't= the interaction of imports/exports and a countries currency. How money works/flows. The importance of democracy and the will of the people. 

Sunday, March 1, 2020

Day 808 Becoming the Devil

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing emotion and feelings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing others to stay in emotions and feelings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abandon others to their illusions, delusions, and emotions/feelings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not try to help others walk out of their mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up on helping others leave their lies, illusions, enslavement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place any value above the individual freedom of each person, where I must help them to walk out of my mind, and where I have been valuing different things like my status, my reputation, my perception by others, my wealth, my anything.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think anything could matter more than helping someone walk out of their mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think there could be a reason to not support someone out of their mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being the devil.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being the beast.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that anything of this world that humans have create as society could actually have value, where if the society or world labels you a certain, like it would even matter given that the world is currently one where no one stands without mind, emotion, feeling or thought.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that there could be something for me to achieve or receive from this world system that would be of value.

I choose the process of becoming life: of standing without the mind, and standing within how life should be: equality, over everything else, over reputation, over being a good person, over the opinions of judgments of people who don't stand within the same process as me: of life. 

When I Be the Devil/the Beast, I am actually becoming Life. Because from the perspective of the World System, and those brainwashed in it, I would appear like a Devil to them. I would Appear Evil, because that is how their system is designed. When its actually the opposite: Evil = Live backwards. Because if you were to design a way for someone to be trapped, you would want to place the actual solution to be in the most extreme place, as far away as possible to them.

So I must find it to be a compliment then to be seen this way, its actually a testament to all I have done and all I can offer/do/say.

Its like I am standing in two places at the same time: my inner reality where I see the truth of me and I call myself Life. And in the place that is the world system which consists of others perspective of me, which would be seeing me as a beast/evil.

Because I am gaining more awareness of people, and of the world system, I am part of that awareness/understanding now. Its no longer just my personal process, its the process of all of us. So its seeing how the enslaved see their support/solution, as a threat.

And so its reconciling all of those points as me. I am that. I am a threat, I am beast. I am a devil to them. And I am the solution. I am the support. I am the words/perspective that if they embrace/live they will see and walk their path.

Because what I offer is equality. Complete equality with all definitions, all reality, all words, all existence, all possibility. If you walk this equality point, you will be free, and you will also eventually reach a point that you too will have to help others to change.

There is nothing in this existence, no being, no entity, no god, no thing that you are not equal to. You are equal to that, and it is through your redefinition and living up to the words does that become so. Just like for me, its a process and its a placement of words as myself that I then Live up to. Because I am equal to life, and life is not meant to be chained down/suppressed/hidden. Life is here for all to see, to express, to live, and to offer life to all.

I commit myself to stand in the shoes of the Demon
I commit myself to stand in the shoes of the Devil
I commit myself to stand in the shoes of the Beast
I commit myself to stand in the shoes of the Life.

I commit myself to give up a quiet life.

Whenever I have the chance to speak, I have the choice: will I be the devil or not?
I chose the devil as Life

Thursday, February 27, 2020

Day 807 Being Silent about what you are Working with

I have been applying a practice of being Silent with points that I am working with, when I know that speaking about it would compromise me in some way.

Its like I know or can tell that if I were to share this thing I am working on with someone or certain people, that it would disrupt me in some way. How I know? I suppose its the deep intuitive knowing. You just know. So the difference is that now I am doing that on purpose, I am listening to that knowing. And so I am being quiet about certain things, certain projects, with certain people.

We could analyze here the practical reasons and the playouts of why and what happens sometimes. But I think I will leave that to you the reader to figure out and see for yourself.

So how I see what i am doing is that its a technique, and its a way of living/doing things. And that it makes me strong/stronger. Because its about me implementing and creating points for me. And that very success matters. And taking responsibility for my word, my words, my speech, my voice: matters. Everything I say and do is a decision, and that decision can have consequences. So its my responsibility.

I am not all-powerful, I am not free of my limitations. But within those limitations I can create, and I am responsible for what I can create and do, and that it reflects what is best for all. 


Sunday, February 23, 2020

Day 806 Love

I grew up in a household where God is Love. I do believe that for every single person, we have that point that is our absolute potential of who we can be and thus what we would do (because doing flows from who you are). And that potential is god-like, divine, because you are an amazing fucking person. Strong, Courageous, fearless, Expressive, Fun, Creative, Giving, Committed, Impassioned, you Know who you are, Disciplined, Understanding others and your Role, Owning up to your Responsibility, Deep, Flexible, Saying/Doing exactly what is needed, Owning up to your issues, weaknesses, Patience with yourself and others, Diligent, Consistent, Forgiving of yourself and others, honoring your relationships, honoring yourself,  taking the initiative, taking the first step, trying and failing, trying and succeeding, Living. And more.

That is all of our potential: every single one of us. How we may live these words may be unique, and has its own flavors: yet here the words are and they are all the same for us, because there is only one point that exists as what is best for all, because it stands in everyone shoes, and it stands in all dimensions, and it isn't limited by anything. Something that transcends all limitations. That is godly/divine like.

I knew that that is what Life is supposed to be, and who we need to be, and who i need to be. Yet How to do it was always the question. If you are committed to a task, to a journey: you will always get to your destination. So in the family I grew up in and the culture I grew up in, it allowed me to have the seed/vision, but it didn't have the method/way of how to do it fully: something proven that anyone can do that is practical, scientific, and rigorous and replicable. So that is how I found desteni. And that is where it describes in detail how we work, and what the process is, and what the tools are that will get you there, if you have the will and the decision to see it through. 

Because the essence of what we are doing, and what needs to be done is to align with the point of self-honesty where we know that all life is one and equal, and we have to honor all life, and be the guardians of all, and take the responsibility of all points. We all know we have this higher potential within us. So why aren't we doing what at least we can see we can do to get there? Because surely we must understand that we can teach others, and we give to the next generation the ways and the keys to walk better, farther, and deeper than we were able to. Life will always continue and flourish, if we nurture it today, and give our all. We receive according to what we give, and there is nothing more worth doing and giving than this work of Self, and becoming our utmost potential.

And if we stand together, and we help each other in this common purpose, if we are open, and we are direct that this is what I am doing and committed to doing, and I am honest, open, and real about it: then you become really strong and you have a strong group. Life isn't a gift, you have to give yourself the gift by putting the work, time and effort in. Make the choices, and the sacrifices. Its only a choice. So choose. 

A song:

Nancy Sinatra - "Let It Be Me" - Original Mono LP - Remastered

Monday, February 17, 2020

Day 805 A Naming ceremony

You have the responsibility to do whatever it takes to make sure that Real Life comes through. No matter what it is you have to sacrifice, no matter what it is you have to give up, no matter what the dream is, or what the happiness is, no matter who you have to give up, the people, the family, the boyfriends, girlfriends, marriages, friendships, careers or money. You know when your compromising yourself and holding back your potential, no one needs to tell you this.

Do you want a fucking real relationship and a real world where you can truly say anything, be forgiven, and forgive? I mean that's real fucking freedom. How the hell did we compromise ourselves so that we go for the second best, the having the compromised relationship, the compromised communication, hiding parts of ourselves and never being completely open and honest. Are you not good enough for that? Are you not good enough to give yourself freedom, 100% open communication, 100% expression?

Place yourself fucking first god dammit! Then for everyone who can't deal with that, then open the door and let them go. Open a door and close a door.

Never accept anything than the absolute best for yourself and from others. That is real integrity, love and caring. Will you be called a villain? Yes. A beast? Yes. A pest, the devil, oh here comes [your name]... Yes you will. But you won't call yourself that. You will name yourself. The name you were given is not your real name. Your real name is that which you accept and allow to be the words you call yourself: Integrity? Honor? Love? Care? Giving? Equality?

Be worthy of yourself and the words you would like to be called. And Name yourself.

Too many times have I seen people get lost in the lies and their words. Too many times do I see people seek their pleasures and dreams. Too many times have we fell. Yet none of that matters, because in the end, all I have is me. Who am I? And how can I help others?

Because reality moves through you, and nothing can ever really touch you directly, it can only be through you. The more you focus on the Self Self Self, the more you will get closer to the truth. You are the starting point and the end point. You can take on the system. You can do so much more. If you are willing to take that step, and give up all that you were in order to live what was missing. That Real Life.

Give up that which is not real. How else can you make space for what's real? Be a hurricane.

Friday, February 14, 2020

Day 804 Redemption

Humanity has been on a course that it itself has set. We have done it. We have created this life through acceptance and allowance. The ones who are most disenfranchised, the ones who suffer in poverty and under the heel of the system: when they do rise out somehow from that torture, are they dedicated to changing the system?

What is the Character of Humanity? Yes we have created and abusive system, but how many of you enjoy being apart of it? How many of you enjoy the possibility that you too could win the lottery (both literally and figuratively), how many of you enjoy the fact that you could open up a business, expand like crazy and become a millionaire? How many of you revel in the possibility that you could live with so much money that no one could tell you what to do, that you have that absolute freedom, where you could even hide your money offshore, and manipulate politics and steer the course of humanity? How many of you want that power, and so how many of you thus are complicit to the system, a sycophant of it, a worshiper of it, and shower it with praise saying its at least not communism!

How fucking idiotic, selfish, and lost you are. Pure evil that is. That is the darkness that is in each one. That point that if you had the money and power would actually give up your own power and money? Would you actually throw the ring into the fire like how Frodo failed to do in the Lord of the Rings movie? Is it really because they have the power and you don't that this is why the system is the way it is? Or is it something much deeper and much more real. They represent you, and us, meaning that they are doing exactly what we have accepted and done. We accept the system, We accept how things are, We don't get involved in Politics, We don't strive to make a change to the rules of the system.

Are you willing to dedicate your life, your time that is left to everyone, to making sure that change comes through? All your time, all your talent, all of your potential to that point? Do you treat this physical World and thus the future lives of people as Real, and Holy and Worthy of doing so?

The answer is only yes or no, so please don't pretend it could be otherwise, but if you truly desire to somehow stand and find a way, then its here. The way is through yourself. Even if humanity rips itself to shreds, if you stand as your example of what we should be and do, that will gift them a door in the future. Because that Integrity, and that message that we are all one and equal: that is the only way. You can tie your hopes into what will become of it, or how it will affect others, all you can trust is in the point of integrity beyond any consequence, beyond your personality, beyond your individual life or your individual experience. Because pain, torture, is nothing in the grand-scheme of things, its only temporary. You will die, yet what you do and what you give will have an effect. That is all of our potential. And no one can stop you if you don't let them.

Will you live your Redemption?

Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Day 803 Deletion



So stemming off from my recent blog post https://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2020/02/day-801.html ,
there comes moments throughout my day where I am reacting, and I am breathing, and there is a moment where I simply have to decide to Delete a point, or let it go completely, where it is so completely deleted that I am not focused on remembering it or it occupying my focus and attention, yet I can go back to remember it if I need to, but for the most part its not here anymore, its not relevant anymore.

What I am saying is that I am noticing this difficulty of letting go and deleting/stop something so completely. I am seeing how I am holding onto points, where I have already done all I needed to already, and the final step is simply to stop, and let go. Pure and Complete Deletion.

I am reminded of a vlog recording Gian did last month regarding lord of the rings and how Frodo had trouble letting go of the ring. So its something like that.

Its like Deleting requires like a shift or change of myself where it feels like I am walking into a new moment, like the past is truly in the past.

One example of that is fear, and having a fear about something, and feeling it in my feet, and it occupying me and my body. And like I said before, this situation is just like that: where all I need to do is to decide to delete the point and then it changes. Boom. Done.

I can see that primal resistance to deleting the mind, deleting this thought, deleting this reaction, deleting this fear, as if its an insult to someone or something, as if its disrespectful. Its weird, but that's my experience of it.

I suppose the concept of deleting parts of me is scary, because all I will have left is really the memory of it, and what I lived, because in fact it will be gone, no more. I suppose that is inherently something fearful, like deleting a save for you game, or a document on your computer accidentally, or losing your favorite toy. Even if you weren't going to use it, its something permanent. What if I could use it for something one day? What if its a mistake?

So that's what I am faced with in moments in my day. I had a moment where I applied breathing in order to face a point, because no logical or thinking was going to help me. And it came up within me somehow that I should delete the point, to decide to delete it. And I did, and things changed. I deleted the point of even feeling fear in my feet too. And my breathing changed, I changed, and in a way I kind of forgot the point. Yet I know its in my memory, but its forgetting the point in the sense of it not being actively here anymore. It feels like forgetting in a way, and its a pure deletion.

And so I wanted to write this here in my blog to share the moment, as well as to reinforce it for myself. Because I can recognize this as a primal fear to take the final step to let go of a mind point. And I'm seeing What it really means to change in the moment.

An an interesting side note: what I am observing is that there is a common response of fearing or saying that I might be suppressing a point if I were to delete it like this. That is something I can observe within me, as a kind of excuse, or hesitation, as a way to sabotage actually deleting and taking that final step.


Tuesday, February 11, 2020

Day 802 What is something I can trust?

Something that I can trust is the point that we are all one and equal. No matter who someone is, no matter what they have done, no matter all that have done that is considered bad, or good, or evil or right... they are equal to me and I am equal to them. Our equality point is what is real and what I can trust. Because it is speaking as equals, where its like a giant collective, or caucus, or gathering, where Imagine like a giant meeting hall, or town meeting, and we are all there. Imagine Existence is at the townhall, and so all of us are equal. So what we should do is that which is best for everyone, all of us, cause we are all equal.

This point is what I trust, and what I am committed to living, to upholding, to manifesting in this world: which is our equality and oneness. This understanding, this vision, this perspective changes everything. Its like a value, a virtue, or a morality or a religion. It is how you view the world, it is how you view yourself and others. It is a creed, it is a pledge, it is a commitment, it is a recognition, it is how you relate to the world and other people, it is a code of honor, it is a guiding principle, it is words to live by.

We are all one and equal. No matter who you are, no matter what you have done, no matter any quality about you, any characteristic about you, or anything, we are all one and equal, you are one and equal to all, and the way to live, the only way to live is if we do what's for all of us, because we are all equals.

We are committed to commonsense, which means we take care of our physical needs first. And that our beliefs, or our points of opinions, are irrelevant when it comes to whether our beliefs or opinions will compromise the physical needs, and the physical dimensions of people, of yourself, of others. Physical health and conditions are real. Beliefs and Opinions can be detached from reality. So the only point we can trust is in what we can see directly here, and work with here, which Science must align with commonsense.

This way of living and seeing the world is something New that doesn't exist in the world. The words are specific, and it has a specific impact and change if you live them as is: We are all one and equal, and so let's do what is best for all. It implies a way of treating others, where you treat others well, it implies being practical with others, it implies tackling and removing our sense of inferiority to others or superiority to others, it requires changing our world system, our economic rules so that everyone can have, everyone can eat, everyone can live well. It is the founding words of Life itself, the truest Life, the Essence of Life, the Essence of this Existence, where we all originate from, and where we all must end up, and what is the Source of us all. It is the godliness and most divine to live, to become, to apply. It is point that respects and cares for all life without exception.

Equality implies and requires so much if you truly apply it. It requires responsibility, a sense of duty, and purpose.

Monday, February 10, 2020

Day 801 A tough point to walk through

Revenge of the Ego is a recording Bernard did.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNwExWTsSXM

And I see an explanation for something I went through which happened through an unexpected way.

Bernard used an example of a relationship and how in the beginning of the relationship it was pure, and real. And how slowly over time the ego inserts thoughts that make you doubt it. Is this the right person? Is this where I am supposed to be? Is this the right place?

And how it sabotages the whole point. So what i am seeing is that this happened to me, but with my career choice and goal. Because in the beginning I was happy, and excited, motivated, and willing to walk it and looking forward to it. But then it slowly went into doubt. Is this the right goal? Is there something else I should be doing? Are these the right people?

And I can see how it fell apart, and how the ego took me to the point where I would give up.

And like Bernard said that its more advanced than me, the mind is more superior than ourselves. It has more info, it moves faster. This is all true. And he said he had two things: he had Breath, and he had a point that was real, which are moments that reveal themselves in your life: something Real.

So I see something that does empower me specifically is understanding and writing out this whole point. Because now I understand what happened. Its not a secret anymore. And my reactions were all fake, they weren't me sincerely making decisions. They were me reacting disingenuously. All reactions are disingenuous. And all decisions are sincere.

The Revenge of the Ego is specific because it will use the point which would give me my freedom and really make me strong. But Bernard said, the point he held onto inside of himself is what really made him strong. For me the point is that We are all One and Equal, and it is my application of Blog writing- to share and be open and walk the point. Cause like Bernard said: leave a record of at least 10,000 blogs and vlogs so that if you fall, someone else can pickup where you left off, and so use it to help them.

So my career choice would free me and free others. It will empower me and others. It will be a pivotal point of support and change. And so yes the ego went to sabotage it to take revenge. It was my vision for my future, for our future, it was my excitement to do, to give, to live by duty, to apply more, to create something that is new, useful, practical, and empowering.

And I can see all the doubt creeping in. Maybe they won't be ready. Maybe I should be doing something else. What if everything falls because I wasn't doing what I am supposed to be doing. What if... What if... So I can see how the doubt cast its shadow. And it happened slowly over time.

So I will open these doubts one by one.

Maybe I am supposed to have more free time to help others. Maybe I am not supposed to be super busy making money.

Maybe others depend on me being available. Maybe things will all fall if I am super busy. Maybe I am supposed to be more of a leader or teacher.

So what I do is forgive myself and free everyone to lead themselves and create their own lives, and if they fall they fall, it won't be because I wasn't there. It won't be my fault or my responsibility. I won't be personally responsible. So i free myself to do my career, to be busy with that, and so not so available.

"Maybe I am supposed to do some career or write a book, or do a psychology things, or create a project in the system or something."

I let this go, I let go of what I am supposed to or not supposed to be doing. I give up predictions, and knowing the future. I give up regrets about not making different choices. I give up feeling personally being responsible for how things turn out in the world system in terms of what my choices create/make happen. I give up being responsible for my career choices affecting or changing the outcomes of things. I give up blaming myself for not having divine knowledge or divination to know what's going to happen, what's the best choice, what the results will be. I accept my mortality, I accept my limitation, and I accept that what I am choosing is my choice and I have no way of knowing if its the best choice or what's really going to happen. I accept the unknown and the unacceptable. And I accept my career choice.

As you can see, all of my doubts centered around the time dimension, of the future, of the past when I am in the future and I am looking at the past choices which is my current choice: Of how it will affect others over time, of playouts in my mind, and what I am seeing as images and outcomes in my mind, which are my imaginations, but I am taking it seriously. Worries, doubts, unsure, and I don't know. So I accept that I don't know. I accept the unacceptable. I let go of any and all regret regarding my career choice, or any outcome. I accept my limitations. I free myself. And I chose this choice, and I let go of knowing or claiming it will be the best choice. I hold onto the fact that it is my choice, which I make within all that I have access to right now, within my limitation of now knowing the future, but I can see and know what is here right now.

No one knows what the future will bring.


I am scared seeing the future playouts for people, to see what happens to them, to see them fall and fail.

I accept whatever happens or will happen. Its not within my control and power: what choices others make.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the future, to fear seeing what will happen with people, and what becomes of them, as I walk into the future in this moment. I choose to accept what is here, and the future as it arrives.

Lets continue doing what is best for all within this world of limitations.



Tuesday, February 4, 2020

Day 800 Money and Energy

What I am calling the God and Goddess of Reality: Money and Energy.

Humans derive their primary sense of self and identity through the World as what they do to Survive/Make money. If you don't have money, or your position: its like you don't have any identity of meaning.

I also see How people are living off of Energy. Where in poverty, struggling to survive, they still feed off of the Energy of their Flesh/Body.

One of the biggest lie is the good person. Because the good person will not give up Energy, and will not change the System. If this is the definition of good, then it is useless. Cause even in poverty, people fear giving up the systems. We have become nothing more than demons of Energy lost in our emotions, opinions and personalities.

Who dares to stop their Anger? Who dares to stop their Judgment? Who dares to stop their Feelings?

Who dares to stop their Opinions? Who dares to forsake all Knowledge? Who dares to give up their Personalities?

Who dares to say no more SPEAKING or WRITING if it allows any words of Abusing the truth by using an Opinion, belief, or Emotions.

Who is dedicated to the Truth? Who is dedicated to what is best for all? Who is dedicated to speaking Common Sense? Who is dedicated to give up their whole life to make sure that Real Life is possible?

There's a whole world possible if we dare to take responsibility for all that we have become and accepted and allowed. We have lost the way.

Life can be seen and known and lived. What to do, how to live, it is a quantifiable, and practical question. There are no great mysteries or great solutions. All that we need to change is right here. To both change this World System, and to change ourselves, its right here already: what we need. To change this reality requires standing as a group in a point. It takes many people. To change yourself you need the support of a group as well.

Dare yourself to do more than the average person. So you won't regret it later on.

Sunday, February 2, 2020

Day 799 - What is the Future of Humanity's Evolution?

We are all one and equal. Oneness and Equality requires giving up the ability to Feel emotions and Feelings such as Happiness, Excitement, Love, Joy, Sadness, Anger, Frustration, Irritation. Because your current ability to feel such things are all based in Reactions to something. They are not your Decision, they are not your Deliberate Creation. They only exist because you accept and allow it, because you only exist currently as an Observer. You are not the Directive Principle of your Life currently. You are existing purely as someone who is observing and experiencing Energy. Your entire life boils down to what you Feel, and Experiencing Energy. Do you agree with this truth?

Given this, it is shameful, and it is idiotic, and silly, and simply a wasted life and a wasted time, since how many points did you participate in your Life that was merely because of energy? All of them. How many decisions did you make based on the Energy you Felt? All of them. Do you exist at all outside of this Energy? No. 

Oneness and Equality would require you to be your utmost and to take on the Systems of Man and the World System. Are you Able to take on the system while you are merely an Observer, and Merely Experience Energy as your only Purpose/Goal? No, you cannot.

People are not Free to choose, since every person is in love with their chains, which is Energy, which are your emotions and feelings.

To can stop your participation in Energy is by being here as Breath. Because energy cannot exist within Breath. Why is that? this surely indicates something is wrong with Energy if it cannot exist within breath. 

The key to your liberation is standing by the point of We are all one and equal. You cannot feel something about someone if you are equal to them. They are not more than you or less than you. Feeling something because of someone is a statement that they are more or less than you. Feeling something about someone is a statement that they have the power to make you feel something, which is a lie, and a statement that says they are more than you. When the fact of the matter is that you are equal to all. And so no one can make you feel anything, it is through your participation, acceptance and allowance that it happens. You are equal to all. So you see, you aren't allowed to Feel Anger, you are not allowed to feel Happiness. You are not allowed allowed to feel Excitement, if you are truly standing with everyone as equals. What are able to do is to express yourself through your body in any way possible. You can laugh whenever, you can cry whenever, your can sing whenever, you can dance whenever, you can shout whenever, because it is through your body, and that ladies and gentlemen is what is real, because it is YOU deciding to do it and Choose it. It is the Revenge of the Ego that has made you believe that Reactions due to other people are Real, and make you believe that when you decide to Express yourself that it is Fake. You have been fucked with by your Ego, by Society, by everyone else since we are all participating in this point, and so are asleep. But most importantly you have been fucked with by yourself because you placed your trust in something that you can clearly see doesn't stand by what is best for all. You see that, and you know that.



Saturday, February 1, 2020

Day 798- Our Home in the Universe

There have been years of my life where I felt at home with myself. Where no matter where I would be, or move to, I know I would be at home because I had me. And there were years of my life where I wouldn't be at home with myself, where I felt lost and disconnected. During those times I knew something was off and I had to find a way again to be at home with me again. There's always a reason why I would have an issue being at home with me. Anyway, I definitely think that we should aspire to have that point and/or develop that point for ourselves.

So to describe this in further detail, its having that oneness and equality connection with everything that exists. Where in this moment, no matter where you are, or what you were doing: you connect with and understand that the true nature of Life is that we are all one and equal. So when you see someone super confident, or successful, or smart, or talented = you see yourself one and equal with them. When you see someone who is suffering, who is confused, lost, etc... = you see yourself one and equal with them. Because its not about any of these words: confident, suffering, smart, lost, talented, confused = its about the person. The person is what you are one and equal with, and so you are equal and one with both persons. No matter the person, no matter their history, no matter what they have done, no matter what they have said or lived etc... you are one and equal with them.

That point where that statement is true within you, is the point I am talking about. Because I know that people look at how its not true. So I ask you to look at how it is true, and the DAY that you see that like that, then you will realize that is the actual truth, and purpose of who we are, and what Life has the potential to be/become. Bernard said Life doesn't exist yet, and its true. At the same time though, what you are seeing is yourself. You are seeing yourself making the decision to see all as one and equal. That is you that is doing it. Its not coming from outside you or your external environment. You are the one making the decision to see how we are all one and equal. And so through you, Life can be born/start.

And this is where I feel most at home. And with this is where I have myself, I like myself, I see myself, and I am proud of myself. This is where I have integrity, this is where I have the foundation of where to start and how to live.

For eternity, man has been lost, and it will continue to be lost for eternity until we stop and start this one process. Self-responsibility, Self-forgiveness, Self-trust, Self-honesty, Self-correction. Through you life is possible and can be born. What do you choose to do about it?

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Day 797 - Giving up all Hope and then Placing Self-Trust Here

What I am in the process of doing is Giving up all Hope and then Placing Self-Trust Here.

Specifically I am giving up the hope that anyone or everyone will make it in their process, will actually learn, grow or change. Even more specifically its the hope for real connections with people, since a real connection would require that person be real (me too of course), where there is that depth. I am giving up all hope that anyone will be real.

And what I am doing is placing my self-trust here in me, in what I can do, create, and move in this physical reality.

And what I am also doing is that I am going to do all of this Life Creation, and Self-Creation, and World System Creation in the Name of all of those who I basically loved or hoped for to make it, which is everyone really. So I do all of this in the Name of Everyone, in the Name of everyone's potential, even if in reality no one makes it, and all will Fall. Because me doing it, me Living it, Me being the Creation, being the Utmost, being what is needed, Speaking in the Name of Life, and for Life, committed = all of that I do it for everyone, including me.

So I give up the hope, the hope for anything for me, the hope of it being easier, the hope of it being less lonely, and I place my trust in creation, in physical action, in what I can do:

which is what I am doing now: blogging. Which is my participation and words everywhere: online and offline. Which is my placement in the world system. Which is my purity, and integrity in every moment= no matter who is looking, no matter who is witnessing, no matter if I am alone.

I can do all of that above. And within that I can have self-trust.

Understand that Hope was holding me back. Hoping that someone will change, that someone will make it, that someone will act/do, even with me as that target of hoping for me to do/act/change.

The only thing that matters is the Physical movement and who I am. That is what its Self-trust. And in the physical you can always place your trust. The physical is the one trustworthy thing, until the day that someone can live up to that trust and so be reliable/dependable/god-like.

And I have a comfort in saying that I am doing this for everyone. That includes people who were angry, or reactive, or trying to pull me down. Because I know that's not really who you are. And so I do this for you too. I do this for everyone, literally. And within that I do have peace.

May we meet again. 

Tuesday, January 28, 2020

Day 796 The Seventh Door- Our Collective Falling or Collective Rising

I am terrified of losing my purpose/vision.... of seeing everyone fall... of seeing it all come to nothing... to see everyone give up... and to lose my vision of everyone's potential and all that we can be. I am afraid of being completely alone.

Bernard said how its about the collective, and its about the collective rights that are individually applied. And how its not about the individual, but about the collective. The quote is here:

"It is not about agreement or the individual, it is about the collective within the consideration of eternity and consequence. In this the individual will be forced to consider the collective and consequence will be according to what the individual accepts as the collective. UNTIL the individual accept EQUALITY as the Principle for ALL within the Collective. The enforcement of Equality is by no other means, But through consequence, as the Nature of the Collective is EQUALITY while the nature of the Individual is Inequality. Thus understand, All Consequence, All Force are always emanating from the Individual WITHIN the Awareness as Collective. Inequality thus WILL END as will individual rights/choice/free will and will Merge as COLLECTIVE RIGHTS INDIVIDUALLY APPLIED -- thus Equality in practice".- Bernard Poolman

So Bernard talked about the collective. And that word is significant for me here and now. Because for the longest time in the beginning of process: I was motivated as standing with and as a Group of People who are standing as their Best, who are Doing their Best in their Process to become a better human being for everyone, for existence, and correct what has been broken.

And now I have lost sight of that vision because I do see the reality of our struggles and how we could be doing so much more.

My vision and expectation was based on our potential and the potential of the human being and choice/creation, which is true even if no one is living up to it.

The vision I had, and the motivation I had was based on something that only I could see, because it was an imagination. It was not here actually. Yet that vision is our potential as people, and it did motivate me to do things I otherwise wouldn't, to push farther than I would wanted to go. And I did define myself not as an individual or a personality, but instead I defined myself as the Group, or the Group of Humanity- or the Collective that is all, or Existence. I defined my value as such, I defined my fate as such, I defined myself and my goals/visions as such. To yes, Kill the Ego or the Idea of simply Me, living My life.

What I am more afraid of than anything is losing this vision. And I feel like its lost.

The question that arises is why not stand as an individual? Can't that be enough? The thing is, its not. Standing as the Collective is enough.

Elrond: “Ónen i-Estel Edain.” (I give hope to Men).
Aragorn: “Ú-chebin estel anim.” (I keep none for myself.)

I do see myself as alone in standing within and as our Potential, and us as a Collective. But as long as I continue standing within and as Our Potential, and as the Collective, than I will be fine. Even if I stand alone, I am still standing with Everyone, even if no one stands with me.

This is the most important point to make sure is clear within me throughout my days. I abandon all Hope and Expectation for other people, but I hold onto the truth of their potential. And I forgive them for they know not what they do.

I am standing with the Collective/All. My definition of myself is that I am the collective. You are me. And I am you. Even if you deny it, resist it, fight it, or kill me for it. We are everyone and each other, and that is Truth. 

Monday, January 27, 2020

Day 795 Sixth Door- Letting someone into your Life, and Letting someone out of your Life


Proceeding down the hall, I see another door that I fear to go, and don't want to open.

Overly Emotional when something happens in my Relationships- either Friendships or Partners.
I can just open a door and then close a door, its not a big deal if someone enters my life and just leaves. But I can see my emotions, me being emotional about it, as if to say I care about them more cause I am emotional. Emotions don't equal care. Care is not emotional. Its not as big as a deal as I am making it out to be. Just open a door and close a door.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel emotional when someone enters my life and when someone leaves my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel super excited when someone enters my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel devastated when someone leaves my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel it to be rude or disrespectful to say that someone leaving my life is but me opening and closing a door, and I am ready for the next persons.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define care as being emotionally invested and reacting and sensitive to someone entering my life, or leaving my life / opening a door, or closing a door.

 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel emotional when someone is upset and is threatening to leave my life, instead of simply being here and willing to just open the door and close the door where its not a big deal.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make relationships- friendships or partners, and what happens in them to be a big deal and by nature very emotional.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to people entering my life or leaving my life, where I define that as a reflection of Me, Who I am, the kind of person I am, or how my process is going.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to seek some validation for what I am feeling as Excitement when someone enters my life, by thinking that I deserve this, or that this is a result of my process, or that its because of everything I have done and changed so far.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to protect my feelings of excitement, through also protecting my feelings of devastation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make someone entering my life or leaving my life a big deal.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilty for taking someone entering my life or leaving my life to NOT be a big deal, and NOT be something emotional or impactful.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take someone's anger, or upsetness, or pissedoffness seriously and to be a reflection of me, where if they leave the relationship with that reaction that its my fault that they felt that way and that they left.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear when someone is angry at me, because I fear they will use that to say its my fault and that they will leave the relationship.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear letting go of a relationship easily, and judge myself or others for letting go of relationships easily.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as a sensitive person and so by definition I get emotional when someone is angry at me, or someone leaves me, in that anger.

When and as I see myself getting emotional when someone leaves my life- I stop and I breathe- I realize that what is best for all is to be stable and for it to be a simple act when you open and close the door on someone leaving your life- I realize that what is best for all is that eternal self-stability and the ability to support others and be a pillar for others- I realize that all anger is reactionary and so a person leaving a relationship in anger, is doing so within a reaction and so that is not their best self or potential, and that its my job to support them the best way I can, which includes not reacting, not justifying their anger, and not getting emotional about them being angry and leaving, because that would give them a resonant sense that they are right/justified in their anger and being angry is "ok" -

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel angry at someone else being angry

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to fight someone else being angry

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to stop someone else's anger through being angry.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame someone else for leaving me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that they could have prevented leaving me, and that it was their choice.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe/think that its their fault if they leave me.

When and as someone leaves me and I am angry at them- I stop and I breathe- I realize that its no one's fault, because if they are in a reaction then they are acting out their systems, which represents where they are at in their process and self, and so there is no "choice" for them to make, to stay or to go- I realize that since we are all systems and walking process that nothing is personal to others, and things are only personal to ourselves- I realize that someone leaving me is not doing something to me- I realize someone angry at me, is not doing something to me- I realize that someone being a part of my life for a time, and then they leave, that its not something being done to me- I realize that we are all equals and we are all walking this process directly or indirectly, in one way or another way- I realize that until we are all truly free from the Mind/Systems/Reactions then there is no Full/Free Choice - I realize it is my responsibility to supportive to myself and to others when it comes to every moment, including when a relationship ends and when someone is angry, whether its me or its them.

I commit myself to hold my tongue when I am angry

I commit myself to be gracious and supportive to someone in anger and to someone announcing the end of a relationship with me.

I commit myself to stand stable and support myself when someone leaves me so I don't react to it or make it emotional.

 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to expect there to be a great epiphany when a relationship has ended, when instead all that is here is me, alone in this moment, Here with my body: the simple, mundane and ordinary.

I realize that if I reflect on the past relationship that has ended, that I can see the pearls and nuggets of expression that I can integrate and the lessons learned. So I realize that now the relationship has ended so none of that points are no longer Here to be seen in real time, yet they exist in my memory.

"The relationship was real, in the past, but its no longer Here". Bernard said something like this in a video, I think its relevant to this blog.