Yogan's Journey to Life

I grew up in a household where God is Love. I do believe that for every single person, we have that point that is our absolute potential of who we can be and thus what we would do (because doing flows from who you are). And that potential is god-like, divine, because you are an amazing fucking person. Strong, Courageous, fearless, Expressive, Fun, Creative, Giving, Committed, Impassioned, you Know who you are, Disciplined, Understanding others and your Role, Owning up to your Responsibility, Deep, Flexible, Saying/Doing exactly what is needed, Owning up to your issues, weaknesses, Patience with yourself and others, Diligent, Consistent, Forgiving of yourself and others, honoring your relationships, honoring yourself,  taking the initiative, taking the first step, trying and failing, trying and succeeding, Living. And more. That is all of our potential: every single one of us. How we may live these words may be unique, and has its own flavors: yet here the words are and they are a...

So directing another person. I have been figuring this one out: trying to direct another person. Bernard said in a very short chat long ago how a partner has to direct the agreement. Does this mean directing the other person? I don’t know. Maybe he said a partner has to direct the other. Anyway. The point here is no matter what Bernard may have meant or said, I am deciding here and now to not direct another, whether it be an agreement partner or any person really. Especially though in an agreement. I have decided that even in an agreement to not direct the other person. This is a big deal for me, to decide this. I am going to let each person walk their process. Those who have the tools, have the tools, those who don’t have the tools, then if they are ready I will share the tools. More importantly though in an agreement where you are spending such a life time with a person, to not direct the other person. I know its tempting, that is what I believed at least partly believed....

There are many ways to be creative, not just with art, music or dance. Though this blog for today is dedicated to just those areas of creativity. Leaping into the air and dancing like you just don't care! Feeling your body as it moves, the wind, the air, the breathing, the rhythm, the sound of the music or the sound of the room. Taking something that didn't exist before and bringing it into creation. It can be WORDS that were never written or expressed before! The jolly Giraffe soared on roller blades under pink flamingo skies! Art is just that! Creating forms and shapes that never existed before. It is a part of you that is expressed into something new. Music! Creating a sound a moment that is an extension of yourself into the environment around you! Playing a piece of music spontaneously freestyle where you lose track whether you are creating the music and rather the music is creating itself and you just have the honor of bearing witness to it. Doing something, expres...

When two people come together to start a family, their relationship as a couple while raising their kids is imprinted and transferred into their children. This is what I will be describing today. In past blogs I have analyzed described how parents imprint themselves onto their kids, but this was in the context of the parents as Individuals. Today, I am specifically looking at the Relationship of the parents, and how that imprints onto the children. Looking at this specific dimensions yields new insights onto this subject. In the general knowledge and beliefs people have, I have observed people saying that its important that a child's parents stay married and divorce causes harm. I have also heard about research studies looking at fighting, and yelling and general abusive environment and how that also harms the child emotionally, and mentally, affecting their development. Within my own self-work, through the desteni tools, I focus primarily on helping myself to transcend pattern...

I grew up in an environment where enlightenment was considered real. so I expected that through meditation, which meant like sitting in the room and not thinking, I would get enlightened. Where I would be happy all the time, and have all the right things to say in any moment. And nothing and no one can touch me, make me react in anyway, forever., permanently. Looking back now, I just didn't have the proper understanding of how the mind works. Though I tested the tools I had to the extreme. So I saw directly meditation is not enough. That was when I found the desteni tools. I found that self-forgiveness can stop thoughts, emotions/feelings in the moment, and you can move as your body without thought. So its not that I disowned enlightenment, or think it was stupid. I just found the actually way to get there. This is what changed in my understanding: 1. It will happen in one moment  VS You will physically, practically change yourself point by point 2. You just need to stop y...

Self-forgiveness, Self-responsibility and Self-Honesty are tools that provide structure that supports a person to better himself.  For example, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am dumb when I make a mistake. This example uses self-responsibility because the person takes responsibility for thinking the thought by saying that he was the one thinking this thought. It uses self-honesty because he was honest with himself that he was thinking this thought and that stopping this thought betters himself. It uses self-forgiveness because he says that he forgives himself for thinking this thought.  Why and how do these tools work? The source of the power is self or the person himself. So it works because the person is self-honest when forgiving himself and self-honest when taking responsibility. So the person really is forgiving himself, and taking responsibility, which means that he will make the changes that betters himself. When can one use these tool...

Previous Parts  My story: why I support Living Income Part 1 So continuing where we left off. It was during that time that I started searching on the web/internet for topics/words/phrases that I had feeling might lead me to some answers or new realizations. So there I was searching, and so willing to see/read something new, because what had been applying thus far, meditation, and stopping thoughts, wasn't working. And I was really determined you know? Like that is ALL that mattered, which was to change my experience of myself, permanently, not just for some hours, days, or some moments through some methods. I mean because that is what most of us do right? I mean, let's be honest here, that much of what we do in our free time is to make ourselves feel better for a while. Whatever it may be, be it drinking, drugs, gaming, partying, pornography, or whatever. I mean it can even be something that isn't so controversial, but it is still something we do to make ourselves fe...

Setting up defenses. So why is it important to be defensive when it comes to the process of walking the mind? And what do I mean by defensive? So the mind is in its nature, offensive. Meaning that it will bring up thoughts and reactions within you. It doesn't wait for you. So in that sense the mind is offensive all the time. You can see this for yourself. When you make a decision to do something, no matter what it may be, your mind will find some way to bring itself up in what you decided. So it is also true that there is no escaping the mind's offense. It is a guarantee that the mind will attack. So that is why it is important to set up and prepare a proper defense. Why? In various war games I have played there revealed important themes like the importance of setting up a proper defense, which meant placing/positioning your armies in the most advantageous positions, as well as building structures that would give you the upper hand. Because what is one thing that all of...

I have an ego. I judge and compare myself automatically with others. I even judge on how I do self-forgiveness. I judge having more longer or complex self-forgiveness as better. I feel validated when I write longer and more complex self-forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have an ego. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare myself automatically with others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge how I do self-forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge that self-forgiveness that is longer more or more complex is better than a shorter or more simpler self-forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to write longer and more complex self-forgiveness, in order to feel validated. When and as I see myself feeling validated when writing a long and complex in structure self-forgiveness- I realize that doing something that is more challenging, that takes more time and...

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, through compare and contrast, to use the application or lack of application of others in my life in how they stand/change or lack of standing/changing as a factor that determined who I am. Thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define who I am according to who others are or who they choose to be, instead of always aligning myself to what is best for all, and to express myself and create myself in the upmost possible in this one Human life. So within that, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not being that one point that can stand eternally that can direct all of existence to within itself, to align existence to the same point, of oneness and equality, of considering all as one and equal, to essentially align existence to itself, to the actual reality of the situation, to self-honesty, and self-responsibility, to self, to here. With the Desteni tools I can stop any thought and any energy. B...

The practicality of working with what is here, being here, creating while being here. The practicality of here. So one dimension to look at where Here can be utilized is stopping thoughts. Because when your thinking and involved and being one and equal to your thoughts, you are not one and equal to what is here. Now this is troubling because here includes everything, including thoughts. The problem with thinking is we become so involved with and as our thoughts, that that is all that we become, and in fact our thoughts is not all that is. Everything is here. So to get access to everything you must be here, simple, no? So with working with what is here, you are essentially working with the physical. The physical has always been here, but we haven't, so that is why we must stress working with the physical because we don't know how to work with the physical. We mostly learn as we grow up how to deal with humans, at least those of us that become what we dub Successful. Howeve...

So im going to make this blog about reviewing over a helpful thing that I do to support me to stand and direct myself to not fall into the mind, in moments such as video game playing and porn viewing in moments where it is not appropriate. So just to say it, I bring myself to the physical. To be frank, I rediscovered this point within masturbation. I say rediscovered because I have applied this point before but I had stopped, mainly out of fear of this point that it may have been fake or untrustworthy. So it was the mind convincing me that something that was supporting me was actually bad or harming me. So just to talk about the point of masturbation a bit, to make it an little of an introduction, I have been practicing masturbation as a point of being here with my body and directing and moving myself without image or thoughts. So when I do this the objective is to not be thinking of any man, women, any sexual, nothing. So totally no thought. So what I would sometim...