Yogan's Journey to Life

Something that I am observing for myself, which aligns with what someone else has told me, is that anger is made in relation to the past ( or memories). So if I feel angry right now its because I am angry at a memory. To me this makes sense.  When I observe myself I see that anger is directed at memories within me. And I suspect that when I get angry at someone while in person with them, that I am also getting angry at a memory. To me this also makes sense. Because memory defines the knowledge and it assigns value to actions. It defines it within the framework of good/bad and thus also what makes me angry. If I let go of the anger at memories, and let go of the memories, then I am just here. And I can create and move here something new. I do recognize that this point of memories can be applied to many things about the mind. But I do think it has something to do in particular with anger. Where memories are the subject of direction for anger. I am angry at the memories. In that case,...

 So, there is this statement that we cannot control other people, but we can control ourselves and who we are with things around us. So what I see within that is Fear. Because we can actually control who we are with other people, and so we can stand in a way with other people that does control/determine the relationship with that person. Control= Power= Responsibility. Being someone like Bernard, like how he was in his agreement with another person, which is who he is in a relationship based on principles that is openly agreed to and discusses, that requires having that Control, Power and thus acting from the knowing that you are responsible for the outcome. You do it, because you know it has an affect on all. You do it because you know that this shapes reality and changes the course of the future for this person and for others.  Power is scary, like real power. Real power is the kind of power that can only come about when one Realizes ones Responsibility. Power that is acted ...

When I look into my body, I see tension. Why is there tension? Because of I am thinking of other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not be focusing on me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about how I am perceived by others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about how others would respond to me. Is there anything else inside of me? More tension. Why is tension here? I think about failure. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about my failure in my goals. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about the failure in having an impact. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about the failure to have the impact I set out to do. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am a failure. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to t...

I have been applying a practice of being Silent with points that I am working with, when I know that speaking about it would compromise me in some way. Its like I know or can tell that if I were to share this thing I am working on with someone or certain people, that it would disrupt me in some way. How I know? I suppose its the deep intuitive knowing. You just know. So the difference is that now I am doing that on purpose, I am listening to that knowing. And so I am being quiet about certain things, certain projects, with certain people. We could analyze here the practical reasons and the playouts of why and what happens sometimes. But I think I will leave that to you the reader to figure out and see for yourself. So how I see what i am doing is that its a technique, and its a way of living/doing things. And that it makes me strong/stronger. Because its about me implementing and creating points for me. And that very success matters. And taking responsibility for my word, my word...

So, I'm standing again in clearly seeing the Life that is here as me. What this means is that how I see myself is a being, a something that is life- if I create an imagination about it in order to describe it- it could be seeing myself/my body that is right here in his moment as I sit in this chair and type, and seeing that inner body as like a blue light that is my body. Its not about an image, but if I were to use an image it would be that. How I see myself is about seeing myself as life- meaning that I have no beginning and no end, that I am standing with and by every single part, particle, and speck in this existence, from the great to the small. So I committed to support every single part/person/thing in this existence- no matter who it is or what they have done. Because there are no enemies in reality/existence- there is just people/life that may be exercising power in accordance with their programming and in ways that is not what is best. But there is no enemy, there is no n...

Controlling another's perception of me. I choose to let go of controlling another's perception of me. I choose this even if they have the wrong perception of me, a judgment or a reaction. It is the responsibility of each one to walk their own process and direct themselves and their perceptions of others. Its not my responsibility to do that for them, and that even includes their perception of me. I choose to let go of trying to control others perception of me. I choose to not define myself or react to how others perceive me. I choose not to decide for others how they should view me. That is entirely up to them. I am not here to walk other peoople's process. I can give suggestions, yes. I can show the tools and the process that can be walked. But its not my responsibility to walk it for them. The perception that  each one has is entirely up to each one of them. I realize that it doesn't reflect me what someone else is thinking of me, or what they think I am. If ...

When it came to comparing myself to others in where they are in their process. Meaning how "advanced" or "skilled" someone is... well first off that idea is wrong already. Each person develops their own skill in a particular area of themselves... so there are differences, and different skills. And secondly both time spent in process makes a difference. Obviously though those who have walked longer have more experience, because they spent more time at it. When it came to the point of jealousy of someone who is more skilled than I, this is what I did. I choose to see them as a teacher. I choose to make it a statement of celebration: "wow! that's great they have achieved this!!!! The world is better for it!!! They are better for it!!! And I am better for it!!! So it always a celebration when someone is super strong, super skilled, and advanced!"  So with this perspective its always STUPID to react or think its bad that someone is super advanced ...

There are some people who I interacted with briefly and they went ahead and made some choices where in my mind I am thinking it was because of me, I caused this. I never really let it go. I blamed myself. I know that its not my fault. So its time to do some SF. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take responsibility for other's selves. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try to be responsible for who someone is. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I can be responsible for who someone is. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be responsible for the self of another person. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself try to take ownership of another person's self, the who they are.... I cannot, its impossible... I can only take responsibility for my self. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself blame myself for what another person does or decided to be. I forgive myself fo...

What was discovered through the Portal was that the entirety of the Heaven existence, including all the beings that had passed over, lived in separation of this Earth existence. Basically not concerning themselves at all with what was happening on Earth. The same thing is happening on Earth. I am a HUman, I am a piece of this Earth and of Life itself. To care about everything, to care about all that is happening right now on Earth is my responsibility. All the problems that exist is my responsibility. All the war, the strife, the violence, the poverty, the pain and suffering is my responsibility. All the people who live in ignorance bliss is my responsibility. My generational history, my genetic history, my appearance, my education, my past, my money, doesn't excuse me from being responsible for all that exists all across the world. It doesn't matter where in the world. I am a piece of Life. This doesn't stop at the borders of any country. This doesn't stop at the t...

Today I learned that I have been feeling depression as Cynicism and Pessimism that the a world that is best for all won't happen. I felt this way as a reaction to seeing people give up, argue for their limitations, not willing to change, look at a point, or learn from it. It came from seeing people talking about money, and the natural world like its a dead thing. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel depression when seeing people talk about the nature as a dead thing and talk about how important money is. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel depression when I see people argue for their limitations and refuse to investigate themselves further. I also feel this way when people tell me how a world that is best for all is not possible. I also feel angry as I try to tell them why it is. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel depressed when people tell me that a world that is best for all is not possible. I forgiv...

The Power to Change who you are is an Immense power. It is immense because it is impossible in the eyes of humanity. It is God-like to have such power to change Self. It is super-hero. It is fantasy, a fairy tale. Just unbelievable, that everyone/anyone can have such power, not matter who they were, what they have done, who they had been. Some religions are seen as great in the eyes of men because they offer absolution from all sins, all past transgression, a clean slate that allows you into paradise, where God forgives you. What about just forgiving yourself? No matter what you have done or been. What about, instead of asking for God or someone else to forgive you, you just do it? So simple. Anyone can do it. A rapist could do it. A child-murderer could do it. Abusers, violent people, sinners could do it. Anyone can recognize that they have done something that isn't best for them and others and they can take responsibility and change. Anyone can. Its just a belief that you h...

What is held within the word family? What is the information that we carry within from our life experience that is stored within the word family? Your Life Experience, this Word, the Information, all of it will be activated and lived/possessed when it is turned on. The word is turned on with the proper triggers. Your family will always be your family. When you compare how you behave, what you physically say, how you sound when you are speaking as and within the word Family, to when you are not, there is a difference. When you meet a stranger, when you meet someone for the first time, there is much respect and civility. How come with the people we have known the longest, our family, can the really worst of us, the really evil of us can exist? Maybe its because we have defined our family as always being our family, and that no matter what we say or do to them, or they unto us, that they will always be our family, so it is okay, because they love you DEEP down. When it comes to fami...

Solution: If you see someone is reactive, step out of their way. Meaning, if someone is sharing their viewpoint in a reactive manner, I myself want to stop their reaction. But you can't help someone to change if they don't want to. So learning to let go, is a big point to stop the "influence." If you let go of the person inside of you, which really means letting go of your reaction to the person's reaction, then what they say won't have any affect on you. So that letting go, stepping aside, moving out of the way, so you can let them face Life and learn through Life how they need to take responsibility for their emotions and feelings. So assist once, and assess whether they are able/willing/ready for help. If not, then step out of the way. Otherwise, you will fight with them, react with them, argue, sharing your opinions, and keep repeating yourself, and they keep repeating themselves, when the truth is you can't help them, even though you want to help. But...

I want to be free VS. I want to take responsibility Some people say they want to be free from their mind. You can also say, free from the burden of my mind, free from haunting thoughts, free from guilty memories etc… These are all similar to saying I want to be free from my mind. If the above example is not easy to relate to, you can try others, such as I want to be free from my problems, or free from this annoying person etc… Now, compare the above examples of wanting to be free to wanting to take responsibility. Because you may say to me that you want to be free of all of these bad things that are happening in your life, but then I have to ask you are you willing to take responsibility for your life? At that moment, a person will hesitate. Why is this? This is because the person in some level of themselves know that they haven’t been taking responsibility for themselves in these situations. And the real solution to their problems IS to take responsi...

How Desires really work Desires are things you want, for example a desire for a romantic relationship with a partner; Link: The Desire for a Life-Long Partner Test. It seems that when you a desire you would surely get what you want, right? Let's self-reflect on this question shall we? Have I fulfilled my desires and how long have I had to do so? In my life, I have had the desire for having a partner, and I am 26 years old, and so I have had 26 years to fulfill this desire. What I have seen when it came to my mind and my desire, is that who I am and how I am, is not actually built in such a way so that I would attain this desire. For example, being afraid of not having a partner, which itself prevents me from being comfortable and confident which would in theory attract a partner. Yet my fear of not having a partner is a manipulation of myself to push myself to go after a partner. And so what ends up happening is that I end up thinking about a partner, and imagining what it w...

Let's consider the following scenario. A person lies to another person that there is a sale going on in a store. So if the person were to get emotionally angry, physically yell, and think to themselves how this person is an asshole for lying to him, would he not be responsible at all for himself just because his friend lied to him? Who is yelling, thinking and acting? He is. And what is responsibility? It refers to the one that is doing, deciding, moving, and creating. Is there ever any situation where you are not responsible for what you do, say, or think? Is there any situation where any person is not responsible for what he or she does says or thinks? I claim that every single person is always responsible for what he or she says, does and thinks. For example, when someone lies to you, that person is responsible for what he said, for what he thought and what he did. And you are responsible for what you said, thought, and did with their lie. So in every moment, every person i...

So what does this reveal? This image reveals how debt is. So we "made" money out of thin air. So what is money but a decision to have a certain good/service provided? Look at it yourself. You could basically create a utopian society based on the same principle. Simply give people orders/directions on what good/service to provide... that is exactly what we have already anyway. The difference is that if we with awareness create such a society EXACTLY how we want it to be, then we would all be better off. We would have better STUFF, better houses, better equipment, things, better food, better everything. Only because the decisions that are made now on what good/services are provided, are not best for everyone, is it so. So all that needs to change is the decision, which WE can do with awareness, meaning we decide what we would actually like the world to be. I mean people are already doing that already, aren't they? So we might as well do it ourselves, righ...

Understanding your emotions and feelings is a tricky thing. It requires time to investigate them, to understand why you are feeling a certain way, to see whether it is something you really want to feel, or to see whether it actually makes any sense to feel that way. But if you spend the time to understand them, you gain the power and ability to change them into something better that is an expression of who you are. Sometimes you will find that it doesn't make any sense to feel a certain way. Like with feeling irritated with having to wait for something/someone. Because you self-honestly know that feeling irritated while waiting doesn't make any sense, even though you may have excuses and justifications for it. And when you do change how you feel, and stop certain emotions/feelings, your life can become better, where you actually gain back the power to create your life exactly how you want it, and become the exact person that is the best version of yourself possible. And thi...

To care is scary..... it is scary because you have to give up freedom. To care means to be a servant. Imagine or remember caring for something/someone. You had to support them. That is not freedom, or free to choose or do what you want to do. That is being there for them, to support them, care for them. If you want to be free in every moment, then you can never care for someone, or have them ever trust you. Because to care for someone and to gain someone's trust means that you are committed to them. Being committed to them, means that you are not free to break that commitment. Freedom then is overrated because obviously, breaking commitments/promises, is not something desirable for you or for those around you. You want to be surrounded by people you can trust, that are dependable. You want to be a trustworthy person. For some reason, fear exists when it comes to losing freedom. Even if that is the freedom to abuse and to break promises/commitments. Freedom then is something...

So in life, you will meet all sorts of people. Some will be rare individuals that find the nugget of truth within everything that is shared/spoken. Others will be the more common person that tends to hold onto what is their normal beliefs. The question to ask in any moment is who am I in this moment? Because you have the choice to meet someone, no matter who they are, according to where they are at, and so not according to you, or to your likes, preferences etc... So you do put them first. What does this mean practically in reality? That you speak to them on their level, within their understanding and their context of life. You do that, and you don't try speaking to them from your level or your level of understanding and the context of your life. People who have only lived a similar life to yours will be able to hear you if you speak only from your context. Thus to expand your influence and the potential audience that can listen and understand you, you must include their lives wi...