Yogan's Journey to Life

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing emotion and feelings. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing others to stay in emotions and feelings. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abandon others to their illusions, delusions, and emotions/feelings. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not try to help others walk out of their mind. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up on helping others leave their lies, illusions, enslavement. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place any value above the individual freedom of each person, where I must help them to walk out of my mind, and where I have been valuing different things like my status, my reputation, my perception by others, my wealth, my anything. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think anything could matter more than helping someone walk out of their mind. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think there co...

Fear of Being Alone. We do a lot in the name of NOT being Alone. I have done a lot. How much? I went into years of depression because I had people in my life. I had the attention, the love, the admiration, the worship, celebration, care. I felt needed and wanted, I felt I belonged. I felt like this is who I am, I found myself, this where I am supposed to be and do. All of this that I felt and thought was a lie. Because these feelings are lies. These thoughts are lies. This positivity, this bliss, this pleasure is a lie. How can feeling good be a lie? I was part of some people's everyday life. I got to know them. They would smile at me, and I would make them happy. When I would make they happy, laugh and have fun, I felt amazing. I felt complete, I felt great, I felt wonderful and bliss. This is all I ever wanted to do forever. Just make them happy. I wanted to keep them in my life, and I wanted them to keep me in their lives. I wanted to own them and be owned. I wanted...

I have been having some internal conflict. I had expectations that the Desteni group would be very focused in on process. Absolutely dedicated, where each moment they live self-forgiveness, that they are trying very hard to be here in every breath, yet being easy on themselves, because it is not a force pressure or a contest, because your dealing with yourself here. If you are harsh within stopping the mind, you are harsh with yourself, which creates conflict. Instead you can be direct and clear with yourself, and simply be firm on your decision and stance of who you are. Obviously we can all be much more effective. Its not like the Desteni group is a select breed of humans, they are ordinary people who are consciously facing the consequences that we all as humanity have accepted and allowed to be perpetrated on Life as ourselves, i.e. humans, plants, animals, and the existence. I was worried of being an ego for saying this. However, I have made the decision to disregard that which ign...