Yogan's Journey to Life

 Had an inspiration, and I'm going to write about it before I forget.  What I went through during the times I voiced my love for someone and they reciprocated, and they returned my love. The young years of life, where everything felt optimistic, where all people are good and kind, and that we all want to love. How someone who loves you can, can unexpectedly turn into a monster. Things that I had to watch for then, and prepare. Someone freaking out, what you simply saying hi to them now. Now they completely ignore you, when before they supposedly love you. Well obviously that could not have been love, real love. It was instead a feeling of Euphoria. Love, real love, would exist outside the ideas of the mind, or the beliefs, or the feelings. It is something you see and understand in how the value of life of each person, of all beings, of all sized, shapes and form, equally exist in, and deserve care, recognition, respect, and attention. You see it through action, through your be...

The human mind is an interesting thing. So those from Desteni know this, but most people don't know: about how interconnected your mind, thoughts, emotions and feelings are within everything you do, perceive and learn. It's the missing piece of the puzzle. If we were to structure a classroom, and a teacher and an environment that addresses the mind of individuals directly, which means challenging the thoughts, emotions and feelings of people, and pointing what is practical and decisions that are best for all... doing all of this so as to show each person who happens to be a child, that their mind is a thing that is moving that they can stop and that isn't them. And that they can choose to live something else and direct themselves. And that the only choice that is best can only be what is best for all. To understand the consequences of choices, and so the choices that limit consequence is best. Currently we operate our classroom and teachers without tackling the human...

What is it that matters in Life or to Life? What is it that matters? What is the core purpose or meaning to Life? Many people have asked this questions over the eons of time and generation. Many have died throughout this time. There were also many that did live before they died. Where are all on different points in Life, with different families, backgrounds, power... Many of these things we were born into, yes we were. But its not about what you were given, either as challenges or gifts, but who you were with the life you have been given or born into. Will you turn challenges into gifts? We are all being tested in this way. We are all being challenged in some way. We all have something to learn, something to do, something to expand upon. What is the meaning/purpose to Life? I would say that whatever you DO with the Life you have, that becomes your meaning/purpose that you are living. Whatever you do and apply here, now, today, and then tomorrow and the next day is your Living Pur...

The way I see it, the generation of new children, of the next people is always here. It is always right here that the new people will emerge and take our place. It is something constant. The constant Change, the constant exchanging of hands of responsibilities. Who we are is added onto to the next generation, it makes them stronger and better than us. Isn't that something we should aspire to? Shouldn't we want other people to be more than us? To learn from us? To learn quicker than us and reach a better spot in themselves than us? Should we not want to pass on the torch and make sure the future and path is brighter and better lit for them to walk on. This is what I see the grander purpose of my life to be, and all of our lives as humanity, to make sure that those will come after us have it even better than us. Especially when it comes to the process of self-realization, self-amalgamization, self-transcendence, self-betterment, self-perfection. I really do believe perfection i...

So I'm writing this blog because of something I observed about myself as I got older, and observed about other people who are older than me. And what is leading me specifically to write NOW, in this moment is watching this video. See Link: Link So she started dancing ballet 70 years ago and she never quit. So something about age is funny. Like I mean, I am 29, I don't feel like I'm a different person when I was 13, because of my age or number. I'm still the same person, and the ways that I have changed is not because I'm older, its because of who I decided to be and my decisions to change, and what I decided to do in front of challenges and opportunities. So there are things that I love and will always love. Because why on earth would getting older change things that I love to do? It wouldn't. So its not strange at all for someone who is 80 year old or 90 years old to dance what they love to do, because they are the same person as before. Like  anoth...

The book called the Little Prince... I learned that love is simple. Its simple because I did it as a child. Very simple. I loved my toys. I loved my toys because I spent time with them, I paid attention to them, I interacted with them, I was here with them. I spent TIME with them, I had MOMENTS with them, as memories of experiences. I can remember them and recall them, and I cared for them. When I lost them, I was distraught. I missed them. I can remember them with fondness, with love in me. Only the children know what they are looking for," said the little prince. "They waste their time over a rag doll and it becomes very important to them; and if anybody takes it away from them, they cry..."   "They are lucky," the switchman said"       I'm very sure I understand what love is now. While reading this book, I'm pretty sure I can see it. I see it my past. I can see the moments and the people with who I actually loved and those who ...

Note: I don't have children or a wife/girlfriend, but these words as symbols exist within the mind consciousness system, and so I can do self-forgiveness now on them. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live for the happiness of my family, wife and children. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live for the feeling energy of my family, wife and children. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that real self-expression of happiness and feeling energy of happiness, are completely different. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that I cannot live the purpose of making others happy as feeling energy. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel bad, sad, purposeless, meaningless in my family, wife, children not liking me or not wanting me around. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel bad, alone, isolated, sad, depressed, purposeless, meaningless, whe...

Love is now a feeling I can identify clearly within me. I can see it within me as a trigger to this video game. I can see it trigger when watching this or that movie. I can see it trigger in my memories with this person. Love is a feeling, an energy, which doesn't need to exist. Looking at how it works, how it exists within me: it is triggered by various media. And the moments that I felt love as a feeling with another person, was also triggered by the moment, by the situation. One memory where I felt love as an energy was when I was laying down and holding my girlfriend at the time, the bed was comfortable. The image of the place was perfect. And I felt the energy I generated within me attached to this moment. What is interesting about feelings is that they are attached to only particular or specific moments. For example, you won't find this love when the same "loved one" is yelling at you. How useful can the feeling of Love be, when its not there when you need it?...

The Power to Change who you are is an Immense power. It is immense because it is impossible in the eyes of humanity. It is God-like to have such power to change Self. It is super-hero. It is fantasy, a fairy tale. Just unbelievable, that everyone/anyone can have such power, not matter who they were, what they have done, who they had been. Some religions are seen as great in the eyes of men because they offer absolution from all sins, all past transgression, a clean slate that allows you into paradise, where God forgives you. What about just forgiving yourself? No matter what you have done or been. What about, instead of asking for God or someone else to forgive you, you just do it? So simple. Anyone can do it. A rapist could do it. A child-murderer could do it. Abusers, violent people, sinners could do it. Anyone can recognize that they have done something that isn't best for them and others and they can take responsibility and change. Anyone can. Its just a belief that you h...

So yesterday I was looking at the biases that I have toward women, which include seeing them as better, more honest, more intelligent, more trustworthy, and nice, and kind. And this was brought up thanks to looking at the manipulation that I have faced. Now I have already covered using Confidence, and using anger. And yesterday I sort of started introducing the point of using kindness, and being nice, and happy to manipulate. In this blog I am really going to focus in on this topic. Now one context where I have constantly faced being treated with kindness and happiness is when I was a child. This is something all children face. We treat children with kindness, and being nice to them and happy. So how is this manipulation? Well, how about when you tell a child in a great big happy voice with excitement = "why don't we go over here and do some finger painting won't it be so much fun!!!"  So the child gets excited by what you are saying and follows you and then starts ...

There are a million different abuses and problems in the world. Oceans are dying, the Earth is dying, children are dying and being abused, animals are dying, greed, violence, and an economic that perpetuates it. And on and on.... I am the meaning of Life. Saving the planet is not the point. Saving the world is not the point. Saving children is not the point. Saving the animals, the waters, the people are not the point. I am the point. I am a child. I am a planet. I am a water, a people, a earth. I am an animal. Am I saving me? I am living in emotional turmoil and suffering. I am living in abuse. What am I doing about it? Where is the value for the life that is me? How I treat me, isn't that how I will treat others? Is it possible to do what is BEST for others, even when I am not doing what is BEST for me? I may be thinking I am saving others or doing what is best for others, but is that not from my limited point of view if I am still abusing me, putting me through hel...

This blog post may not be so great. The thing I worked on today involves my relationship with my mom, at an early age. She was my root, my connection to this world. She was my world, my sun, my everything. I felt like I connected to her, I felt understood, I felt I received attention. And when I was not with her I noticed the difference. When I started school, I notice most people, or  really no one gave me that same attention and treated me that way. What I can observe now is that as I met people that actually in some way did give me attention and was nice and kind to me, I started really liking those people, having crushes on them, or just wanted to hug them. You have to understand that I felt so much love for my mom, then I would love to go up to her and hug her. And I related to some of my teachers this way. But why is this? Why feel this way? Because what happens later is the relationship falls apart, where I start talking about things where she doesn't understand. I sta...

When I had a partner I told her that I love her equally. We were talking about how come we loved each other, and I told her, "In truth I know that I could love anyone equally, meaning that it just happens to be you, but it could have been anyone." Suffice to say, NO ONE, in present times, would want to hear that. What do people want to hear, they want to hear how you are special, how you are so beautiful, so wonderful, so precious. My father even tried to teach me that. So this is no secret. But I didn't do that in that moment. For me, I tried not to add any energy to the relationship. I tried to maintain oneness and equality. Because relationships based on specialness or unequal love, is a lie. If you love anyone more than anyone else, that is a lie. Equal love is true love. Equal love is loving everyone equally. This isn't a grand statement. You don't try to increase the energy within you to feel love for everyone. You actually decrease the energy within you...

Ever since I was a child I have seen the world the same. There is something inherently wrong with it. And every time I brought this up with my parents they would resist such a statement. They would talk about how great the world is. So this is about setting the record straight. I will be talking about how the world should be, and you the reader can decide whether there is anything wrong with this world. Also, whether you agree with my solution being the only solution. So when I was in school and simply being there around people, other students, the teachers, I already saw how wrong things were. I remember a situation where I was in Kindergarten and I had kissed some of the girls on the cheek just like I would do in my family. It was a sign of love you could say. Familial love. Just like a hug. When I did this the teacher had put me in time out. I did nothing wrong and the teacher looked at me like I did. She could have very well just explained to me that situation, but she didn’t....

For the past 2-3 Weeks I have been making vlogs. So check out my Facebook page under my videos or See my Youtube Channel: Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY4LU4QVg06KgqTCMkNUtUQ Facebook Videos https://www.facebook.com/yogan.barrientos/videos_by Today I did a vlog that relates to my early childhood. Children: Afraid to be Myself

It seems fitting that since I had written about my dream/desire for the future world, that I write about my dream/desire for a school. I also placing this into words for the first time. In the past I have written about schools, and the experiences that children face based on what I observed of peers during my time as a student, as well as my own experience as a child. I have written also about my perception of sudbury schools. In fact, when I first came across sudbury school material online, I had this experience I felt, but I didn't put it into words. Having worked now at a sudbury school, and being let go from that school, I have to be honest with myself and self-reflect on what I see is needed or missing, especially from this vision I have about what future I want for everyone. Firstly, I do feel hesitant and fearful to say I want a certain future for other people, as if it is wrong or bad or unacceptable to want a certain life for someone. The reasoning is that you can'...