Yogan's Journey to Life

Self-forgiveness on Emotions, Feelings and Thoughts: ] I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I don’t know what I am doing I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel scared I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel nervous      I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel worried I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel alone I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel paranoid I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel surrounded I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I can’t trust anyone I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abandoned I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel watched I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel spied on I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like being aware of my every move because someone...

We are all one and equal. Oneness and Equality requires giving up the ability to Feel emotions and Feelings such as Happiness, Excitement, Love, Joy, Sadness, Anger, Frustration, Irritation. Because your current ability to feel such things are all based in Reactions to something. They are not your Decision, they are not your Deliberate Creation. They only exist because you accept and allow it, because you only exist currently as an Observer. You are not the Directive Principle of your Life currently. You are existing purely as someone who is observing and experiencing Energy. Your entire life boils down to what you Feel, and Experiencing Energy. Do you agree with this truth? Given this, it is shameful, and it is idiotic, and silly, and simply a wasted life and a wasted time, since how many points did you participate in your Life that was merely because of energy? All of them. How many decisions did you make based on the Energy you Felt? All of them. Do you exist at all outside of thi...

So I have an interesting point to share. What I am seeing is that in my body there has been stored programming that has been unleashed when I started to change my posture, my voice, my general holding of my body. So I was someone quite hunched over with my eyes being droppy all the time and not speaking clearly and mumbling quite a bit. I focused some time to change these things, and what I am noticing is that all of this programming in my head/mind came out. And that now I am noticing this point and now I am focusing on doing the SF and to change the inner points of the mind/self. So I'm doing SF on thoughts, emotions and feelings I am having. So here is a cross-reference point for others, that its possible that mind points are hidden within such things as posture, and other physical ways of holding yourself or kind of existing/moving as. I would say in my case I needed to change my posture and how I moved myself in all of these ways directly and so then face all of these mind p...

Much of the Mental Health system is about the Reactive side of things. So like you won't be going to a mental health counselor to get the pointers to maintaining a good mental health. Some synonyms here in this context for good mental health could be: greater self-understanding, more directive in your life, a more stronger self, more perseverance, more courageous, not letting emotions/feelings take over your life, not falling into addictions, being more physical, enjoying the simple joys of life more, enjoying your body more, being more here and attentive to your life, have a deeper more intimate relationship with yourself. So in general, how we define mental health counselors, psychiatrists, and psychologists is that we go to them when we are really sick or really messed up in the head. We don't go to them for advice for proactive ideas for improving ourselves, but for reactive solutions to problems that took years upon years to create, or problems that arose from a traumati...

The human Mind Conscious System works in polarities of good and bad. You have good feelings and bad ones. No matter what you feel, it charges your thoughts: You feel angry so you think about how an idiot someone is, and you think about them in anger. Or someone makes you feel happy, and you think about how good they are to you. This is how thinking works, it responds to how you feel. Its possible to stop the mind, and so stop the thinking and the feeling. Why do this? Because how much do you control your thoughts? Observe and see for yourself that they just move on their own. This is because your Mind manages your thoughts automatically, it creates them for you to hear and see. You don't directly create your thoughts, like on purpose. So your choice is either to participate or not to participate. Either let things happen or stop giving it attention. It is through your awareness and attention that you empower your thoughts and emotions. What is interesting about your mind is t...

The very basic tenets from Desteni is that Emotions, feelings and thoughts? Problems. And its not because Desteni says so. I never listened to anybody just because they say so. Cause that's stupid. But when I heard the first time from Desteni how they describe how Energy works, and how emotions, feelings and thoughts work. Immediately knew it was true because I could see right away across my entire life how this has occurred. Every time I get excited about something or someone I get stupid, where I miss some things or ignore some things and I inevitably create my own downfall and create misery and suffering for myself. I mean, I could tell already in that moment that normal people wouldn't want to believe this to be true, or shall I say deny looking at how it is true and has happened across their entire lives. But its true. And most people will deny it. People will argue that love and light is good. People will defend the right to feel happy and pursue happiness, because it s...

So saying/making the statement I don't care what other people think of me, I feel guilty, bad, resistant like anyone who ever makes this statement shouldn't. Because they are probably suppressing something, hiding something, and that's why they are saying it. Well here is an example of utilizing myself to create what is best for all. Because if I don't even take my thoughts seriously meaning I am actively stopping, and not listening or trusting any thought within me. Why in hell would I feel any differently to what other people think, the thoughts other people have, the opinions, beliefs, judgements, statements. I mean I would only be making it equal, how I view my thoughts, and other people's thoughts. So when I made this statement I saw a change, where I become more effective in what I do. Thoughts are thoughts. Whether they are within you or another person. Its still a thought. Thoughts in themselves are not in the physical or substantial. And the thought...

How Desires really work Desires are things you want, for example a desire for a romantic relationship with a partner; Link: The Desire for a Life-Long Partner Test. It seems that when you a desire you would surely get what you want, right? Let's self-reflect on this question shall we? Have I fulfilled my desires and how long have I had to do so? In my life, I have had the desire for having a partner, and I am 26 years old, and so I have had 26 years to fulfill this desire. What I have seen when it came to my mind and my desire, is that who I am and how I am, is not actually built in such a way so that I would attain this desire. For example, being afraid of not having a partner, which itself prevents me from being comfortable and confident which would in theory attract a partner. Yet my fear of not having a partner is a manipulation of myself to push myself to go after a partner. And so what ends up happening is that I end up thinking about a partner, and imagining what it w...

When I am working through my thoughts and desires, something that helps me is to remind myself that I am a person. That I am not a thought or a desire, instead I am a person, that I can move or do things, create things. Saying this helps and empowers me. I am not a thought because I am a person. I am not a desire because I am a person. I can move, do, and create. And so I can decide who I am and be that. I can self-forgive and stop thoughts. I don't have to accept and allow any thought or desire. I can create. I am a person. A thought can only be a thought. A desire can only be itself. So I know I am not a thought or desire, because I am a person, I Am the one that creates, moves, does and can be many things. While a thought can only be itself, a thought. So I am not a thought, I am a person. To say I am a thought is a lie. A thought is something I have accepted and allowed within me. But I can create, move and do things. This is who I am, I am a person.

Setting up defenses. So why is it important to be defensive when it comes to the process of walking the mind? And what do I mean by defensive? So the mind is in its nature, offensive. Meaning that it will bring up thoughts and reactions within you. It doesn't wait for you. So in that sense the mind is offensive all the time. You can see this for yourself. When you make a decision to do something, no matter what it may be, your mind will find some way to bring itself up in what you decided. So it is also true that there is no escaping the mind's offense. It is a guarantee that the mind will attack. So that is why it is important to set up and prepare a proper defense. Why? In various war games I have played there revealed important themes like the importance of setting up a proper defense, which meant placing/positioning your armies in the most advantageous positions, as well as building structures that would give you the upper hand. Because what is one thing that all of...

Continuing from yesterday.  http://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2015/05/my-goodbad-colored-glasses-268.html Right/wrong. So like good and bad, right/wrong are two words. They are two words meaning the same point as good/bad. They are not aligned to what is best for all. Right is aligned to ego, self-interest, belief as well as what is good. Wrong is linked to inferiority, bad, as well as ego, self-interest and self-definition. They are not part of the assessing processing and determination that is essential to what is best for all, and like good/bad they are one dimensional, and simply a category or label, lived within emotions or feeling.  In a world that is best for all, there is no use for "right " "wrong." There is just that which is best for all, and that which needs to be aligned to what is best for all. If you are staying within a thought or definition of "I am right" or "I am wrong," then you have a mental...

Today, I faced a strange design. I was in a situation where someone was giving general advice, that wasn't directed at me, but when I read it, I took it personal, and I reacted to it. I saw it as myself not following her advice and within that I started feeling guilty. When I broke down the moment this is what I found: At first, I had the Nothing Energy. From there I press the Energy down, and that turns into guilt. If I were to press the energy up, it becomes a high euphoric experience. When I first read her advice, immediately, many different memories were activated, all connected by how I was not following her advice, as evidenced in her memories, and they were connected by failure, where I deemed these memories as being my failures, and I deemed these memories as where I gave up. In reality these memories are not failures or giving up. Yet, that is what I was judging and believing to be the case, as part of this design. This all happened in one moment. So there is part of t...

So I made a list of Personalities of mine. I wrote about 8 down. It was interesting seeing this list. For some personalities, I feel this energy along with it. For other personalities there was no energy and I could move freely within it. These personalities are things I do/act in the moment. In comparison to the energetic personalities, these "happen to me" and it is more about an experience of myself, than an actual doing. One personality that most can relate to, is how we feel and become, when we are first in a relationship. I call it my, "I AM IN a relationship" personality, because that is essentially the trigger. My voice tone changes, I get googly eyed. My head tilts, and I smile profusely. Its very obvious. And for me, as of now, it is still energetic, and it is something that is experienced based, and it just happens to me, versus an a doing/acting/living. For me, it seems obvious that the correct acting/doing/living when starting in a relationship,...

"We are all drug addicts. We are addicted to our minds, energy, thoughts." Drugs. Stimulation. Highs, lows. Delusions. Hallucinations. Addictions. Money. Imagine a man coming up behind you. Inserting a needle in your neck, injecting a drug. You feel high, good. Your high man! You feel happy for no particular reason! You don't know why or how! It's a drug man! You were drugged. It just happened. This happiness isn't real man! It's a drug. We have all randomly feel happy or sad. Imagine swallowing a depressant. You're depressed man! Why? I don't know! I just feel sad man. Why do I feel happy or sad? I didn't choose this! Who says I am to be happy or sad? Who decides? Not me man! So can this be real?! No man! It's not me man. I am an addict man! I want to feel happy or sad, man. I don't know how or why, but I want it man! Just make me feel sad or happy man! Do it to me, give it to me! I will do whatever man! Cars, sex, money, d...

Silence I can become very quiet. I can sit and listen to someone talking to me, as long as they are talking. And I can sit with them in silence. I have never done this before, but I would find it quite enjoyable. That I would live/be with someone, and we would never speak, yet we would communicate without words. Now that I went through a personal journey where I spoke and expressed me, I am looking what is required of me. Meaning that what the moment requires of me, whether it is to speak or not to speak. So to again be silent. And its simply based on what the moment requires. Its funny that I have a slight to resistance to not speaking. It's only slight. I find that I can drown my thoughts in silence. That the silence is all pervading, all consuming, a never ending dark pool of liquid. I have heard some people in my life say that to be silent, to not speak would be a torture, something that they can't do, and would lead to great stress and anxiety. I have s...

Hi, so I will be, like the title says, reassessing and recreating my starting point for blogging. From now on, I will be blogging on substantial points. So no more surface level, or simply touching the surface of the mind. I will be going deep into points of my mind and the general mind. I will be describing in detail, the energies, my experiences, and thoughts I have. So let's begin! I have potential business client, and with this client, there exist a dimension of hope for the future, specifically that she becomes a long standing and permanent client. If such a future were to occur, this would secure a significant amount of income for me. On a practical level, I have already decided to do whatever physical work necessary, meaning as much physical support possible, within the limits of what I can give without upsetting the balance of time I have, to secure her as a client. Why? I am in the beginning stages of a business, and if I secure a good solid ground of clients, no matt...

Knight in Shining Armor So the knight in shining armor is a fairy tale archetype, originating from Medieval Europe. It also relates to the widespread framework for stories involving a male character that saves a female character, and they both fall in love. Within me, I notice such a point, operating on an automatic and feeling level. This feeling reaction I would call feel warm and feeling love. I notice too that there is a connection to pornography, which is another form of story telling, but involving sex. Within pornography, believe or not, is the same feeling of warmth and love, in relation to the female character wishing/desiring/wanting sex. In comparison to the archetypal fairy tale story, the female character wished, wants, and desires to be saved. Within these specific words, and situations, there are images within me, which are energetically charged with the same point. Throughout my life I spent a great deal of time, especially teenage years, thinking about girls, ...

The Relation- Ship Construct. Yay!!! So I have recently mined into a significant vein of the relationship construct of mine. So I made a better deep dent, into parts I didn't see, or at least have suppressed, for a long time. But this is just one part, and there were more points that revealed themselves today! So I will be recap what I have already looked at for myself, and delving into these new points.  So in my personal writings and self-forgiveness I uncovered that within the relationship constrict, and particularly the desire for a relationship, I am actually desiring many points. I am desiring pleasure, to be cared for, to be serviced for example. And within that the greatest desire of them all, sex, which really is just pleasure. This I found being sourced to early childhood experiences of love, and being CARED for (note the wording). As a baby you are helpless, and in my life in particular I was extremely well cared for and I experience energy which I called the love...

Life is currently A Theatrical Production So within applying self-forgiveness aloud, in the moment, with the energy experiences that are here, which before appeared subtle, but since doing self-forgiveness on them, I see them more clearly for how they exist in this moment, here. I see how my motivation is tied to the future, specifically the FEAR of the future. FEAR False Evidence Appearing Real Finding Excuses and Reasons Failure Expected and Received False Emotions Appearing Real Future Events Appearing Real Frantic Effort to Avoid Reality So through doing self-forgiveness in the moment aloud, I saw that I was either constantly accessing the future or the past. So do you know how sometimes we think about a deadline or a future meeting, schedule, work or responsibility? And how we sometimes  think about what we will do, how it will go, what will happen, and how we will handle it? One thing that seems to go unnoticed, or at least not acted upon is that when we do...