Day 899 Why are you accepting and allowing the Mind to Exist at all?

 The One Test: Decide that I will not be thinking for the next few minutes. You are the one who makes that decision. "I decide I will not think for now" See then what happens as you live your decision. What I see is that there are voices, which are thoughts speaking, that are not my decision. I did not decide to think those things. I never decided to think them. I know they didn't come from my decisions. 

This One Test, that all of humanity can perform, reveals how we have a stream of thoughts throughout our day that is not our choice. When we choose something, that is us. When we say I will stop doing this and you immediately stop it. That decision is you. What makes living our decisions difficult is the fact that we aren't paying attention to what we are doing and living in this moment. What we are thinking is not our decisions. Our thoughts is not us. And I will call this collection of stuff that is not us, the mind (as many others have done so in the past and present.)

I am not a voice. I am not a sound. I am not a memory. I am not a record. I am not information, I am not knowledge. I am not a pain. I am not doubt, I am not fear. I am not authority, I am not control. I am not a feeling. I am not judgment. I am not opinions, I am not right. I am not content. I am not a story. I am not words. I am not a hero. I am not defined by the past. I am not controlled. I am not a slave, I am not suffering.

There is so many ways the mind has permeated this body. The mind, for me, has become a voice that at times copies my voice, and so when I say something, the mind copies the same voice and says something to me. That is why I am not my voice, and I am not a sound. 

I am also not a memory or record, because the mind will playback to me things I have said. Who I am is what I live and decide to express now. What I have done or said in the past is in the past, it isn't me. If I believe I am the past, then the mind will use it against me, by bringing up the past and say I am that. Funny how people do that to each other. Coincidence? I think not. 

Similarly I am not knowledge or information. One of the ways the mind gets me is by bringing up knowledge and information that is true. Like how I did something in the past, which was a horrible thing, which is true. And because it is knowledge that is true I accept it, and thus accept the thought and control over me. Even though I wasn't deciding to do all of this. It can be any fact or knowledge, therefore I am not that.

The body does have real physical pains. These common pains require you to stretch and massage tense tendons and muscles. If you don't then the pain will continue. The purpose of the pain is to let you know that it requires physical assistance on your part. But the mind uses this pain against you. It would make me believe that the pain was a sign from my intuition or higher self. That the pain is telling me to not make a certain choice and to make another. Given the importance of choice, I'm sure you can see how the mind can abuse such an access to my choices.  And thus it introduces doubt in myself. Where I fear to feel pain because I fear making wrong choices. Such a weird level of control. 

And the mind would use Authority when speaking to me, at the perfect times. Where it knows I am already doubting myself, already forgetful of what I am doing, of my power, and of who I am. Thus asserting control over me. I am not this Authority and I am not this control.

What goes hand in hand with torture and manipulation is sweetness. Where as a reward for submitting, I would receive happiness, and feeling good. The story of how and why it is changes, but the feelings are always the same. And that feeling, I am not that. The physical pain in comparison is more real as it is indicating something that requires correction, and when you correct it you feel the relaxation of blood flowing to the area and the calming effect on the tendons and muscles. However feeling is centered only in the core of your self within a specific area. And that was not my decision, but also it didn't come from my body communicating to me for assistance. It came from the mind, with its goal/intent of abusing me. The body is and forever will be my ally. 

The mind will bring up judgments of me. Things said in the voices of other people, or things that have been said as records played back at me. It is directed at me, I am the audience of these words. I receive them, and its intent is for me to feel judged. Sometimes its a negative judgment, other times its a positive one. I am not judgment. 

Similarly, the mind brings up opinions, spoken in my voice or the voice of others. Opinions that rile me up, that bring forth emotions. And they have the element of who is the right one? Where some opinion is right and another is wrong. Sometimes it is my voice that is right, other times it is others who are right, and I am wrong. I am not opinions and I am not rightness. I am a Decision. 

I am not the contents of my mind, of the past, of my memories. I am not the contents of skills or abilities. I hold the power of me.

I am not a story. I am not words. I am not a hero. I am not defined by the past. I am not controlled. The mind likes to create a story of what I am doing, and places me as a hero, with a great burden and challenge. It uses words sophisticatedly, to place me into a box. Where I am defined, often utilizing things already done and said and places the words there as a definition of me, which distracts me. I get distracted by the story. But I am not that. I am here, the one that decides. 

The mind basically makes me its bitch, once I challenge my slavery. All that I feel, all of the suffering, it isn't me. It does not define me. It doesn't belong to me, or come from me. I am the one that decides me. My decisions are me. I decide to be committed to each person, to be and do what is needed for our collective growth and understanding of who we are and what we have become.

The mind cannot ever stab me, punch me, or touch me. It cannot ever harm me. It is restricted and trapped in its own dimension. In a sense, it is powerless. All the power rests in me. And thus it accesses my power through me. Through the words above. Through its access of me. It is quite powerful then, because at the moment the average person has no power to say STOP. Yet at the same time they have all the power to stop. We must show ourselves the truth. Power only exists from self.

 Why are you accepting and allowing the Mind to Exist at all?