Yogan's Journey to Life

So if you would have asked me, or if I would have asked myself, what Strength is Last Week.... I would have said/shown like standing up, being rigid, muscular, pushing, tough. But that's not all there is to Strength, and the current definition is not appropriate in certain contexts. So this is what I found, being gentle and embracing what is here, no matter who it is, what they are doing, what they said, what they lived, embrace and accept what is here, doing this.... doing this is the antithesis, the complete opposite to my average response of Strength. In the age of Donald Trump, that definition of Strength of being so masculine, being tough, pushing things through, being rigid, being sharp is clearly shown to be what is is. And that is the natural response for me. SO something that I have been doing unconsciously is breathing in sharply. In seemingly random moments. What I'm seeing here is this, that breathing sharply is me activating this strength, which plays out ...

I saw a pattern within me today about fearing the strong woman. I was assisted by someone who I was reacting to. I was reacting to them in nervousness. They suggested for me to see what words they represent to me, and so not to focus on them as the image. So I took this advice, and I started working on it. I also had a celebrity who I had a similar reaction to in my past who I met. So I tried to see what words they represented. I got a few words that I initially identified but turned out NOT to be the main word, however its related. Initially I saw the words of ease of communication and happy/smiling and friendly. So I took these words with me. And at that point I was looking at the words and trying to stop my reactions. It didn't work and what happened was me kind of controlling myself and restricting myself, becoming a controlled silence. What I did at this point was kind of allow it because I wasn't sure, that maybe this is what my expression is supposed to be. Anywa...

How would I describe Panic? Its something that takes you over. Its much stronger than just fear or worry. Panic really becomes you. You see through the eyes of panic. I noticed how even the taste of my tongue just resting in my mouth change and almost like the flavor of the air changed. I don't think the air really changed, what probably happens is that my perception changed through me being within the emotion. How I stepped out of panic was through my assertiveness and strength within me. I access it through my writings and speaking on what is best for all and oneness and equality. Its a point where I can stand absolutely and become very strong. Though this isn't the end of the story. I made a plan then to handle the situation that lead to the panic. Because you see, there was a situation that occurred that was very unfortunate, very surprising and unexpected. And I had to accept that it is happening. After stopping this reaction like I said above, I went into investigat...

A Passion, a Anger, a Need, an Action, a Doing, a Tenacity, a Commitment... something like your very soul stirring within you... the agitation, the inability to sit still and do nothing. The Strength, the Call for action. This thing I am describing doesn't necessarily have to be here. I don't have to access it. I can just not call upon it, and it won't be here. Simple as that. As long as I call upon it, as long as I bring it here, live it here, it will be here. It takes my action, my initiation, my awareness, my movement for starting the fire, igniting the flames. It otherwise won't just happen most likely on its own. To live this everyday requires a decision everyday to live it. To write this blog everyday requires a decision to write it. To access the best of myself and the strength of this body requires me to call upon it. It won't happen otherwise, everyday. I can feel my heart beating faster. It has a physical effect, a physical activation. I am more...

Strength, Being Strong. Speaking strong. Moving Strong. My Strength I have always been strong enough. I am strong. I have only suppressed it, muffles it, snuffed it out, with fear. I am afraid of being strong and using my strength to change the world. I am afraid of having an affect on people, on having power over people, on having power over the fate of the world, and the lives of individuals. I am afraid of having the ability through speech alone being able to motivate, move people into a direction. I am afraid of the responsibility. I am afraid of failing and being corrupted by power. I fear having power and being powerful.  All these fears are lies. Because being weak, doing nothing, just not participating, not having an affect, not having a say, your just sealing the already existent fate of the world. Right now, it is certain that by doing nothing your damning the world and everyone to hell. That is our current trajectory. So doing something, anything is damn sure better....

I was listening to someone's story about a situation and it reminded me of a mistake I did. Now, there is no way for me to know whether the person is making the same mistake as me. Why that is is because it really has to do with self-honesty, which requires the person seeing/assessing what her situation and who she is within that. So what she shared with me could be completely the case. And that case is that she is facing resistance to doing something. But there is a reactive response that I faced with resistance, throughout my life. That is that I have placed myself in the situations that I would face the most resistance, or that were very difficult and challenging. So this mentality and idea, belief, and desire that it is always good and best to put myself in a situation where I will face resistance, challenge and difficulty, is false. Why that is I can explain with examples. So the first example is that I wanted to be a philosophy major. I had different reasons why I wanted to...

So today, I am looking at how I present myself in the system as my preprogramming. So the question is how do I present myself in the system, by default? So I had a telephone conversation just now. I had called to set up a doctors appointment. I notice how I spoke by default, because I was seeing how I could express myself. So within this process of expressing myself, I will be facing my preprogramming in how I expressed myself for much of my life. I can say I have a familiarity with this, yet at the same time I do not intimately know it. This is why I am writing this blog right now. So I present myself as someone "professional." For me this means being very collected, non-emotional, straight to the point. Also "on the job." If you ever worked with me on  project you would see this clearly about me. I am focused on the work that needs to get done, and this is how I become. So how did I develop this personality or presentation of myself? Through school project...

Max opened his eyes. He looked around and he saw he was in a deep valley. There were boulders around, and people carrying boulders up the sides of the valley. Max spoke to one of the people nearby. She explained that these boulders are your potential lives. You can pick and choose a boulder to take up out of the valley to live your life. Max walked around looking at the boulders. They were of varying sizes. He thought to himself that it must be easier to get out of the valley with the smaller boulder. He went out to see the other people. Throughout the day he watched and conversed with the people. He learned that even with the smallest boulders few ever get out or leave the valley. And something else he noticed. Everyone chose the smallest boulders. He asked them, why do you chose the smallest boulders. They said in response, “you know why, just ask your mind.” And they were right because he previously thought that it was easier to carry one of the smaller boulders. Yet desp...

What is the Greatest LIe? So some questions and misunderstandings from a recent conversation with particular people opened up this point. So it seems very apparent that most people miss this simple but essential point to being Life/Human/Creator.  I am the Law, I am the Word, I am the Authority 219 So in this past blog I detailed the Lie in LIfE. Everything in this world will do EVERYTHING it can to prevent you from seeing and understanding this point. Your very belief systems, nature, and substance of your programming as who you are a personality will prevent you from seeing and understanding this point, for if you did, you would have access to the power and authority that is your real self, your Life FORCE. Are you the Law, the Word and Authority? Probably not. For that would mean taking responsibility. Have you taken responsibility? Probably not, for that would require that you take POWER. Because you see the power, the word POWER, has been conditioned and associated th...

Ego. So I'm getting quicker, faster, more accurate and precise, more correct, and overall better in several things that I have been doing continuously/daily with the intent/purpose of becoming PERFECT or a master of it. So within this I have been experiencing some ego content based thoughts/backchat/words/phrases in relation to other people specifically and how they are. So I am flagging this point, and investigating it. So I would say that becoming better and doing more is a birthright. And that to feel good/god/ego because I am doing it in contrast to others, is delusional. I would actually do things on this starting point to prevent others to become as great as me. One thing that is interesting that I am noticing is that this has happened with only a few things, because I have had moments where I did fail completely, and so such thoughts are absent from this area. Resentment resentment that they did not show me this or teach me this. Anger anger that they are not doing th...

So today I experienced something unusual. That is thinking about my diet, and some other things, such as about my dog. When I would start thinking about things, this would create non-existent problems. So I am creating a flag for this generalized thinking that occurs with seemingly random things, such as with my dog or with food. What I notice within this thinking is that I would start to feel emotional, mainly sad and worried. This would lead/fuel a greater motivation to think more about these things and correct these problems, which before were non-existent. What I notice in general about this specific kind of thinking is that it relates to fixing problems. So I would create a problem in my mind, and I would then think about how to fix it. This would lead to a panic, where I felt worried, scared. Within this panic and thought, I would try and fix things, but really be feeding and validating the non-existent problems. I notice this generally happening in the world in Veganism/Ve...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2209764/ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcendence_%282014_film%29 http://putlocker.is/watch-transcendence-online-free-putlocker.html Hi! So welcome to today's blog post. So today we will be looking at a movie I saw last night. Transcendence. I will be discussing the movie plot and details so this is a SPOILER ALERT. So first of all the word transcendence is quite interesting. It basically means to go above or beyond, usually used in the context of evolving, or becoming better, or overcoming something. For many people this movie was very biblical, but for me it was quite different. So the very basic plot is that a man's consciousness or awareness is copied into a very advance computer, and he starts growing more knowledgeable and powerful. Everyone becomes scared and concerned, and plan on destroying him/it. They are successful. So that is the very basic plot. But like in any story the details matter. What I liked about this movie is tha...

So tonight I am writing, which is the end of the day. Early today, in the morning, I made a commitment to try out something painful, as a reminder. So I am assessing right now what I have found. However, because I am writing a public blog, I should explain what I mean. So this morning, I was looking at something within me. I was firstly looking at how effective I have been in following my schedule. There was much improvement that can be done. I am also on the start making and executing a long plan, and in order for my plan to be effective I need to be consistent everyday. So I was looking into my past and seeing when I had been effective in living out a plan, or living consistently everyday. So I notice already in that moment as I looked back, that pain was something that motivated me. It was the pain of being where I was, that motivated me to seek out a better place to go, which was my college. I had to do much effort to make that happen, involving getting straight A's in h...