Yogan's Journey to Life

Being/Feeling Worthless I felt and believed I was worthless because as a kid I was quiet, shy, I didn't know what to say or what to do. I didn't know how to have conversations or speak. When it came to the girls I had crushes on, that I liked, I didn't know how to speak to them. And to one particular girl who made me her friend, who was super friendly to me, and spent time with me, and invited me to things, I felt/believed I was still worthless, I was too worthless to be with her. I was too worthless for her. I am quiet. I am shy. I don't know how to speak. This self-perception carried on within me. As I grew older and met other girls/women that I had crushes on, that I eventually dated, I still saw myself as too worthless to be with them. As I was with them, held hands with them as we walked, I still saw myself as worthless. I was afraid to say something stupid or I was afraid I wouldn't know what to say. I was afraid I was still too quiet, too shy, too inexper...

So this blog will be from a guys perspective. So hi, I'm male, haha. Even though this topic will cover girls, as seen from my perspectives, I invite readers to switch girls with guys, to see if the same patterns exist within you, even if you may be female, or homosexual/gay. So I am 24 years old, a male, and I identify as a male, and as heterosexual. So that's really like THE word that defines and has defined much of relationship to females/girls in general, "SEX." One thing I can identify right away, is that it is about my beliefs and ideas, not about the actual physical act of sex. I have only had sex a few times, and only had sex when I was 18. So from about the time in elementary school when I first saw GIRLS as something special, unique, interesting to the time I was 18, there was no SEX. So its not really at all about sex. Instead, during that time period, I would think, fantasize, imagine conversation with some specific girls, and would have desires and f...