Yogan's Journey to Life

I am afraid of disrupting things. I am afraid of standing out. I was masturbating the other day within using my body and physical expression, and so without using my mind. Not thinking about women, not thinking about any images. Just purely physical expression. And I have a fear. I have a fear within being independent of stimulation of women, and their images. I have a fear that if I were to ever have a relationship with a women, and I tell her how I am committed to not be stimulated by her as an image or her as an idea. That with sex it would be a pure physical expression where I am responsible for my own orgasm within that, and that so is she. Where it is an act of self-expression and not a stimulation of the mind through triggers and reactions. I have that fear. Because I fear standing out, being different, and not being accepted by others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being a different human being. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing ...

Link, 1st blog on topic : https://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2019/01/day-690-about-being-alone-as-trauma.html 1st Addendum: https://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2019/01/day-691-update-and-addendum-to.html So today is the second Addendum. I have had several different points come up in the last few day and half that would add up and be part of this original mind system of Trauma of Being Alone. The first was a more sexual one. Where I have had a problem within masturbation where a certain line of thought would come up of: "you don't know what you are doing!" so what I did this morning was look at this line of thought within the context of the Trauma of Being Alone, and what I have opened up recently. So within that it became clear that I was digging into my Past Relationship and sexual encounters. One of my past partners said to me "Yogan, you don't know what you are doing, you have good intent, but you don't know who you are."  So I started...

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Knight in Shining Armor So the knight in shining armor is a fairy tale archetype, originating from Medieval Europe. It also relates to the widespread framework for stories involving a male character that saves a female character, and they both fall in love. Within me, I notice such a point, operating on an automatic and feeling level. This feeling reaction I would call feel warm and feeling love. I notice too that there is a connection to pornography, which is another form of story telling, but involving sex. Within pornography, believe or not, is the same feeling of warmth and love, in relation to the female character wishing/desiring/wanting sex. In comparison to the archetypal fairy tale story, the female character wished, wants, and desires to be saved. Within these specific words, and situations, there are images within me, which are energetically charged with the same point. Throughout my life I spent a great deal of time, especially teenage years, thinking about girls, ...

As humans, we are born as babies, who only have but potential. Initially we aren’t capable of much, however with time, care, and nurturing, which include teaching and providing a good example. So who knows our potential until we reach it? So the process of walking out of addiction, of porn or masturbation, is similar to the process of growing from the initial birthing process, what we call as infant or babies. So it takes time, care and nurturing to step out of addiction, including teaching and providing a good example, what it is that you will become. And you are very much a person and are able to adjust and change how well you do in learning and stepping out of addiction. When you look at addiction, it is something that was learned. So to step out of addiction will be the same process, just in reverse, and in this time with your own WILL and COMMITMENT. Because what usually happens with addictions, you just fall into it, not knowing really what you were doing, kind of lik...

So im going to make this blog about reviewing over a helpful thing that I do to support me to stand and direct myself to not fall into the mind, in moments such as video game playing and porn viewing in moments where it is not appropriate. So just to say it, I bring myself to the physical. To be frank, I rediscovered this point within masturbation. I say rediscovered because I have applied this point before but I had stopped, mainly out of fear of this point that it may have been fake or untrustworthy. So it was the mind convincing me that something that was supporting me was actually bad or harming me. So just to talk about the point of masturbation a bit, to make it an little of an introduction, I have been practicing masturbation as a point of being here with my body and directing and moving myself without image or thoughts. So when I do this the objective is to not be thinking of any man, women, any sexual, nothing. So totally no thought. So what I would sometim...

I saw what I wrote yesterday as supportive. Later I noticed I stopped pushing and challenging myself. Earlier this morning, I did push and challenge myself by pushing and challenging myself and everyone internally to live oneness and equality. This is clear for me. For me this is either absolute or not. I cannot pick sides. There is only oneness and equality. If people I thought were honest, turn out to be dishonest, this should not affect me. If I move or act, is should always be me here moving and acting. Living here. Thoughts and emotions and feelings are in separation from self. The words and pictures, things we can live and apply as, are in separation. So we have to direct our words and pictures, as all and one and equal. The same with everything, beliefs, ideas, behavior, fears, desires, we have to direct ourselves whether this removes beliefs or not, the point is clear, oneness and equality. We have to become equal to the mind. The mind is in the superiority seat, because we ab...

"Who and what I stand as, is a programmed system to enslave and control Man so you may never realise or know who you really are as pure life essence, as Man. This is who and what I stand as and I will take any and all necessary actions to ensure that Man as who you are as pure life essence never know or realise who you really are: Even if it means eliminating and destroying myself" http://desteni.org/a/consciousness-the-enslavement-of-man-by-consciousness Conciousness is evil. Consciousness is not best for all (here I use evil to refer to what must be stopped, because its evil).Evil is murder, rape, war, inequality, greed, anger, possession, thoughts, emotions, reactions, feelings, ego, desires, beliefs, anything and everything that does not start from oneness and equality. I longer accept and allow anything which supports inequality, that which is not best for all- this is a living statement of who I am. Practically, the road to manifest oneness and equalit...

So knowledge and information can never be a guiding principle for reality because knowledge and information is not a principle. Knowledge and Information can prove or justify any behavior/action: I hit him because the sky is blue or his skin is yellow or my shoes are untied. This is a logical statement, however anyone with a shred of dignity knows this is wrong on so many levels. Therefore what we should do, what we ought to do, can never be explained by Science or knowledge and information. And that is why what is best for all is always the only option to choose. Because it is itself what is best for all. If this resonates with you, visit the articles at the Desteni website: desteni.org, and read on what is best for all.