Yogan's Journey to Life

So directing another person. I have been figuring this one out: trying to direct another person. Bernard said in a very short chat long ago how a partner has to direct the agreement. Does this mean directing the other person? I don’t know. Maybe he said a partner has to direct the other. Anyway. The point here is no matter what Bernard may have meant or said, I am deciding here and now to not direct another, whether it be an agreement partner or any person really. Especially though in an agreement. I have decided that even in an agreement to not direct the other person. This is a big deal for me, to decide this. I am going to let each person walk their process. Those who have the tools, have the tools, those who don’t have the tools, then if they are ready I will share the tools. More importantly though in an agreement where you are spending such a life time with a person, to not direct the other person. I know its tempting, that is what I believed at least partly believed....

So, I highly advise you read my latest blogs, and all the articles/material from Desteni. Because there it covers all the dimensions that I won't be covering in this blog. There are many problems with love and relationships. In this blog your mind will perceive it as me talking about the positive things of relationship the good. So let's talk about it. Even though this will sound GOOD, it is not good. It just is. It's truth. Only your mind perceives it as good. Okay. So relationships are natural, inevitable. Every relationship you have an opportunity to grow, to learn about yourself through another. You know those great relationships? Great people in your life? The ones you laugh with, smile with and enjoy? So those exist or existed or will exist. Remember that for a moment. One thing that is certain is the relationship will end. Because death is certain. Who are you when you no longer have the relationship. You are mourning, and sad. You are torn. Ever...

So you have heard that the decisions you make have lasting impact on your future. You may have even made certain decisions that changed your life drastically, and that you may regret deeply. So I recently am recognizing and seeing a particular decision I made, which I hadn't fully taken responsibility for and turned out to be a really bad decision, and within/from the consequence of the bad decision, it not only was a bad decision, it also affected who I am, my confidence and my ability to make good decisions. So I realize that this may sound confusing, so let's start with the situation. So when I was 18 years old I entered into my first relationship. This point of a relationship forming was the results of years upon years of thinking, imagination, hoping, desiring, emotions and feelings. So in that sense I created it and the consequence was inevitable. So I was ready and willing to enter into a relationship with ANYONE. So I essentially had no standards, really. So within...

--> These are self-forgiveness and self- corrective statements for day 21. I suggest reading the preceding post before reading this post. By Kelly Posey I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to seek relationships to relive an experience of blessed stored within me as a memory from an early childhood experience, where I believed that it was my relationship with my parents and specifically the particular relationship with my mom that was the reason/cause for my experience within me as a energetic feeling known as love, which in fact was due to an accepted and allowed reaction to something in my environment, and so was separate from me from my mind’s point of view and so not my responsibility that I was powerless and helpless to prevent or control this experience that it was natural and how things were suppose to be, when in fact I am the initial creator and have separated himself from his creation as himself, as the physical, and so why humanity is where ...

--> Oct 1 2012 I saw X, I slowed down to say hi. ( I saw she was looking away and I thought she might be embarrassed) I was watching her eyes as I was telling her: How are you? She responded, good you? (I did not consider she was simply expressing herself) I kept walking, I thought then, imagined, I had told her: I was sitting outside if you wanted to join me. (I had imagined she would like to sit with me) I then reacted in fear, and told myself no, im going to go sit outside like I planned. I went to the spot I had told myself I was going to sit. I thought there would be too many people walking by that it would be awkward. (I thought she would see me sitting close by yet I separated myself fro everyone else) I also thought it would be not sunny, so not cool. I started then heading somewhere there was sun, outside. I had then imagined if I had asked X out, to which I reacted positively (I imagined she would have said yes to me). But I see this point is just in my mind...