Day 796 The Seventh Door- Our Collective Falling or Collective Rising

I am terrified of losing my purpose/vision.... of seeing everyone fall... of seeing it all come to nothing... to see everyone give up... and to lose my vision of everyone's potential and all that we can be. I am afraid of being completely alone.

Bernard said how its about the collective, and its about the collective rights that are individually applied. And how its not about the individual, but about the collective. The quote is here:

"It is not about agreement or the individual, it is about the collective within the consideration of eternity and consequence. In this the individual will be forced to consider the collective and consequence will be according to what the individual accepts as the collective. UNTIL the individual accept EQUALITY as the Principle for ALL within the Collective. The enforcement of Equality is by no other means, But through consequence, as the Nature of the Collective is EQUALITY while the nature of the Individual is Inequality. Thus understand, All Consequence, All Force are always emanating from the Individual WITHIN the Awareness as Collective. Inequality thus WILL END as will individual rights/choice/free will and will Merge as COLLECTIVE RIGHTS INDIVIDUALLY APPLIED -- thus Equality in practice".- Bernard Poolman

So Bernard talked about the collective. And that word is significant for me here and now. Because for the longest time in the beginning of process: I was motivated as standing with and as a Group of People who are standing as their Best, who are Doing their Best in their Process to become a better human being for everyone, for existence, and correct what has been broken.

And now I have lost sight of that vision because I do see the reality of our struggles and how we could be doing so much more.

My vision and expectation was based on our potential and the potential of the human being and choice/creation, which is true even if no one is living up to it.

The vision I had, and the motivation I had was based on something that only I could see, because it was an imagination. It was not here actually. Yet that vision is our potential as people, and it did motivate me to do things I otherwise wouldn't, to push farther than I would wanted to go. And I did define myself not as an individual or a personality, but instead I defined myself as the Group, or the Group of Humanity- or the Collective that is all, or Existence. I defined my value as such, I defined my fate as such, I defined myself and my goals/visions as such. To yes, Kill the Ego or the Idea of simply Me, living My life.

What I am more afraid of than anything is losing this vision. And I feel like its lost.

The question that arises is why not stand as an individual? Can't that be enough? The thing is, its not. Standing as the Collective is enough.

Elrond: “Ónen i-Estel Edain.” (I give hope to Men).
Aragorn: “Ú-chebin estel anim.” (I keep none for myself.)

I do see myself as alone in standing within and as our Potential, and us as a Collective. But as long as I continue standing within and as Our Potential, and as the Collective, than I will be fine. Even if I stand alone, I am still standing with Everyone, even if no one stands with me.

This is the most important point to make sure is clear within me throughout my days. I abandon all Hope and Expectation for other people, but I hold onto the truth of their potential. And I forgive them for they know not what they do.

I am standing with the Collective/All. My definition of myself is that I am the collective. You are me. And I am you. Even if you deny it, resist it, fight it, or kill me for it. We are everyone and each other, and that is Truth.