Thursday, January 23, 2020

Day 791 2nd Door of Fear: Hostile Relationships

What am I afraid of?
I am afraid of all of my close relationships becoming hostile. I am afraid of everyone I know becoming aggressive toward me. I am afraid of an "intervention," where everyone agrees and believes something about me that they have decided I have to change or else. I am afraid of being threatened with banishment, or being kicked out. I am afraid of being forced to change. I am afraid of the threat of being without support in reality. I am afraid of the threat of physical violence. I am afraid of the threat of being killed/murdered. I am afraid of defending myself and fighting violently.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of all of my close relationships become hostile

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of everyone I know becoming aggressive toward me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of an intervention of me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being threatened with banishment

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being kicked out from where I live

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid to be forced to change or become a certain way

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of being without support in reality

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of threats of violence

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to  be afraid of threats of death/murder/being killed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear defending myself physically with violence.

I am afraid of living with someone or working with someone who is aggressive, hostile with me.

I fear someone I live with or work with threatening me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear living with someone or working with someone who is aggressive and hostile with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being threatened by someone I live with or work with.

When I am in a situation with someone I work with or live with where they are reacting with emotions that are aggressive and saying something- I will stop and breathe- and I will look at practically without accepting and allowing any fear with me: what they are actually saying and doing and decide what is practically best for my physical well being and what action is required if any and to be willing to talk about it with them or with people with authority.

I fear talking about fear of aggression from other people.

I fear talking about the fear of hostility I have with other people

I fear talking to someone else about the hostility, aggression that I fear and that I perceive from another person.

I fear tattling on someone or reporting someone.

I fear being open about fears/concerns of my personal safety or threats.

I fear getting other persons in trouble.

I fear rocking the boat.

I fear the person who I reported or talked to an authority about, will become resentful and take revenge on me, and be further aggressive/threatening.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into fear and to do nothing as my reaction to protecting myself from someone in the belief that it will just blow over, and get better.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear reporting someone.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the person taking revenge on me that I reported.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being hurt physically or secretly drugged by someone I reported or tattled on.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take action and rock the boat for fear of threats.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear aggression from other people and threats of violence

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear living someone who I tattled on and fear facing their anger/retribution from me tattling on them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear for my physical safety that it prevents me from speaking up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel powerless to report someone that I live with

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I cannot report on someone that I have to face in the flesh

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I am not fast enough to protect myself physically if someone does become violent

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being in a dramatic situation where it becomes their word versus mine between all of our mutual relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of standing within the truth while being called a liar.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of not being believed, and being questioned.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing relationships because they don't believe me or they simply don't want to decide or be a part of the dramatic situation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear reporting someone in case it starts something of a dramatic situation, which could lead to losing friendships with other people because of it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear standing within the truth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear talking with someone about what I am seeing as inappropriate behavior because I fear that they will take that and start gossiping with others that I said that.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear standing within humility, respect, consideration, and being supportive and to fear that the person will twist my words and take it to others to gossip about me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being open because I fear others will use it to gossip about me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my whole life changing, my world getting turned upside down from me reporting someone or talking to that person what I am perceiving as inappropriate behavior.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to control my physical reality, and how my personal physical life is like, where I live, and where I work, through not talking about what it is that is happening with someone I live with or work with, so that I can keep everything the same.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of taking that steps that represent what is best for me, for others, for all, and integrity, and respect, which may require my whole world being changed, or me having to leave a job, or leave a place where I am living etc...

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing a job, or leaving a job, and having to search for a new job

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear leaving a place, moving, and the time and effort to move.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the time and effort of interviewing for a job.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear job interviews.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear doing what is best for all within it requiring me to simply pick and stick to one path, not really having the choice to say no, and not really having a choice over my physical reality, my job, my relationships, and where I live as it all may be part of outflows from me doing what is best for all.



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