Yogan's Journey to Life

So looking at this word Unity: what first comes up is United States. So if we really live the word Unity, then we wouldn't stop at just united states, but continue to say united countries or united world. I suppose that is what United Nations is. What does it mean to live unity? I suppose on a superficial level we can say that we are the United States, but are we united? What does it mean to live Unity? How about the opposite? We are the Separated States, or the separate countries. We all live in separation. Would we prefer that? Do we enjoy our individuality, and our separateness? Do we prefer that distance between us? What does it mean for us to live Unity? What about within us as individuals? Are we united within this body and mind? Are we united in our self? What would that look like? I think that once we understand what it means to be united within our individual selves, will we then more clearly see how to be united as people. Because unity is an expression. And ...

Doubt regarding whether we know what we are doing or if we really know who we are. Who we are is everyone/all. We are each other. We are each other in another life. We are all one and equal. Doubt is just another hurdle to overcome. When you are aligned within yourself with everyone, with all, it does feel without doubt. You know it. And you live it with your body and you can transform your life quickly. Know that doubt feels crappy and that standing as the message that we are all each other and that we are one and equal, feels pretty good in your body. I suppose we empower doubt through the possibility that doubt is right from a point of truth and knowledge. Let's say doubt is right. But even then doubt is crappy. Believing and living a life where we are all separate, and unequal, and lost and disempowered is crappy. I would rather believe and live then the lie that we are all one and equal, and I will live it until it becomes are reality. And that feels pretty good in the bod...

I am starting to remember and assert who I am. This Journey is long. One of the things we have to do/face is stopping our emotions, such as fear, anger, hate, and love. What this actually means and entails, requires remembering how you were as a child. As a child, you were capable of expression that wasn't based on feelings/emotions. You were capable of such expression that wasn't based on what you felt, or on other people. You just were. You were the expression, be it a Hug, or a kiss, or a dance, or a song, or a painting, or music, or laughter. That expression was real, and it was you that was real in that moment. That is what it means when I say we have to stop our emotions, because we aren't living our expressions when we are staying within our emotions. Even the positive feelings like love, or joy has become something we feel and we react with about other people. It has become a mask or a picture, like a smile that we present to others. It is NOT REAL EXPRESSION. IT ...

The heart and the core of what is wrong with us as Humanity is that we have for eons existed in this relationship to ourselves and each other that consists of separation. This separation is what manifested Energy. Energy is what we feel. Energy is our reactions. Energy is an experience of separation. We define things such as love and laughter, as something someone ELSE DID to us, and GAVE US. That is how we have separated ourselves from each other and from ourselves, through that definition and thus lived out experience of separation. Through the core of ourselves we have defined our individual self as something separate. This identity, and this life, is defined in separation. And because of that, that is how we have created the world that exists and has existed for eons. Our mind produces thoughts in separation of us. Our mind is a proof that we are indeed living the absolute definition of separation, for we are even separate from our own thoughts that they may run on their own, and...

Here is my plan to Create Bravery within what is best for all 1. Write out and speak out the words in writing and in real time moments and conversations online and offline that reflect our collective and individual responsibility for this world, for our own individual actions. 2. Be direct with individuals when what they say and do is direct abuse, by telling them what they are doing, and how it is unacceptable and what I will do in response, which will be for the purpose of assisting them to face their responsibility We all have collectively created this world as it is, and we are all responsible. Even children are self-responsible. There is no one immune or innocent when it comes to this responsibility of existence or all that exists everywhere. Imagine if you were a stranger who walked upon something happening that is abusive. The fact that you walked upon it, and saw it, already means you can do something. Even if it already has transpired, you can still do something to prevent...

Self-forgiveness on Emotions, Feelings and Thoughts: ] I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I don’t know what I am doing I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel scared I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel nervous      I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel worried I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel alone I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel paranoid I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel surrounded I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I can’t trust anyone I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abandoned I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel watched I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel spied on I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like being aware of my every move because someone...

Black Lives Matter The fight to bring justice and reform is important. To protect the lives of people is important. To remove those who don't live with integrity, honor and respect all life from positions of power is important. Currently our culture has been one of money and power. Those who have money, have the power. I have heard proposals of defunding police departments and reinvesting in services such as mental health hotlines that would be first responders designed to handle mental health situations. And to create other such services that can respond instead of the police where force is unnecessary. Force should always be a last resort and it must be wielded respectfully and by those with the utmost integrity and deserving of trust. It is a honorable position, or at least is should be. Obviously that honor has been lost. I think about what if I were to join a police department and be a police officer. Would I be the only good man there? Meaning, that I am looking to be ki...

Aloneness is highly valuable. I realize that the space of aloneness that I had as a kid where its like I could be alone with me and my body even though I was in a entire classroom of people. And with that aloneness I was untouchable, I was safe and free, and more so I had Me. I could Imagine scenery and things happening. I was secure and safe. And no one was pestering me, stalking me, bothering me. No one was after me. I was left alone,  I was respected. But having someone stalk me, go after me, pester me constantly, and me accepting and allowing that is not okay. I have to fight and defend my right to be left alone and at peace. Fuck off! Leave me be. I want to be alone. I don't want to talk with you. I don't want a relationship with you. That Aloneness is sacred. And that aloneness does depend on money. Owning your own space on this earth. Unfortunately that is how it exists, but we have to fight for equal money so all may be free to be alone and create. Being respect...

So the Megaman legends game was a great game. I played it as a kid in the 90s on playstation. I revisted it, and reason why it made it an impact was not the appearance of the characters, the visuals: it was FAMILY and the Goodness/Realness of the people, even though real people in real life are far worse, and far more corrupted. There is something it has in common with many animes where it has that sense of FAMILY, and community, where a group of seeming strangers are actually all united and are friendly, kind and supportive. I know putting words to it already can muddle things, but the point here is that what makes a character great, or something great is actually the same across many mediums. What makes one person great is not how they look, or how they talk. Its not their accomplishments, or money. Its not their skills or ability or power. Its who they are, how they see you, how they see others, and who they are in relation to you and everyone. And that how reflecting that equalit...

I choose to face my fear of being alone, which means that I must put myself into those situations that I fear. This means having the conversations I fear, saying the things I know is best for all, yet I fear it will lead others to leave me alone. So I choose what is best for all over being alone. I choose what is best for all over company. I choose what is best for all over friendship. I choose what is best for all over family. I choose what is best for all over everything/anything. Because if the people in your life can't stand you with you speak/stand by what is best for all, then they are not best for you/all. So no more waiting, no more hiding, no more fearing. Now its time to stand absolutely. Now its time to recognize the Life within me, and the oneness and equality of the Living word and spoken word. Now is the time to be unoriginal, a clone, predictable, because oneness and equality will have only one outcome. Choice becomes irrelevant. Time for the next p...

I am Alone In the stillness darkness, and darkest depths, I am alone In my body, in my being, in myself, I am alone No being, no person, nothing in existence can ever really see me as me, as that I am that is here alone It is a barrier, it is the complete me, it is my living reality in every moment I know no matter what happens, I know no matter where I go, I know that when my body dies, that I still have this aloneness, this me that is me, this point that no one can really stand within and see from and as.  It is both a blessing and a curse that I am alone It is a blessing because it is a rugged landscape of darkness, infinite with potential, like the dark remote jungles. It is a curse because I must conquer the fear of being alone otherwise I remain paralyzed with fear. If I conquer this landscape, I will become infinite in my potential and stand. It is a blessing because no one else can access me, no one else can conquer me, no one else can own me. It is a...

The other day I was talking with someone about something that I had observed recently. And this is how the reason why the Billionaires and the Elite aren't doing what they can to help people like truly and not fakely, is because they don't see all others as themselves. They don't have that point of course you are me and I am you, that sense of equality and oneness with yourself, with others, with your reality. Because if they did then the action would follow naturally. So the main reason why this is important is the point of how we blame the billionaires for the issue, when the heart of the issue is with their heart, and so with our heart. So in our hearts as humanity, are we standing within oneness and equality with humanity? with reality? with each other? with everyone? The answer is no. Because if the answer were yes, then everytime you would ever engage in a conversation with someone, you would listen to them fully, you would ask questions fully, you would see the w...

What do I feel? Fear. What do I fear? I fear losing access to people, to being cut off and shut out. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing access to people, to fear being cut off and be shut out. How do I feel now? I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear standing without fear. Nothing. I am remembering my day. There were moments where I was angry, irritated, yet I did self-forgiveness or I pushed for stopping the fears, emotions, anger. I succeeded in feeling nothing again and in acting/doing what is best for all, I went beyond my limitations. I pushed for integrity of my doing and not for money. In the nothingness, I am home. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear taking responsibility for other people and this world, through who I am in absolute detail. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear going into the depth of a person and seeing all of who they are and all that is here within my ...

When I look into my body, I see tension. Why is there tension? Because of I am thinking of other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not be focusing on me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about how I am perceived by others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about how others would respond to me. Is there anything else inside of me? More tension. Why is tension here? I think about failure. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about my failure in my goals. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about the failure in having an impact. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about the failure to have the impact I set out to do. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am a failure. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to t...

So I see this point within me of the Secret Bully. Where in specific situations, where my mind sees the opportunity to activate, then it will be here: the Secret Bully. The design works as follows. It finds the perfect situations where basically another person will be confronted with me as the Secret Bully, but because we are alone, and because I don't do this openly with groups of people, and moreover I be Good with groups of people, and present myself as a good guy, that it would be strange odd if they were to tell anyone about it. So its highly specific. Understand this is a design, and given that I am writing it out, it loses its power. Because when you write out the design, the pattern, when you expose all the moments where it occurs, then it becomes powerless, because then you know it. When its kept secret and unspoken its like you don't know it. That is why the Secret Mind exists, to keep you trapped, and keep a level of power over you. Your only choice is to stop...

There is a choice between Life or Energy. You can't exist one and equal as Life, with and as this Existence/Everyone, and simultaneously be of Energy/Polarity/Emotions/Feelings/Mind-puppet. Just like how you cannot be simultaneoulsy a person who is living as the self-directive principle of their life, and be a Slave/Reactive-entity to others, where you can be triggered. In ANY MOMENT, you are EITHER one or the other, and its a CHOICE. In every moment there is only One Truth. Its not a matter of debate/opinion, and that itself is already a part of the illusion of the Mind and part of the Separation: THE IDEA OR BELIEF THAT REAL TRUTH DOESN"T EXIST, THAT OBJECTIVITY DOESN"T EXIST, THAT THERE IS A KNOWN, AN ABSOLUTE, A POINT THAT SIMPLY WHAT IS AND ANYTHING ELSE IS A LIE OR FALSE. I mean obviously part of the illusion and deception has at is ultimate goal is to somehow even make the TRUTH unknownable or to even HIDE or DOUBT its existence. I mean that is where you really F...

"Emotions - together with thoughts, feelings, pictures, ideas – the mind in general was placed within each being so that we are able to be controlled and directed and never stand clear as free individuals – free from consciousness. Imagine yourself not experiencing any emotions within your participation in this world amongst others? Imagine what would happen when you state I desire, need or want nothing? Would anybody or anything be able to control or direct you? When the White Light was placed within each being's basic neurological system as mind consciousness systems (your neurology that directs you), at the same time as a generator (to move you) was placed all emotions. That way you are always feeding consciousness which then in turn feeds the constructs linked to our enslavement (systems, the White Light and global consciousness). What I am stating here specifically is that if you allow yourself to delve into the mind and participate within e...

So, to explain my background, I stick with science, and physical evidence. Anything that you can see directly and observe is trustworthy especially if you test it rigorously and repeatedly. That is how Bernard did things too. And its the only natural way to determine what is true. Rigorous testing. So. This video is the best one I saw so far explaining the coronavirus from a medial perspective. https://www.facebook.com/yogan.barrientos/posts/10222228677092854?__cft__[0]=AZUa26G0nI3l6pWC-sYtz2v2QwiGQWrMzLcyR4AoKoVHrYpBzrGhyXxq_aq6wLBaHKJ9PUYy0HwX_zJjC-KcNQFCY8dSV3_Vjj1TpzAsM3K-eF9qy3es1usGcuaVRPTujS8&__tn__=%2CO%2CP-R So the key points is that the virus moves quickly, way too fast. That is what the doctors in the front line are saying. The progression is quick from when a person should be put on a ventilator. And the current numbers/guess is that even on ventilators 50% of people are dying. It is true though that most people will be fine, but you have to consider the elderly, y...

I saw this vision/metaphor of an escalator at a local mall, where it represents a polarity of being stuck on this point of going up and then going down continuously forever. Where what it represents for me is people Joining me and me feeling good about that, and then people being against me, and me feeling fearful of that. And its very much related to being agreed with, and then being disagreed with. So to explain it better, its like in life when you are looking for that point that someone else agrees with you, or with what you are doing, and it gives you that good feeling or sense of someone has joined you and is on your side. Because of that nature of the mind, it works in polarity. So if you accept that above point within you of feeling good in such moments, then you automatically create the opposite, that you feel bad, fearful in this case. So its like then the moments through life where when people disagree with you, and are against what you are doing, your decisions, your...

So yesterdays blog was the intro for these series of blog covering this mind personality. https://yoganjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2020/03/day-813-dastardly-secret.html Today I'm going to start with the walking through the detail of the programming. So less fun description and more breaking down the exact programming. The overarching theme here is enjoyment that is bad. Like laughing at someone else's pain. Bullying others. Being happy when others lose. So the following memories are such moments: Stealing a bottle of bubbles from a fellow student in the 1st grade who won it for some achievement. I saw he was quite happy receiving it. I grabbed it and placed it in my bag. I could see he was sad/upset about it missing. The teacher tasked some students to search the desks/room for it. When they approached my desk, I said go ahead and search everything I have nothing to hide, and kind of did this motion of raising my arms and then crossing it over my chest. I felt a sense of ...