The most important thing that I can offer existence is to show that its possible to live and exist without thought, emotion and feeling. To show what its like to no longer feel insulted, intimidated, scared, worried, love, hope, sadness, excitement. To show what it is like to smile for real, laugh real, spontaneously in the moment, unplanned.Like live words for real like openness, intimacy, bravery, sharing, caring, hereness, strength, standing firm, listening, considering, walking with

Monday, April 8, 2019

Day 710 Self-forgiveness on controlling others

There are some people who I interacted with briefly and they went ahead and made some choices where in my mind I am thinking it was because of me, I caused this. I never really let it go. I blamed myself. I know that its not my fault. So its time to do some SF.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take responsibility for other's selves.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try to be responsible for who someone is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I can be responsible for who someone is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be responsible for the self of another person.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself try to take ownership of another person's self, the who they are.... I cannot, its impossible... I can only take responsibility for my self.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself blame myself for what another person does or decided to be.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am responsible for who someone else is, that its up to me and I am to blame for not doing enough, not saying enough, not doing/saying the right thing, or doing/saying the wrong thing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for other people leaving me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe its my fault if people leave

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for other people leaving.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I can determine who someone is through what I say and do.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think if I didn't prevent a tragedy/travesty/disaster that its my fault

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am more responsible than what I am.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for future people leaving me, through getting to know me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself if someone listens to what I said, but misunderstood or misconstrued it or only took the part they wanted to hear, and believe that its my fault they did that, that I should have said things differently.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I am more responsible than what I really am responsible for.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to  want more power over who someone is, to be able to determine who someone is... I can't

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hate myself for not being able to stop someone from making a certain decision or going down a certain path or leaving.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I was stronger, I had more control over someone to be able to make their decisions for them

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I could be more persuasive and persuade people to make a certain choice.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be attached to the outcome and the decision of someone else.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that I have power/control over my choice/direction and process, and we EACH equally have that power over ourselves, or at least are the only ones who could wield that power, because I understand not everyone is in the same place in their process and are at different places in their process of becoming one and equal to their physical, and birthing life from the physical.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hate not being able to determine who someone is through my words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to determine who someone is and make their choices through my words, like wanting to YELL and INTIMIDATE THEM like a parent.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to control, intimidate, persuade people through my words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to have that power over someone else to through my words I determine their choices/decisions

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I could determine who someone is and run their life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to through wanting/believing I can determine who someone else is, to then believe that others can determine who I am, and my choices in life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to  wish there was something more I can do to help people make right choices

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that every choice is right from the perspective that its the choice that person makes and reflects who they are currently and who they created themselves to be throughout the years of their life, 20 years, 30 years, 40 years etc...

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that everyone determines who they are in the end, no matter the challenge.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge people for the choices they make, for who they are.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I could go back in time and change my choices

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hate the mistakes I made, how I got here, wish I could change things in the past.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I have the power to determine the choices people will make.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish to have control over other people

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that directing one person, ME, is work enough, ughh..... JK

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to through hope, belief, wishing that I can change this reality and make things better through control of who people are.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe this world will be a better place if we can control people

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want control of people in order to save this reality

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe saving this reality is worth any cost, including enslaving others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that controlling everyone and enslaving everyone NEVER works.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget that I have to take responsibility for myself and that is the point each must walk and live for themselves.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear care about someone and enjoy someone and see them making a choice that I wouldn't make.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear caring about someone and never thinking they would leave and THEN they choose to leave.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear seeing someone I care about, leave.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I could control someone and make them stay for their own good.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think I know what is best for someone and what they need.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish I could see more of a person, what they are thinking, so I can say the right things to make them stay and make better choices.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so controlling and so fearful for the future of other people.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use love and care as an excuse for being controlling.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear speaking and saying something to someone that leads them down the wrong path.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear causing someone to go down the wrong path

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the power of my words and speaking

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the possibility of someone taking my words and make bad decisions with it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being a part of, complicit to harmful behaviors due to someone taking my words and using it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself if someone uses my words and does something harmful/abusive due to how they react to my words

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for how people act and choose to be, even when using my words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not being in control of how people take my words

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear people reacting to my words

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hate to lose people, and to think its because of what I said to them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try to make myself responsible for people making their own decisions

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to DIRECT any person's life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let another person DIRECT my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take credit for another person's relationship with their Self.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to when someone takes an advice from me and apply it, to believe its because of me.

Each person is creating their own lives, 100%

We are all creating our own lives

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