“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Thursday, June 30, 2016

Knowing when to walk away

Knowing when to walk away, is something I am learning. Like in a situation where someone is yelling at you, asking you interrogative questions or making accusations, where they are not respectful or considerate of you as a person with worth and value. Just walk away. Say: I will not be disrespected like this. I choose to go, to leave.

It's not easy. In such situations in the past, I have felt scared, worried, anxious, and nervous. There is a fear of how the other person will act or respond. Like they could hit you or yell at you more. Though we have to stand up for ourselves and our well being. We have to. Because who else will? We only have ourselves.

Living a life where everybody just walks all over you, and you don't call out the bullshit, and you just take the shit, is not a way to live for anybody. We need to have self-respect.

I used to think that it taking the shit meant you were strong and being kind to that person. I was wrong. We need to stop the shit when it starts coming out. Otherwise all of our lives will becoming shitty and full of shit.

Monday, June 27, 2016

My dream life

It seems fitting that since I had written about my dream/desire for the future world, that I write about my dream/desire for a school. I also placing this into words for the first time. In the past I have written about schools, and the experiences that children face based on what I observed of peers during my time as a student, as well as my own experience as a child. I have written also about my perception of sudbury schools. In fact, when I first came across sudbury school material online, I had this experience I felt, but I didn't put it into words.

Having worked now at a sudbury school, and being let go from that school, I have to be honest with myself and self-reflect on what I see is needed or missing, especially from this vision I have about what future I want for everyone.

Firstly, I do feel hesitant and fearful to say I want a certain future for other people, as if it is wrong or bad or unacceptable to want a certain life for someone. The reasoning is that you can't step over another person's freedom. But if I am honest with myself right now, I want a world where everyone is pushing me to live a life that is best for everyone, to become better, to become more, to become my most, and in such a world each one is doing it for themselves for real. So it's not just an empty 2 cents of advice but, something that each person lives for themselves. So if I follow the saying, do what other people do, then I am better off. I as a child would have wanted to be surrounded by role models that push for the absolute best world and best people possible. And guess what? I as adult want the same. So I will always want to be surrounded by people that do and live for and as what is best for all, no matter my age. I want a whole world filled with such people. So for children to grow, be raised by people, who are their parents, teachers, friends, family, that are standing for what is best for all, then those children will become what is best for all and live it themselves. Why is this so? I don't know. But it's just obviously so.

As a child, I would have liked seeing a teacher talk about something they faced as a person, a challenging moment and how they grew from that and learned from that. But I didn't.

As a child I would have like to have seen a teacher be vulnerable and shared who they were at a younger age and when they made mistakes, to show that they walked a process to who they are now. But I didn't see any.

As a person now I want to see such people. I want to see the honesty, the realness, the rawness, the truth. How many times do we share our struggles, our difficulties, our challenges, the negative? How many times have we shared how we really changed something negative about ourselves? Why do we pretend living is so easy and perfect?

I mean, cmon! What's the point of living this life if we are never REAL with each other? And we go through life never being real and walking past people who aren't real with us. That would be a sad existence, which is here already.

I want us to drop all the lies, the bullshit, the veils, the masks, the personality, and just be fucking real! Who's with me?

That's what I want. That's would have empowered me as a child. Instead of being sheltered, hidden away from the world, from real living experience. Life is hard, life is tough, and can we really say we are living if we go through life where no one shares how tough life is, and how hard things are, or had been for them? It can only empower us. So cmon.

Let's get real. For everyone, which includes children. If you are real, guess what, people you meet will become real too, which includes children. If you are upset with how unreal people are, which includes children, then look in the mirror and see if YOU are real. And see whether You have been perpetuating the problem. Because it does start with each One of us. If you blaming someone, point your finger at the mirror.

I want the absolute best life possible for everyone! And I want everyone to be the absolute best person possible! And I see that in order for everyone to have the best life people, each one needs to be the best person possible! See how that works? Life is about who you are! That is what matters!

This would truly be a dream life, and it starts with me! This is the age of Life, of real living.

Saturday, June 25, 2016

What to think about in your darkest moments

Something I love to think about or remember, is what I want for the world, for myself, for others. I don't know if I have ever really described it into words, even for myself. But I can feel it and see it. So I would like to share it here and put it into words.

I want a world where all things are appreciated and supported. Where everything is honored, and given what it needs. Where everyone does their part to ensure this reality. Where every human lives courage, care, regard, honor, love, support, resilience, persistence, righteousness, passion, giving, self-respect, accepting nothing less than the absolute greatness of this life, understanding, gentleness, kindness, sympathy, unwavering, and resoluteness.

I want everyone to hold this same vision inside themselves to remind them of it, so that we make it so.

Thursday, June 23, 2016


What is best for all
Oneness and Equality

No one can touch who self is. Only you have access to yourself. This means wherever you go, whatever you do, in any moment, you have self. Building yourself is the greatest investment. Being aware of yourself, and bringing yourself here is the best thing to do in any moment. To be yourself is the best way to live. By bringing yourself here, you bring the answers to questions here. By bringing yourself here, you bring clarity to here. By bringing yourself here, you purify what is here so that it is best for all. Cleanse yourself, repair yourself, through bringing through what is missing=== yourself. What is self?

Self is when you listen to the birds. Self is when you listen. Self is when you breathe. Self is when you move. Self is when you create. Self is when you touch, hear.

Self is when you are here. When self is here, everything that happens in yourself is what is best for yourself. 

I like to

I like to hear the rain fall. I like being here, to hear what is here. To feel the rain, to feel my body, to feel the ground, earth, grass, or sand. I like to hear the sounds. I like to touch what is here. I like feeling the texture, the consistency, the nature of something. I connect with what is here by being here. I connect with the presence of something. I enjoy the presence of the rain, the birds, the sounds, the furniture. I feel myself, my own body. I enjoy my presence. I enjoy the presence of other people. I enjoy myself observing and seeing. I enjoy listening to the sounds. I enjoy this moment. I am here.

I like to make things better. I like to see improvement. I like to see progression. I like to help. I like to make things better. I see everything as an extension of myself. I see myself in everyone. I see myself in everything. I see myself as big as the ocean, and as small as a speck of dust. I see the ocean and dust are one and equal. I see we are all one and equal.

I like to try new things, to learn. I like to learn. I like to see, observe and understand. I like to explore. I like to hear. I like to listen. I like to sense. I like to touch. I like to breathe. I like to teach. I like to show. I like to share, to give. I like to help.

I like to understand myself. I like to see why I do certain things. I like to know what is unknown. I like to discover what is hidden. I like to make things better.

I like to question. I like to doubt. I like to ask why. I like to see whether something is true or false. I like to test things out.

I like solving problems, puzzles. I like figuring out a puzzle, an answer to a question. I like seeing all the different sides or perspectives or dimensions to something. I like to take on different points of view. I like to find an answer that prevents conflict, fighting or misunderstanding, something that all sides can agree on. I like to be the neutral observer.

I like to build, to construct, to move, to create, make.

I like to feel my heart beat, the pressure and flow of the blood in my veins. The warmth of my blood. The skin and texture. The hair. The nails. The muscles.