Establishing the Foundations for the Best Sex Ever 233
Sex
So what is sex?
If you look up the word in the dictionary you will probably
get a medically worded definition. Using my sophisticated Oxford Dictionary, I
have this definition:
Sexual intercourse
1. sexual activity between individuals, especially the insertion of
a man's penis into a woman's vagina until orgasm and ejaculation occur
So first things first, if having good sex, enjoyable sex
were as straightforward and simplistic that this definition suggestions, well…
its not. If all you had to do was to stick your penis in the vagina that would
be great. But anyone who have had sex can attest, No, its not that simple and
straightforward. So if we look at some statistics of sexually related
problem/difficulties.
This website says: “the prevalence of sexual dysfunction is
43% for women and 31% for men in a large American sample.(1) Erectile
dysfunction increases as men age, with 52% of men age 40 - 70 having some
degree of impotence.(2)”
Another website has this to say: “There is an average of
293,000 victims (age 12 or older) of sexual assault each year”
And our final look: Adolescents ages 15-24 account for
nearly half of the 20 million new cases of STD's each year.[1] Today, four in
10 sexually active teen girls have had an STD that can cause infertility and
even death.[2] Also,
though rates of HIV are very low among adolescents, males make up more than
two-thirds of HIV diagnoses among 13- to 19-year-olds.[3] STDs often
have no obvious sign or physical symptom, so regular screenings are critical.[4
Ok, so what is going on here? So there are a number of
points to consider within having sex, and as Humanity, we certainly have not
mastered sex. So the question is how? And to look at our individual lives, to,
in essence master sex. So one perhaps not so obvious point is to look at
responsibility. Responsibility is the first major point, because you have to
take responsibility (ability to respond) over yourself. So self-responsibility
is to, firstly take care of yourself, to make sure you don’t have sex on a whim
on pure impulse or desire and so not checking who the person you are having sex
with, what kind of life they live, because, guess what? That is how you get a
disease transmitted from the other person through sex. But its not only about
the diseases, it also has to do with enjoyment. Let’s face it, sex is something
physically you do, and like everything physical it takes time to learn it. When
you were a baby you took time to learn how to talk, you took time learning how
to walk, everything you have mastered you took time. So is the same with sex.
It will take time.
Ok so there is an advantage to have an intimate, open, and
honest relationship with another human being. Besides the obvious great
enjoyment of these points alone, it also is what allows for effective sex to be
developed, because you both are able to communicate with one another, work
together, learn from one another, and practice, and try new things. In such a
well-built relationship you have the foundation with which to explore, be
adventurous, ask questions, be intimate. If we even just forgot about sex for a
moment, this would be true about any activity you would do together isn’t it?
Imagine if you both had a project that you are both working on, then your
relationship, how you relate will also come through in that project. The same
points come through of being adventurous, asking questions, intimate, open,
honest, creative etc… Does this make sense why sex would be better in such a
well-built relationship? Sex is just an activity, but it involves two people,
otherwise we call it masturbation, which also is the exact same process, but
just with yourself, and so requiring to develop that intimacy, honesty, and
creativity with yourself.
So now comes to my favorite point, why I opened up this sex
point. Sex is physical. If you do sex through the mind, you will be constantly
and regularly be disappointed, and only on rare occasions having an “awesome orgasm”
that lasts only a few minutes and took much effort. And not to mention the
consequences! So sex, good sex, can only come really when you are physical,
when you are physically here, moving with one and equal with and as your body. Why
is this important or such a cool point, because if you master sex, in such a
physical way, you have a very clear reference or starting point of what it
means to be physical, and you can access that at any time, and use that as a benchmark
about where you are in this moment, (wherever you happen to be, whatever it is
you are doing in this moment) as in how physical you are or how much are you
in your mind. Sex is also a great way for people to realize how much more
creative things are and how much more awesome things are when you are physical,
so that’s a great introduction to the physical.
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