“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Creating Peace in My Life Day 176

Peace above all. No more relishing in anger or revenge. No more violence. An active peace, a constant peace. A constant step by step movement towards peace for everyone.  Living practically in such a way to mathematically guarantee peace on earth. Living peace as myself as no resistance and complete acceptance of what is here. In a way, I am already living the end point that I wish to manifest through my practical living. I live peace in what I do, what I speak. I let go when there's no point to hanging on. There's no point to hang onto anger, revenge, jealousy, sadness, pity, frustration... What would be the point of that? It wouldn't be for peace.

I found that I was addicted to anger, to revenge and all the other negative emotions. When I had the proper excuse I would become anger, and express it, receiving a sort of high. I would instigate conflict with those around me. I would probe and push people's buttons. I enjoyed it. I even enjoyed self-pity, and playing the victim. It was a game of emotions.

Like with any addiction, the best place to start is by stopping.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within and as my negative emotions, sadness, anger, pity, jealousy etc... within and as enjoyment, creating a dependency, an addiction, and tendency to create these emotions regularly.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to enjoy to reveling in and experiencing my emotions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create situations and escalate situations, so that I can participate in my emotions more deeply.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to seek out people to be with and hang around so that I can participate in anger, arguing, and fighting, instead of peace, understanding and genuine conversation.

Peace is the only sustainable reality

When and as I see myself feeling emotional - I stop and I breathe- I realize that emotions do not create peace, only war.

I commit myself to seek out people, and build relationships founded on peace, understanding, and genuine conversation. 

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