“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Accepting my limitations Day 175 Part 2

My father. Money. My father buys things for me. If I ruin our relationship, he will stop, or he will leave. Seeing my father as as super hero, indestructible.

I see it that I should see my father, and mother, as one and equal to me, the child. Also that all children and parents and other family members, regardless of age or experience are one and equal.

So my father is just as destructible and vulnerable as I am. I also am capable of earning money and buying things for me. I realize I need to speak one and equal to my father, meaning that I see him as equal to me, not above or below, but one. So there are no pressures or fear, its just like being with myself, exactly like that.

I have already looked at this point in the past, how we make some individuals as better or more for being a certain age, or holding a certain position. For example, how the teacher is never wrong, or how parents know everything. When really that is far from the truth. So we need to become vulnerable and honest, and admit to making mistakes, and capable of being fallible. Because otherwise I have this tendency to feel like I shouldn't make mistakes. Because mistakes are suppressed, instead of revealed and shown for what they are, and accepted so that REAL growth and learning is possible. Also, how the extent of our knowledge will always be limited, as there will always be someone who knows something we don't, because let's admit it, this world is huge! and there are Billions of people on it, let alone all the plants, animals, and geographical areas that exist uniquely all over.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from admitting to and being aware of making mistakes, and having instead suppressed them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from being limited in every capacity, in time, in space, in perception, in knowledge, in memories, in what I can do in each moment, in being an individual that is only one point among a vast ocean of points that together constitute this existence as a whole. 

When and as I see myself viewing another as great or mighty- I stop and I breathe- I realize that we are all one and equal, and any perception that deviates from that, is an illusion.

I commit myself to live up to my potential as a human being, by admitting to and learning from my mistakes, and being aware of and accepting my limitations.


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