“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Day122 BackChat: You don't know ANYTHING!

                 BackChat: Yogan, you don’t Know anything.
                        -Crying
                        -Throat region choked.
-Memory, the moment when an ex girlfriend was upset with me, and she cried, while sat next to her, looking down, feeling that life wasn’t worth living, with her out of my life. “Yogan, you don’t know anything, you say that you are unconditional love, but really you mean you WANT to be it. I felt Depressed
-I lied to her. I presented a false self. I presented myself falsely in my words, in who I said I was. I did speak to her saying the way I wanted to be. Which was an idea, which was energy.
 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to accept and allow the backchat: Yogan, you don’t Know anything, within and as myself
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect crying as a physical response to the backchat Yogan you don’t Know anything, within and as myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the physical response of getting choked in the throat to the words “Yogan, you don’t know anything.”
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words: Yogan, you don’t know anything, to the memory of sitting in X's room when she was crying, and felt upset, and told me, Yogan, you don’t know anything, you say you are unconditional love, but really you mean to say that want to be it, within and as myself
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel depressed when I have memory of sitting in X’s room when she was crying, and felt upset, and told me, Yogan, you don’t know anything, you say you are unconditional love, but really you mean to say that want to be it, within and as myself.
When and as I see myself feeling depressed, when I have memory of of sitting in X’s room when she was crying, and felt upset, and told me, Yogan, you don’t know anything, you say you are unconditional love, but really you mean to say that want to be it – I stop  - and I  breathe -  I realize that I am accepting and allowing mind components to be fed energy through participating in depression and this memory. 
I commit myself to stop this feeling of depression, wherever it may be in life, by investigating what it is connected to  and doing self-forgiveness on it, and its connections.

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