Day 923 RISK

RISK Author unknown 

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool. 

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

 To reach out to others is to risk involvement. 

To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self. 

To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.

 To love is to risk not being loved in return. 

To live is to risk dying. 

To hope is to risk despair. 

To try is to risk failure.

 But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to do nothing. 

The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing. 

They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live. 

Chained by their attitudes, they are a slave, they forfeited their freedom. 

Only the person who risks can be free

This above poem was written in the old desteni forum. Dont know who wrote it. But it was significant for me, so I saved it.
I am in a position where I don't want to risk anymore. And I am pushing myself to risk again. To go after deep meaningful and well connected relationships with people, where you can express yourself fully, wholly, without a second though or guess about it. A person who is there to support you really, and has taken responsibility for their own mind shit, and thus if they react to what you said/do they will instead take it within themselves to work through. So healthy and awesome realationships.

I am scared. And I will risk facing some things. I risk being cheated on, lied to. I risk being gossiped about, having my secret/private words spread around. I risk being humiliated, such as gossip that is based on lies. I risk someone wishing to take revenge on me.
It has happened to me before.

I was cheated on. The girl I was with cheated on me with her ex. And she wasn't sorry about it.

My coworker spread lies about me to get me fired, and it worked. 

I refused to get into anger and revenge. But since then I wondered if I should have done something or said something.

I refuse to be corrupted. To get into anger and revenge. Since I do want to love, to express, to include others, and help them. To walk this path, I risk betrayal, and humiliation. But in my heart I am happy. 

When I speak of the abuses others have done onto me, I risk others not believing me. Doubting me. 

I risk the trust others have in me. 

I risk losing others, by firstly gaining their trust, and having them in my life.

I have lost others, for no reason. Nothing in particular I did at all, and for no apparent reason. A part of me wishes there was a reason for it, cause then I could control it. But just like death, a person can just leave out of the blue. 

But the joys, the good times, the laughter, the trust that is built, the connection and sharing is worth it.That is the foundation of life, where 2 or more join together and create a moment together, that happened.

There isn't anything else left to say. Just get out there and live. Try. Fail. Risk. Win. And Enjoy.

Breathe. And Repeat.  

And just so its said: No one wants all the bad things to happen to you. But you also want to get the wins. So push for that next win. 

Also realationship is an awesome spelling of the word