Fear
With Halloween approaching near, I figure it would be good to address fearful things, such as scary movies. I remember when I was young, I had a babysitter that watched a scary movie on TV. I was very scared, and had nightmares about that movie for many years. It was only when I was 18 did I really confront these fears, understand them and dispel them. Now I can enjoy fear in a playful way, such as with friends for example.
For most parents, it seems better to prevent your child from seeing a scary movie until they are ready. One question that seems unclear is, when are they ready? Taking my own life as an example, no adult sat down with me to explain what fear is, what movies were, how movies were fabricated and fake, and how to also calm yourself down at will. It was only when I was 18 years old that I made the conscious decision to understand fear, and to be able to direct how I feel in a moment. However, I saw myself as perfectly capable of understanding and investigating this since I had the ability to self-reflect, and communicate myself with others. This is something that many children develop already around 4 or 5 years old. The biggest obstacle here is language.
So ideally children would be exposed to fear early on, and that parents support them and explain to them what is happening, and what fear is. Because it is a guarantee that everyone on this planet will be exposed to fear. Fear is unavoidable. Trying to avoid and prevent someone from ever seeing a scary movie or tv show, or coming face to face with a real scary situation, is not possible. It will happen. So the best thing really is to prepare yourself for fear, and understand the fear that YOU are feeling. And it is not that someone or something else is to blame for causing fear, no. Instead fear is a part of a person, that must be understood and directed.
Also, consider that fear is quite ubiquitous. It is found within fear of losing people, or fear of failure, or fear of what others may think of you. So learning to stop your own fear, and seeing it for what it is, is an essential life skill. That is something every person must learn, and in fact many don't learn.
So there's no point in fearing fear, or fearing that your child is exposed to fear. The best thing is to prepare yourself by understanding your own fear and overcoming it, so that you can support others, such as your child to understand their own fear and subsequently overcome it.
For most parents, it seems better to prevent your child from seeing a scary movie until they are ready. One question that seems unclear is, when are they ready? Taking my own life as an example, no adult sat down with me to explain what fear is, what movies were, how movies were fabricated and fake, and how to also calm yourself down at will. It was only when I was 18 years old that I made the conscious decision to understand fear, and to be able to direct how I feel in a moment. However, I saw myself as perfectly capable of understanding and investigating this since I had the ability to self-reflect, and communicate myself with others. This is something that many children develop already around 4 or 5 years old. The biggest obstacle here is language.
So ideally children would be exposed to fear early on, and that parents support them and explain to them what is happening, and what fear is. Because it is a guarantee that everyone on this planet will be exposed to fear. Fear is unavoidable. Trying to avoid and prevent someone from ever seeing a scary movie or tv show, or coming face to face with a real scary situation, is not possible. It will happen. So the best thing really is to prepare yourself for fear, and understand the fear that YOU are feeling. And it is not that someone or something else is to blame for causing fear, no. Instead fear is a part of a person, that must be understood and directed.
Also, consider that fear is quite ubiquitous. It is found within fear of losing people, or fear of failure, or fear of what others may think of you. So learning to stop your own fear, and seeing it for what it is, is an essential life skill. That is something every person must learn, and in fact many don't learn.
So there's no point in fearing fear, or fearing that your child is exposed to fear. The best thing is to prepare yourself by understanding your own fear and overcoming it, so that you can support others, such as your child to understand their own fear and subsequently overcome it.
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