Are you someone trustworthy? Could people trust you do what is best for all, in all situations, forever? Or will you betray people's trust for yourself as an individual separate from the whole?

Becoming someone trustworthy, reliable will be a process. There is no magic here. There is just effort, hardwork, determination, and commitment. Eventually any man can change their own fate with enough time. But time does run out. We do all die.

This world is all of ours, it is our responsibility. Not to do with what we please, but to nurture and care for. Just as we use the earth for nourishing and caring for our bodies, and us as one people. Life never dies, but our opportunity as individuals to get access to Life can die, we can miss out on it.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Hidden resistance, hidden Gift Day 182

I wanted to continue with part 2 of resisting M, however what I experience is not resistance, as how I have defined it. A closer word would be a reaction, and more specifically a kind of sad emotion. This is a bit perplexing, but it is here.

I don't see any logical reason, at least with the information I have at present to feel sad when thinking about M. But the mind is layered, and this is the next layer. In my body it does feel deeper. I perceive this as a remorse or regret for the previous layer, all the anger, hatred, desire to win and be on top. So a remorse and regret for who I was, what I did, and how I treated existence. I remind myself that I can't change the past.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be a ruthless  son of a bitch that only cared about himself and his life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take this existence, my home, in care, respect, and appreciation, by physically and by action taking care of it, showing my respect, and showing my appreciation in how I live each moment.

M reminds me of myself, that ruthless son of a bitch. And I do feel remorse and regret. And I do wish to change. I recognize and appreciate my remorse and regret, because it shows I am still human, or at least I have the potential to become human again. I can still change.

I forgive myself for what I have done in the past, so that I may be strong and focused in the present so that I can create the best future possible for everyone.

When and as I feel remorse or reget- I forgive myself for what I have done in the past and I focused on the present moment to create a future that is best for everyone.

I commit myself to forgive whatever exists in my past, so that I can focus on the present moment, to create the best future possible.

Thank you,

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