“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Learning 197

Learning, coincidentally, is the name of a class I took in college, which is about the fundamental form of learning that occurs in many animals, including humans. And it in some way relates to what I wished to talk about today. So I had an interesting internal experience in the last 24 hours. Who I am, my demeanor, and my general experience of myself and my surroundings changed. There are many components of experiences. Some of them include: guilt, depression, sad, and hopeless. To spoil the ending now: I saw how learning about what is here, that action/movement, especially at a level of who I am, so it is natural and automatic, is important to assimilate and become/live. So I see the best way to explain this is by example.

So in my real life experiences, someone said something to me, and I reacted/judge/assumed that to mean something indirect. So I took those thoughts/beliefs as real. Why? When that moment occurred, there was like a shift where I felt deep within me these experiences of sadness and depression, as if he really is saying/thinking what I am interpreting or believing. I accepted and allowed that, and I was able to recognize this as something that occurred many times. I remember times in elementary school where I felt like this. So it is something that I have participated and accepted and allowed many times, and so that explains why it occurred so naturally this time.

So how is learning a solution. Well for one, I learned how I created this through a long period of time. I also learned through commonsense that I don't really know what my friend is saying indirectly, it could only be assumption, and maybe even just imagination. And so I started applying learning when I felt guilt, sadness, depression, and other components. The content of my thoughts included: "I don't know," which is actually how I identified learning as a solution, because commensensically, if you don't know, then you have to learn. So to learn means also seeing and identifying what is here. So I looked and saw that my thoughts have no backing. Questions that my mind bring up, don't have anyone backing that question with an interest. If there had to be someone, then it has to be me. Similarly the mind has no investment in me learning or knowing, so when it brings up a thought like I don't know, its really meaningless, because there is no interest in me knowing/learning. I have to be the one with interest in learning or knowing. When I scan my memory, my mind has never had that kind of investment, in me, and in the content of thoughts. Really thoughts are empty, like money that has no backing, haha. And thus far, I have been the only source of backing for the mind, and thoughts. So its not even real, just a ruse and deception. Things are not what they appear to be.

Also if the mind ever had any vested interested in me, then every time it would have brought up the statement/question "I don't know" then it would have immediately, and equally bring up a thought like "learn." Not once. I had to do that. And I did do that, and I will have to continue to do that, if I want that to happen: to learn. 

So how does this relate to my class on Learning? Well, like I said, they have found many animals learn with a fundamental system that occurs at a cell level. But when you look at this kind of learning that occurs through the universe, it is limited and dependent on the environment. So in other words, what you learn requires something outside of you to act on you, to learn/respond. Do you know what I realize? Well, this change I did, to apply learning with commonsense, didn't come from the environment, somewhere outside of me. It actually came from me.

The essential principle I was applying in that moment was self-forgiveness. I actually spoke self-forgiveness aloud. And self-forgiveness is an act of learning that is not created by the environment. Instead, it is actually created by You/Me. That's pretty cool and unique, especially because no where else is this really found in daily life, except in my life, because I am doing that.

Another cool dimension is how the content of my learning class, about the kind of learning that is universal that requires the environment to inform you what to learn, is exactly what I created earlier in my life. Many times in elementary school I feel this sad/depressed experience that I was describing, which is how I felt when seeing what my friend said to me. So I "learned" a way to respond to my environment in the exact same way that my Learning described is happening everywhere. So my Learning class did describe something that is happening, right now, and has happened for a long long time. Though its not the only way. There is another way to live/learn, where I determine who I am, and what I learn. So I would actually say that taking the Learning class was very beneficial, as well as learning how to self-forgive and this whole other way of living.

The above link is a free class to learn the how to apply self-forgiveness in a guided format with the help of another person that has been applying-self-forgiveness for themselves for many years. I recommend everyone to take this free online class, and to share the link so that others may benefit. 

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