Worried Parents

I am not a parent. I don't have any kids. But I am worried....

So to explain why this is, I will start with some of my experiences the past 7 months. I have been working at a Sudbury school with children ages 6-12. Now, perhaps a few people in the world can relate to this, but it feels as if some dormant unconscious parental fear has been activating within me. Almost like a programmed put there by nature within all of humanity. But in my case, I am not a father, so this worry I am experiencing is being triggered through the role/position I have been in, where I do watch out for the children's safety. For parents it might seem natural to feel this way. However, because of my life experience, and so frame of perspective, I know that this worry/fear I am experience is anything but natural.

Logically, it makes sense to experience worry and fear if your environment is truly threatening. Which if we look at the genetic history of humanity, there were periods of time, not so long ago, where there were constant threats. It could have been a jaguar or lion, that could be lurking in the shadows or bushes. And children would of course be easy prey. So it makes sense that fear was present during these time periods. However, today it is a completely different world. The number of threats that are actually present and real are very few. One could even see statistical facts about the probability of certain dangers occurring. However, for me I can easily see how seldom such emergency situations have occurred in my life.

While reflecting on my past, I see how fear and worry would have actually been detrimental and have been. Because when I am in fear and worry I make wrong decisions because I act too quickly without assessing properly, all in the name of fear and worry. And when I take into consideration that the design and purpose of fear is either Flight or Fight, I know it is a severe limitation, as certain situations calls for another response than simply fighting or running away. Granted, however, that some situations do actually call for fighting or flight-ing.

So getting back to the topic, having some unconscious fear response that is activating without your permission is unsettling or worrying in itself! So for me the best course of action is obvious, that I must not participate within the fear, and I must remain a stable person within myself having clarity. And I know I can do this by when I see the fear/worry rising within me in relation to the safety and well-being of the children/students, I stop myself for a moment and I take a deep breath and I remind myself of how silly fear is and how unhelpful it is in resolving any conflict or overcoming an obstacle. Then I become practical and so assess the moment and from there decide the course of action. Though in a true emergency I know that action is needed instantly. So this change I am making is within my everyday life experience where worrying is occurring, so I can become more practical, stable, and so actually helpful in everyday life.

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