“…simply make things better for someone else, as if I were to be born again, and that someone else, and it doesn't have to be me, but it could be someone like me, that they would have a better life than I had, that everyone was better. There is something seriously wrong with everyone, and that is something I observed when I was very young. We are the problem, and we need to become better, because we are fucking everything up.”
“So this is who I am. There is something seriously wrong with everyone and we need to fix it, if not for us, then for the future generations."
"Everything I have done in this life, and everything I will do, is for this purpose.”

Thursday, July 28, 2016

How Desires *really* work

How Desires really work

Desires are things you want, for example a desire for a romantic relationship with a partner; Link:The Desire for a Life-Long Partner Test. It seems that when you a desire you would surely get what you want, right? Let's self-reflect on this question shall we? Have I fulfilled my desires and how long have I had to do so?

In my life, I have had the desire for having a partner, and I am 26 years old, and so I have had 26 years to fulfill this desire. What I have seen when it came to my mind and my desire, is that who I am and how I am, is not actually built in such a way so that I would attain this desire. For example, being afraid of not having a partner, which itself prevents me from being comfortable and confident which would in theory attract a partner. Yet my fear of not having a partner is a manipulation of myself to push myself to go after a partner. And so what ends up happening is that I end up thinking about a partner, and imagining what it would be like, and desiring what I imagine, yet when it came to actually being what I believe would attract a partner, I would fail. Why is this? I mean this is really interesting how my design of myself around desiring a partner, is not constructive for actually attaining a partner, and furthermore keeping a partner. In fact, it is actually perfect for keeping me from having a partner, yet continuing in the same position of always thinking, imagining and so desiring a partner. I conclude that desire keeps you in the desire, and it does not actually create what you desire, as if that is foreign to its purpose or ability.

The perfect word to describe how desire works is self-sabotage. Desire is a self-sabotage and a self-deception, because you never actually get what you desire. A question is what are you actually getting out of the desire? I would get an experience out of thinking and imagining a partner. It was an entertaining for me, like a movie I was watching, and it made me feel good in those moments. So again, I am 26 years old and I have this desire for 26 years. I have completely given myself to this desire in so many ways. Is anything of this desire real, or of this experience? No. So it seems clear to me that the desire for a partner is a facade or smokescreen the real purpose or activity. Let's put this real purpose and activity into words shall we?

Thinking, Imagining, and feeling good, feeling high, loved, great, fantastic... This is the reality of what we do when we desire. Desire is just about thinking, imagining, and feeling good. Let that sink in.

So, imagine a person that is only interested in living life through thinking and feeling and imagination. So that this person, when he or she gets a partner, that they immediately go into thoughts, imagination and feeling. That when this person looks at their partner they will be thinking and imagining and so feeling. When this person looks at anything, a tree, their food, their own image in the mirror, the first thing they do is to think, imagine and feel. So basically this person's first response to everything is to think something about that, and imagine something and to feel something. So this person is unable to, and has no desire, to simply just look at things, and be here with the things and people that are here, and to not think something. For this person to Live Life to the Fullest means to experience great and wonderful feelings, that the highlight of their entire life will be those moments when they experienced the greatest thoughts and the greatest feelings. That is his or her purpose for living each day. So if given the choice to be able to always experience the most absolute best greatest wonderful thoughts and feelings for every second always into infinity, they would say YES. If all they did were to simply sit in a room and experience these thoughts and feelings forever, they would say YES. So what's the problem living this way?

The problem is that it is completely separate from everyone else and anyone else. There is no concern for others. There is no care for others. That even when it comes to having a partner, you only care about what you feel and think. You don't care about them. So your life is so completely separate from others. You couldn't be any more separate, or have any less concern for others.

The problem with being separate from others, is that the truth is other people exist. You are not alone. You are surrounded by so many people, and not only people but also other things and life forms. You are not alone. That is the truth. So its a problem when you are separate from everyone and everything, because then you won't intervene, you won't support, and you won't take responsibility for yourself, which has impact on everyone and everything else. What you do or don't do has impact, and you are responsible for your impact. Link: What is Responsibility?

So, if you pursue a life of desire, which means thinking, imagining and feeling great while doing so, you are completely responsible for what you did or didn't do, which has a physical impact because you live in a physical body. So by merely being alive you are having an impact and so have a responsibility. Everyday you eat food, drink water, and use a toilet. Each of things has impact on the lives of others. How food is grown has impact on the lives of others. How water is treated and used, has an impact on the lives of others. No one alive can escape responsibility. So are you alive? Are you honest?

We live on a planet where not everyone is able to eat food each day, or drink safe water each day. You will always be responsible for what happens. What you do though is in your power to decide. It is your responsibility whether this world becomes what is best for everyone or it stays exactly how it is, good for a few people. 

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