Establishing the Foundations for the Best Sex Ever 233

Sex

So what is sex?

If you look up the word in the dictionary you will probably get a medically worded definition. Using my sophisticated Oxford Dictionary, I have this definition:

Sexual intercourse

1.    sexual activity between individuals, especially the insertion of a man's penis into a woman's vagina until orgasm and ejaculation occur

So first things first, if having good sex, enjoyable sex were as straightforward and simplistic that this definition suggestions, well… its not. If all you had to do was to stick your penis in the vagina that would be great. But anyone who have had sex can attest, No, its not that simple and straightforward. So if we look at some statistics of sexually related problem/difficulties.

This website says: “the prevalence of sexual dysfunction is 43% for women and 31% for men in a large American sample.(1) Erectile dysfunction increases as men age, with 52% of men age 40 - 70 having some degree of impotence.(2)”

-       http://www.sexualityandu.ca/health-care-professionals/sexual-dysfunction

Another website has this to say: “There is an average of 293,000 victims (age 12 or older) of sexual assault each year”

-       https://www.rainn.org/statistics

And our final look: Adolescents ages 15-24 account for nearly half of the 20 million new cases of STD's each year.^[1] Today, four in 10 sexually active teen girls have had an STD that can cause infertility and even death.^[2]  Also, though rates of HIV are very low among adolescents, males make up more than two-thirds of HIV diagnoses among 13- to 19-year-olds.^[3] STDs often have no obvious sign or physical symptom, so regular screenings are critical.^[4

-       http://www.hhs.gov/ash/oah/adolescent-health-topics/reproductive-health/stds.html

Ok, so what is going on here? So there are a number of points to consider within having sex, and as Humanity, we certainly have not mastered sex. So the question is how? And to look at our individual lives, to, in essence master sex. So one perhaps not so obvious point is to look at responsibility. Responsibility is the first major point, because you have to take responsibility (ability to respond) over yourself. So self-responsibility is to, firstly take care of yourself, to make sure you don’t have sex on a whim on pure impulse or desire and so not checking who the person you are having sex with, what kind of life they live, because, guess what? That is how you get a disease transmitted from the other person through sex. But its not only about the diseases, it also has to do with enjoyment. Let’s face it, sex is something physically you do, and like everything physical it takes time to learn it. When you were a baby you took time to learn how to talk, you took time learning how to walk, everything you have mastered you took time. So is the same with sex. It will take time.

Ok so there is an advantage to have an intimate, open, and honest relationship with another human being. Besides the obvious great enjoyment of these points alone, it also is what allows for effective sex to be developed, because you both are able to communicate with one another, work together, learn from one another, and practice, and try new things. In such a well-built relationship you have the foundation with which to explore, be adventurous, ask questions, be intimate. If we even just forgot about sex for a moment, this would be true about any activity you would do together isn’t it? Imagine if you both had a project that you are both working on, then your relationship, how you relate will also come through in that project. The same points come through of being adventurous, asking questions, intimate, open, honest, creative etc… Does this make sense why sex would be better in such a well-built relationship? Sex is just an activity, but it involves two people, otherwise we call it masturbation, which also is the exact same process, but just with yourself, and so requiring to develop that intimacy, honesty, and creativity with yourself.

So now comes to my favorite point, why I opened up this sex point. Sex is physical. If you do sex through the mind, you will be constantly and regularly be disappointed, and only on rare occasions having an “awesome orgasm” that lasts only a few minutes and took much effort. And not to mention the consequences! So sex, good sex, can only come really when you are physical, when you are physically here, moving with one and equal with and as your body. Why is this important or such a cool point, because if you master sex, in such a physical way, you have a very clear reference or starting point of what it means to be physical, and you can access that at any time, and use that as a benchmark about where you are in this moment, (wherever you happen to be, whatever it is you are doing in this moment) as in how physical you are or how much are you in your mind. Sex is also a great way for people to realize how much more creative things are and how much more awesome things are when you are physical, so that’s a great introduction to the physical.